Mindful Mama

Jet Setter

Sarah Kraft — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 15:48:00 GMT

Traveling with a baby or toddler is an experience to be prepared for! The days of packing a few outfits and a magazine for the plane ride are a thing of the past. The following products are some of Mindful Mama’s favorites for you and your little jet setter.

More like a tent for on-the-go babies than a traditional crib, the Guava Family GoCrib is perfect for travel. Set up is simple, and tear down is just as easy (it folds up and fits into a tiny backpack for transport). It’s a super comfy resting spot, but is functional and fun enough to become a play area, too. ($249.99)

Keep baby fresh and clean with Noli & Nali’s Baby Travel Set. The set includes every bath product baby needs — shampoo, body wash/bubble bath, lotion and even bum balm — and it comes in such a stylish pouch, you’ll want to carry it on the outside of luggage! ($34.29)

Maclaren’s Techno Carrier is essential when traveling with an infant. It keeps baby safe and saves mama’s back, all while making a fashion statement with your choice of modern color combinations. A pod insert for the tiniest of babies and a removable bottle holder make this carrier functional and flexible. ($70)

Naptime on the plane will be a cinch with Zoobies. These adorable stuffed animals can be transformed into a pillow or blanket, for a cuddly three-in-one snuggle friend. Zoobies come in a variety of animals (a hippo, giraffe, or crocodile to name a few), but the lion might just be our favorite. ($34)

Gnocchi-n-Cheese

Sarah Kraft — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 19:44:00 GMT

Celebrate St. Patty's Day with gnocchi (spinach mixed with ricotta cheese brings a festive green to the table!). It's a fun recipe to make and eat as a family, and gnocchi lends itself to seasonal adaptations that will delight any young chef!

Place a large pot of water on the stove to boil. Help your child measure and mix together:

8 ounces ricotta cheese (can substitute light ricotta)
2 handfuls fresh whole baby spinach leaves

Help your child add the mixture to a blender (or assist with a hand-blender) to pulse together the spinach and cheese. Let your little chef add more spinach for a deeper green hue.

Help your child measure and add to the green cheese:

1/2 cup freshly grated parmesan cheese
1 teaspoon garlic powder
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon pepper
2 eggs
1 cup all-purpose flour

Add additional flour if needed to form a soft dough.

Let your child shape the dough into 1/2“ to 1” (grape-sized) balls and put them back into the bowl. Once all the dough is made into balls, set aside while making the cheese sauce.

To make the cheese sauce, help your child combine:

6 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted
1/3 cup heavy cream

(For a quick, no-fuss option, purchase a jar of cheese sauce, add a little milk to thin it out, and put it in a saucepan to heat.)

Place the butter-cream mixture in a saucepan on the stove and let it warm until almost to a boil. Meanwhile, help your child grate 2 cups fontina cheese. Gradually mix in the grated cheese and stir until smooth. Remove from heat immediately, or sauce may clump. While the sauce is heating, place the gnocchi in boiling water for 3-5 minutes (gnocchi are done when they float at the surface of the water). If you wish, sauté the gnocchi briefly after boiling. Meanwhile, help your child prepare the toppings. Dream up your own, or try one of the combinations below:

Chopped apples, pumpkin seeds, sautéed chicken sausage and thyme (leaves torn off the stem)
Sliced apricot, sautéed chicken sausage, brie (cut into bite-sized pieces) and tarragon (leaves torn off the stem)

Allow your child to spoon the gnocchi onto a plate, ladle cheese sauce over the gnocchi, and sprinkle with any favorite toppings!

Recipe from theThank You Bites recipe-of-the-month club. Available at the family cooking Web site www.stickyfingerscooking.com.

