A Personal Story
I recently supported my sister during the birth of her first child- a 44 hour labor culminating in a natural birth. You might be thinking, was it all active labor? My response: all of it felt active. Having birthed my own child 18 months earlier, I can truly say that I had
forgotten what a
powerful rite of passage birth is; how difficult it is for
everyone to see a woman in labor; and how profound it is to be supported by another woman, who can look you in the eyes and recognize your strength.
(I, nor my
sister, were one of those lucky women who had an orgasmic birth. Maybe next birth around, I
digress.)
Completely convinced that my sister had a natural
birth only because of the convictions of her doctor and my no-nonsense
approach, I started asking myself what is it that facilitates this experience of
birth. How can a woman assure
herself of the birth that she envisions?
I hear over and over again of women who wanted
natural births. Yet, only 2 of the 7 women in my prenatal yoga class In Brazil ended up with natural births. Here in the US, I have listened to so
many stories of women who think their birth could have gone differently. Some say that their medical team acted as if they
were on board, but were just giving lip service.
As pregnant women, it is important to understand that our birth will change us on every level- physically, emotionally, sexually and
spiritually. For this reason, it
is of paramount importance that this passageway be adorned/guarded/flanked with
the support and safety we need, but also an atmosphere of wholeness and
health. We are the guardians of our own health.
When my nephew was born, the first words out of my
sister's mouth were "I did it!", "I did it!", "I did it naturally." Then she named every person in the room
and said "I did it,..." I believe
that she did something that she wanted to do despite her doubts. There
were several hours in the beginning of labor where she was begging me to take her to the hospital,
saying she could not handle the intensity. I
just kept assuring her that she could do it and she was doing it. When we arrived at the hospital, her doctor said to
her, "look at me, and remember why you chose to work with me." All women deserve this simple
encouragement. We deserve to be
surrounded by others who can handle the discomfort and view it as what it is,
something to pass through rather than bypass.
Affirmations
All women deserve to have the advocacy they need in
order to have the birth that they want. Here are some simple
affirmations that can be helpful in visualizing and actualizing the birth that
you want!
I will do everything in my power for my child to
come into the world in the way that is healthiest for me and for him or
her.
I will do everything in my
power to surround myself by people who are in alignment with my vision, within
my control, but without exception.
I will at times sacrifice my own comfort, as this pregnancy has already
required me to, and as birth will inevitably require, in order to be fully
present for this passage.
I am
open to receive the enormous gifts of feeling my own life-giving potential, and
the extraordinary capabilities of my body.
Kimberly Johnson is a yoga instructor, Rolfer, and mom to Cecilia, living in southern California.