Healthy Meets Tasty

Sarah Kraft — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 19:43:00 GMT

Eating healthy doesn’t have to be boring! There are plenty of foods available that will please a kiddo’s palate while keeping your conscience clean. Following are some of Mindful Mama’s favorites:

Creating your own pizza with family favorite sauces, cheeses and toppings is a fun way to involve kids in cooking and make something delectable! What better to load up with all of those yummy ingredients than Rustic Crust’s organic pizza crusts? They’re available in two varieties — Great Grains or Pizza Originale — and bake to the perfect crispy texture. ($5.49)

Can Do Kids Nutrition Bars are created by child nutritionists with your kiddo’s health needs in mind. They come in three yummy flavors (chocolate, vanilla and cookies & cream) and are the perfect backpack or on-the-go snack. Along with being tasty, they’re gluten-free, so everyone can enjoy! ($24.10 for 15 bars)

Potato chips — they’re greasy, full of additives and far from nutritious. Thank goodness Frito Lay makes Stacy’s Multigrain Pita Chips. Made from stone-ground wheat flour, whole oats and sesame seeds, they’re a healthy snack option (serve with hummus or veggie dip) and will become a lunchbox favorite when paired with your little one's sandwich of choice.

Ciao Bella’s Banana Mango Sorbet is a delicious desert that won’t spoil a healthy diet (it’s fat-free, so you can guiltlessly indulge, too!). The banana mango flavor is the perfect way to transform post-dinnertime into a tropical beach bash. ($6.99)

Eco (Spring) Cleaning

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 18:28:00 GMT

Take a cue from Mother Nature! Spring is the perfect time to start anew. Purge the dirt and clutter for a fresh beginning. It will not only polish your home, but will make you feel better, too! The following products are must-haves for mindful mamas tackling the spring clean.

Life is tough on carpets and furniture! Stains from your little one’s messy lunch or your pooch’s muddy paws can quickly accumulate from a spot here and there to one big mess. Grandma’s Secret Spot Remover is the perfect solution. It removes grass, blood, grease and more (we love the “more” part) — since the grime mamas have to deal with is endless and sometimes unidentifiable. ($8.95)

Cut your waste in half — literally! The Smash Can from Reduce compacts trash quickly and easily, allowing for more to fit into each bag — which means fewer trips to the dumpster and less garbage bags in landfills. The smart stainless steel design is sleek, making it good for the environment and easy on the eye. ($169.99)

Bathtubs and ovens (not to mention a wall decorated in crayon) are typically the bane of a clean mama’s existence. These surfaces are inevitably grimy, and often take a little (or a lot) of elbow grease to clean. The Twist Loofah Sponge is a two-sided wonder, with a pure cellulose side for simple wipe-downs and a natural loofah side for necessary scrub-downs. ($4.99)

Now that the sun is shining, open a few windows and freshen your home with Aura Cacia’s Aromatherapy Room Diffuser. Simply plug it in, add a few drops of your favorite essential oil (we love the citrusy goodness of their Refreshing Lime and Grapefruit scent), and your home will smell amazing in no time. ($14.99)

Green Start Books: One Tree

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 15:16:00 GMT

Aspiring greenie? Green Start’s board books not only cover sustainability issues — they are made from 98 percent recycled materials and printed with soy-based ink. "One Tree" teaches kids how trees grow, how they change throughout the year, and how they support the eco system around them. The pictures are simple, but feature bright colors that children can relate to. And, if you really want to make it an environmental lesson, read the last two pages (which are for adults), where you'll learn more about the “issue” featured in the book, and find tips on how to get your children involved and interested. ($6.99)

Daylight-Saving Time: Preparing Baby

Sarah Kraft — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 20:08:00 GMT

On Sunday, March 14, clocks will be set forward one hour. With the time change quickly approaching, you may be wondering how to transition baby or toddler without upsetting their sleep routine.

Help your child spring forward beginning Tuesday, March 9, by putting them to sleep 10 minutes earlier each night. Make it easier by comforting, singing or reading, and/or starting your bedtime routine sooner. By Sunday, your child will have slowly adjusted to the new time.

If your baby or toddler’s bedtime is 7 p.m., it will look like this:

Tuesday: 6:50 p.m. bedtime

Wednesday: 6:40 p.m. bedtime

Thursday: 6:30 p.m. bedtime

Friday: 6:20 p.m. bedtime

Saturday 6:10 p.m. bedtime

Sunday: 7 p.m. bedtime (accounting for the time change)

It takes about a week for babies and toddlers to adjust to a new time schedule. Your little one may be a bit cranky, or seem more tired than usual. Stick to your routine and keep naps at the same time. Once you’ve both adjusted, enjoy the increased daylight (which means more playtime!).

A Better Brown Bag

Sarah Kraft — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 20:55:00 GMT

While packing a school lunch is a healthy, economical alternative to sending kids with lunch money, the plastic baggies and paper sacks could use an overhaul. Kids will be proud to tote homemade lunches to school with these environmentally sound (not to mention super cool) lunch accessories.

Ditch the foil and plastic wrap with a Kids Konserve Food Cozy. Package anything — sandwiches, roll-ups, veggies, fruit or treats — in these reusable food wraps and your kiddo will be good to go. They’re easy to wash and fun to use, with bright, modern green and orange prints! ($23 for 5)

Juice boxes are old news with Kleen Kanteen’s Classic version. Send your child to school with their beverage of choice in this BPA-free, stainless steel water bottle. The sport cap option and bold color choices (pink, blue and red to name a few) will have kids loving the earth and their school lunch in no time. ($14.95)

Yubo’s 100 percent recyclable lunchboxes are the perfect brown bag substitute! They contain an antimicrobial agent that inhibits the growth of bacteria (for those Fridays when your kiddo forgets it at school), and are dishwasher-safe (read: easy to clean!). You can even make your little one’s lunch unique by ordering a personalized faceplate. ($21.95)

Send cereal and other dry snacks to school (minus the crunching and crushing) with the Boon, Inc. Snack Ball. It’s the perfect size for a single serving, and the BPA-, Phthalate- and PVC-free whimsical sphere design is smart and stylish. ($6.49)

Potty Training Perfection

Sarah Kraft — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 19:38:00 GMT

Potty training is a major milestone for toddler and parents. Tot can now proclaim “big-kid status” and mom can toss diapers to the wayside — after success has been achieved. Despite its benefits, potty training is a long journey, so Mindful Mama has found some products that will help along the way.

The Little Beetle Learners from Better For Babies are the perfect training pants. They pull on like underpants and snap off for those frantic gotta-go-now moments, and best of all — you can wash and reuse them! The eco-friendly design is sure to please moms, and their sporty aesthetic makes wearing them cool. ($18.95)

Jelly Belly Superfruit Mix are yummy, fruit-flavored candies made from real fruit puree and juices. They’re the perfect incentive for kiddies to use the potty, and won't spoil a healthy diet. ($4.99 for 5.9 ounces)

Boon, Inc. has created a potty bench that’s not only stylish, but handy, too. Tots can use the restroom on a comfy toilet with potty training tool storage on each side (it even has its own toilet paper dispenser) and clean up for mama is easy! A lid folds over the toilet to transform it into a step stool for hand washing afterwards. ($34.99)

Helping your tot go on the big potty can be easy on you and the earth with Growing Up Green’s Bamboo Potty Seat. It fits on most standard toilet seats and is a surprisingly chic addition to the family bathroom. ($15.99)

Bubble Bauble

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 16:47:00 GMT

Jewelry is a little pleasure that I can’t seem to get enough of. I (used to) love to wander around boutiques and search online for handmade finds. Now that I spend my shopping time searching for kid stuff, I rarely indulge in my own simple pleasures. Then again, part of being a mindful mama is finding ways to take care of ourselves, right?! Thus, I recently came across some mama-made eco-friendly jewelry, in the shape of a ring that drew me in. Aimee (the mama who makes it) calls it a patchwork ring, but my toddler loves to point it out and call it my bubble ring. It’s delicate and modern, and the circles (or bubbles if you ask my kiddo) make me smile, especially on those days when I’m running around in them. Jewel Street Designs was born about 14 years ago, after Aimee’s daughter was born with a cleft palate. Being a SAHM, she uses her creative energy to create jewelry from recycled silver and copper. Did I mention the price is right? ($14-$62)

Backyard Bash

Sarah Kraft — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 18:57:00 GMT

Spring hasn’t sprung — quite yet — but there’s no time like the present to prepare! Warmer weather means backyard activities are no longer red-nosed, fingers-frozen occasions. Mindful Mama has selected our favorite outdoor play necessities for the spring and summer days that are right around the corner (we can see them from here)!

Italtrike’s ABC Wooden Tricycle gives tots a vintage-cool vibe as they cruise the playground. Learning to ride is easy, and the paint job (chocolate and cherry red) and durable wood body make it easy (and cool) to pass down from sibling to sibling. ($129.99)

Looking for a gift to give that will get the expectant mama and big brother/sister outside? The Child to Cherish Plant a Maple Tree kit provides seedlings in an adorable, charming package. Planting a tree in honor of baby is the perfect way to bring life into the world in more ways than one. ($9.49)

Keep little ones protected from the rays with Mustela High Protection Sun Lotion. This SPF 50 formula is waterproof and does double-duty. It not only protects skin on the surface (from UV rays and sunburns), but penetrates deep to protect from free radicals, too (they cause premature aging of the skin, so baby will thank you years from now!). ($15)

Little ones who love to explore will go buggy for Melissa & Doug’s Happy Giddy Bug House. The cute, insect-shaped carrier gives kids the chance to examine and learn while their creepy-crawly subjects breathe easy — and stay safe! ($9.99)

Tot Tableware

Sarah Kraft — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 21:45:00 GMT

Mealtime can be challenging when kids are involved. Getting them to eat enough of the right foods, keeping them engaged — and keeping dinner off the floor — what’s a mama to do? Having the right tableware for a toddler is a great place to start simplifying mealtime and making it enjoyable, too!

Bibs have never been better (or more convenient) than the Silikids Silibib. Made from 100 percent silicone, it slides on kids easily and prevents clothing from eating more than your tot. After mealtime, simply pop it in the dishwasher for cleaning! Silibibs come in a variety of fun color combinations and are as stylish as they are handy. ($12.95)

Dandelion ReUsable Bowls are made from polyactic acid, a bioplastic created primarily from corn. They're eco-friendly and kid-friendly, with an easy-grip feature and deep sides to keep food where it belongs! ($7.99 for two)

Evenflo Kid-Tensils are one-stop utensils for toddlers — they’re a spoon, fork and tongs all in one! Create a fun and educational suppertime environment while teaching toddlers how to serve meals and feed themselves independently. ($3.99)

Keep your kiddo’s appetite hearty with the five-compartment stainless steel bus platter from Innobaby. The fun shape will drive kids to food school, with a chance to learn the five food groups and help picky eaters chow down. It’s nontoxic and dishwasher-safe, making life easy for you, too! ($17.99)

Pamper Yourself

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 22:04:00 GMT

Being a mom is a full-time job. You’re constantly giving your all to your children, and most likely not giving as much to yourself. It’s important to indulge and take care of you, too! The following products will provide ample (and quick!) opportunities for mama time, and help your beauty shine.

EO Products uses all-natural therapeutic ingredients to cleanse hair while adding sassy volume with their new Rosemary & Mint Volumizing Shampoo. Rosemary essential oils give locks strength and peppermint essential oils soothe your scalp. Your mane will feel rejuvenated, which will inevitably add some pep to your step! ($8.99)

The Joy of Soap makes shaving — gasp — fun. Elizabeth’s Wild Hair Shaving Soap not only provides a knick-free shave, but also exfoliates skin, leaving legs silky smooth. Its unique blend of clay, ground pumice, willow bark powder and cooling peppermint oil is a must-have for “me” time. ($7.50)

Alba’s Sugar Cane Body Polish uses kukui nut, macadamia, almond and sunflower oils to moisturize as sugar cane scrubs dull skin cells away. Your body luster will be out of this world and you’ll smell amazing (just like dessert)! ($10.95)

Noah’s Naturals Peppermint Lip Balm not only smoothes and moisturizes lips, but gives them sheer kissable shine, too. A smooch from your honey is the perfect cherry on top of a good pamper session. ($2.99)

A Quick — and Easy Change

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 15:43:00 GMT

There are some days that I just hate my diaper bag. I despise how big it is and how it stores so much, yet I can't find anything, especially in the middle of one of "those" diaper changes. So, I was thrilled when I received my Patemm Pad. Created by mama of four, Grace Welch, the Patemm Pad is designed to be a diaper bag and changing pad — all in one convenient, fold-with-one-hand pouch. Named after her two eldest children (Patrick and Emma), Welch created the pad design when she, too, began to find her diaper bag overwhelming.

The design is relatively simple: a round mat that enables mamas to change even the squirmiest of kiddos (or my daughter who always seems to touch those disgusting airport walls mid-diaper change). The mat contains dozens of pockets that can hold anything, from diapers and wipes to a change of clothes. After you're done, you fold it in and roll it up — in any direction. Yes, a mama product that doesn't require a manual! The pads are available in 100 percent GOTS-certified cotton that's machine washable (but not waterproof), or laminated cotton that is PVC-, phthalate- and formaldehyde-free. ($55+)

Room With A View

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 21 Feb 2010 20:03:00 GMT

Providing a posh space for your little one is not only fun for you, but also beneficial to babies and children, as it stimulates their senses and ignites their tiny minds. Get creative and bring the view inside with Mindful Mama's must-have décor!

Shout your baby’s name from the rooftop (or wall) with Lex Modern’s personalized art. These adorable paintings can be personalized with any name and the hip design you choose.

Go green — twice — with Mod Green Pod’s collection of trendy, eco-friendly fabrics. Reupholster an old chair with one of these bold, graphic prints and you’ll create a favorite breastfeeding, storytelling, cuddle nook in no time.

Send baby off to dreamland with Petit Collage bamboo mobiles. The charming owl and bird designs are sure to keep kiddos sleeping peacefully and mamas feeling stylish.

Take wall art to a whole new dimension with Wallables. Their 3-dimensional soy-based creations are playful and exciting. The Jungle Sweeties collection will take kids on a daily safari adventure and the assortment of Disney designs are great for the movie buff.

Boba Designer Challenge: Win $500

Sarah Kraft — Wed, 17 Feb 2010 18:31:00 GMT

Spoonflower is teaming up with the folks from NAP, Inc., to offer you a chance to create the new fabric design for the Boba Baby Carrier, a soft-structured baby carrier made from organic cotton.

NAP, Inc. is preparing for the release of the new Boba 2G--featuring removable foot straps and sleeping hood. To help celebrate, they are seeking nature-inspired fabric designs to be included with the new Boba 2G collection.

The winning design will be featured in the center panel of the carrier and must coordinate with the light or dark brown fabric used on the outside of the carrier.

The winner will receive $500 and the chance to work one-on-one with NAP, Inc. to name the carrier that bears the winning design.

Click here for contest details.

Filled With Great Stuff(ing)

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 15:43:00 GMT

The “stuff” in Lana Organic toys comes from organic cotton fields in Turkey, and is part of a local production initiative that supports fair-pay pricing. The materials are gathered and sent to crafty mamas, who sew these darling animals together in their own homes, through the auspices of the bioRe quality label for control regulations and certification. The design is unique and oh so lovable — just look at him! I love the dragon appendages that flop around, as my son tucks him under arm and toddles around the house. Lana Organic's stuffed animals are irresistible and totally innovative.

Zippity-Doo-Dah

Sarah Kraft — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 23:33:00 GMT

The brilliant folks at LeapFrog have done it again. They’ve taken the attention-grabbing, unarguably entertaining concept of the video game and made it educational and active! Zippity features beloved Disney characters (Mickey, Goofy, Tigger, and Handy Manny to name a few) in a series of eight pre-loaded games. Each game features two levels of learning and play action, focusing on age-appropriate skills, including number and letter recognition, memory, music, basic math, problem solving, art and more. My energetic preschooler loves Handy Manny Fix it Up, which teaches Spanish vocabulary, and Goofy’s Fancy Dancing, which allows her to work out some of the ants in her pants (while exercising her brain, too!). It’s certainly the antidote for cold weather stir craziness! ($79.99)

Sweet Treats

Sarah Kraft — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 04:17:00 GMT

Whether you’re trying to eat well, lose weight or simply keep that New Year’s resolution, it’s important to treat yourself once in a while. Mindful Mama sought out yummy morsels that will satisfy a sweet tooth but won’t compromise healthy eating. Following are a few of our favorites:

Substitute candy popping with a handful of St. Dalfour’s Premium Cranberries. They’re sweet, delicious and surprisingly juicy (St. Dalfour uses a patented vacuum method to package and preserve each berry naturally).

Cozy up to the fireplace and a good book with a cup of Lake Champlain Mocha Hot Chocolate. This all-natural, gluten-free delight is dessert in a cup (top with a dab of whipped cream if you’re feeling super saucy!).

Travel the world through Superfruit Spreads from Crofter’s Organic. Each spread is inspired from fruits found in either North America, South America, Europe or Asia. The rich, fruity taste is sweet but not overpowering. It’s hard to choose a favorite, but Europe’s mixture of pomegranate, black currant, red grapes and cherries is a must-try.

Mi-Del Bite-Size cookies are a great way to enjoy a cookie without going overboard with the portion. Choose from snickerdoodle, cinnamon grahams, oatmeal chocolate chip and gluten-free chocolate caramel. These tasty morsels are so satisfying, you might even want to share some with the kids!

Scrub-A-Dub-Dub

Sarah Kraft — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 04:05:00 GMT

Bath time is often an occasion for bonding with baby and provides the opportunity for playtime as kids get older. It doesn’t hurt to wash away the lunch leftovers, playground dirt and skin art, either! Following are some of Mindful Mama’s splish splash essentials.

Give baby his or her first spa treatment! Spa Baby’s European-style tub lets baby sit upright, versus lying back, and keeps him or her submerged in water up to the shoulders — no chilly baby here! The tub places babies in a warm, comfortable position similar to that of mom’s womb, making bath time soothing and calming.

Boon’s Water Deflector and Protective Faucet Cover slips on the bath faucet easily, directing water flow beyond the faucet for easy shampooing. It also softens the stream so it’s gentle for baby and toddlers (and covers the faucet, preventing head bumps). Along with the functional features, the bubble bath dispenser button lets kids help with bath time (and make bunches of bubbles!).

Kiss My Face Kids Shampoo & Conditioner is an all-natural, 2-in-1 bath time staple. With aloe vera and green tea extract, the healing properties are something a mom can appreciate, and kids will love the sweet scent of natural essential oils.

Chotobaby Bath & Body Wash by Gaia Skin Naturals cleanses without irritating baby’s skin. It also moisturizes and helps heal eczema. Use this to clean baby or toddler — the calming lavender scent is great for before bedtime soaks.

Kiddo Snack Attack

Sarah Kraft — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 03:55:00 GMT

The scenario: Your kids have been running around, exploring and learning all morning (which takes a lot out of them!). They’re hungry and need a snack — preferably one that’s yummy — so they can keep on going (and going!) this afternoon. You need a quick, nutritious fix on hand to foster their playing and growth. The following snacks are easy on your tot’s taste buds and healthy, too.

Maplebrook Farm’s Cheddar Bites are tasty chunks of cheese taken straight from the Vermont farm’s vat before cheese is made into blocks. They’re an excellent source of calcium and protein for little ones. Kids will choose these over processed cheese snacks any day!

Blue Ribbon Naked Nuggets took a traditional kid favorite, chicken nuggets, and turned them into a healthy treat. Forget the fried breading finish. Naked Nuggets are chicken (and savory seasonings) only!

Serve your kids fruit without them even knowing it! Mish Mash, an organic fruit puree snack from Plum Organics, is a delicious, kid-friendly smoothie of sorts that’s packed with vitamin C. Delicious peach, strawberry and banana flavors, and kid-friendly “squeezy” packaging will inevitably become a snack-time favorite.

Substitute unhealthy chips for True North Almond Cranberry Crisps. These all-natural baked goodies provide good stuff (fruit and nuts) while tasting delicious, too!

On-The-Go Mamas

Sarah Kraft — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 03:33:00 GMT

Life as a mama is busy! Running to music class, the market, the gym and grandma’s house can keep you and baby moving constantly. It’s important to be well organized and ready to take off at a moment’s notice. Mindful Mama recommends the following products for when you’re on the move.

Gone are the days when diaper bags are cumbersome and unattractive. Journey Light uses hemp and organic cotton textiles to create diaper bags that are easy to carry, stylish and earth-friendly. Choose from three styles and multiple colors (one is so sleek dad won’t even mind toting it!). Bonus: The “One Small Change” is a bag and changing pad in one!

Orbit Baby’s Infant System makes busy easy — and fun! Their car seat easily docks onto a stroller and base for quick conversion from back seat in the car to driver’s seat for errands. As baby grows up, the base and stroller are compatible with the toddler seat.

Sunshine Kids’ Travel Pal car cargo bin is a great companion for traveling tots. Keeping toys, books and other expedition essentials handy and organized, this gadget also has insulated holders for sippy cups and bottles. The smart design includes waterproof material, just in case!

The Mom’s Grab-N-Go Family Organizer is essential when it comes to keeping your eventful life organized, as well as the lives of your kiddos! The top half of each page is for moms, and the bottom half is for up to four of your kids. Keep it home in the office or throw it in a purse on your way out the door. The cute print is irresistible!

An Affair to Remember

Sarah Kraft — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 18:28:00 GMT

Special occasions deserve festive fare. Whether you’re throwing a birthday party for a friend, celebrating a new home or hosting a soiree for no reason at all, Mindful Mama has the party treats covered.

Serve up Crunchmaster’s Multi-Seed Crackers with your favorite hummus or a cheese platter for surefire snack satisfaction. They’re gluten free, dairy free and certified all natural, so everyone can enjoy!

Vermont Harvest’s Smoky Onion Dip & Dressing Mix is perfect when paired with veggies. Mix the dry base with fresh ingredients for a healthy take on party cuisine.

Satisfy a partygoer’s sweet tooth with Dagoba chocolate tasting squares. Play it safe with traditional milk chocolate — or kick it up a notch with the lavender blueberry flavor. Either way, these tasty little morsels are the perfect way to dish dessert.

Mojitos are a great party drink, but what hostess wants to take the time to hand-muddle ingredients while guests are mingling? Purista Mojito mix makes it simple to serve an amazing mojito — just add the rum! The mix is 100 percent all-natural, so sip soundly.

Show the Love

Sarah Kraft — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 00:42:00 GMT

This Valentine’s Day, Mindful Mama invites you to be creative (and have fun!) as you keep it simple, spice it up and show your eco-love.

There’s nothing like a good, old-fashioned handmade Valentine. Help your kiddos impress their friends and classmates while using environmentally friendly art supplies. Mamas — feel free to make one for your sweetie, too!

P’kolino’s hexagon colored pencils provide a kid-friendly shape that helps even the littlest ones become involved! They are 100 percent color and super durable, so kids can simply keep on coloring (these pencils will inevitably be well-loved).

New Leaf Paper uses post-consumer and agricultural waste to create quality paper products. Whether you want to transform a blank canvas or start with some fun stationary, your valentines are bound to be green.

Look to your closet for old clothing that can be recycled into heart art. Cut designs out of old T-shirts, use tired undergarments or a dress for lace, and find buttons, beads and baubles that can be put to good use. The more unique a valentine is, the more appreciated it will be!

Whether you’re trying to heat things up with your honey or drop hints for the big day, natural products are a must when displaying affection.

Give the gift that keeps on giving (to yourself and your husband!) with a click to Signature Sensuality. Post-baby sex won’t be anything less than plentiful and exciting with the selection of natural toys and products.

Show your love for the planet — and someone special — with Living Ethos cloth gift bags. These durable, eco-chic drawstring bags are a stylish and smart alternative to paper gift wrap. The bright, modern prints will make gift giving more exciting, and they’re made to last forever (just like love).

Flowers are beautiful and clearly a green gift option, but some are grown in a more eco-friendly manner than others. Organicbouquet.com is devoted to only sending blooms that are sustainably grown and certified organic, so you can rest assured you’re getting the best. If you prefer to buy locally or have a favorite floral shop send an arrangement, ask them to only use what’s in season, grown locally and organic (if possible).

Nothing is as classically Valentine’s Day as chocolate. Good thing it’s yummy, too!

Chocolove makes their chocolate bars from premium ingredients only and offers 20 delicious flavors! Whether you’re looking for milk chocolate, dark chocolate or organic, Chocolove is bound to have a bar that will tickle your taste buds.

Green & Black’s chocolate is pure organic and will surely say, “I love you.” Their newest concoction includes caramelized peanuts and a hint of sea salt (so delicious!).

GIve a gift and give back! Endangered Species Chocolate is 100 percent ethically traded, and 10 percent of net profits are donated to help support and protect endangered species, habitats and humanity. Give their new organic bars a try, or order a Valentine’s Day Collection of milk chocolate, dark chocolate, vegan bars or a mix of favorites.

Safe Healing

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 16:24:00 GMT

Moms have a lot of decisions to make regarding the use of medicine to treat or prevent our children’s aliments. When looking for safe, natural alternatives that stimulate the body’s defense mechanisms, homeopathy is a choice high on my list. Hylands Kids’ Kit and user’s guide provides six popular remedies developed by Dr. Maesimud Panos. Treat runny noses, earaches, nosebleeds and more. The Bumps 'n Bruises Ointment is a favorite — especially with toddlers — or make that kids in general! ($29.99)

Nursing Necessities for Working Moms

Sarah Kraft — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 22:46:00 GMT

Breastfeeding is the best way to provide your baby nourishment, but the time required to breastfeed can conflict with a working mom’s busy schedule. Following are some of Mindful Mama’s favorites for breastfeeding moms on the go.

Keep your hands free while baby cuddles up to nurse with the Boppy Organic Slipcover. The slipcover and trim are made of 100 percent breathable, organic cotton fabric and feature a sweet “pea in the pod” design. It's as clean and pure as the little one it’s made for! (boppy.com)

Pump and store milk for your baby with the recyclable Hygeia EnJoye™ Breastpump, designed and registered with the FDA as a multi-user product — so it doesn’t have to end up in a landfill! This pump includes a unique C.A.R.E. button, which lets mom record and play baby’s cry or any other sounds, proven to help with letdown. All pump and kit parts are BPA/DEHP free and WHO code compliant. And, according to Mindful Mama community member and lactation consultant, Sylvia Boyd, the Hygeia is as reliable as it is eco-friendly.

If you’re a lactation consultant or birth educator who works with career-savvy moms, be sure to add InJoy Videos’ Better Breastfeeding DVD and InJoy See What You Read guides to your library. Through demonstration and animation, viewers learn how breastfeeding works, techniques for positioning and an effective latch, signs baby is hungry and how much to feed them, along with tons of other interesting facts. With InJoy’s help, breastfeeding newbies will have confidence in no time! The See What You Read guides offer multi-media education — combining print, online and video content for high-tech moms.

Finally! A baby bottle that meets your standards, from every angle. Dr. Weil Baby bottles are manufactured in the U.S. and designed with AirWave vent technology. All materials and packaging used in the production of Dr. Weil Baby products are sustainable and environmentally friendly, and local manufacturing reduces the carbon footprint. AirWave technology offers a premium venting system to prevent colic. (Available in plastic and glass.)

Looking for a functional, eco-friendly and comfortable alternative to nursing bras (which reveal your stomach while nursing)? Check out the Bamboo Nursing Camisole by Medela. Along with the privacy of this cami comes the anti-bacterial, breathable properties of bamboo. Medela also manufactures glass bottles and a hands-free electric breast pump, perfect for multi-tasking moms.

For additional nursing wear ideas, check out Mindful Mama’s "Style Savvy Nursing Wear."

Got Milk: Providing the Best Nutrition for Your Toddler

Sarah Kraft — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 23:29:00 GMT

When it comes to feeding a toddler, moms are faced with many questions, decisions and transitions. There are challenges, stand-offs, and even some victories, too. With all of these variables, only one thing is for sure: toddlers have tiny tummies, so it’s important to make their nutrition count. One of the very first decisions to make when a toddler is weaned from the breast or bottle is: Will he or she be a milk drinker?

Why Milk?

Breast milk and fortified formulas are essential for children from 1 to 3 years of age, but cow’s milk is a natural transition for many moms when introducing solid foods and new beverages to toddlers.

Cow’s milk has been the go-to beverage for toddlers 1 year and older for centuries. Its nutritional profile most closely resembles breast milk, and it provides a wide array of essential nutrients. Keith Ayoob, registered dietitian and associate professor at New York’s Albert Einstein College of Medicine, calls milk one of the “truly perfect packages” for toddlers.

In a recent paper published in the Journal of the American Dietetic Association, researchers concluded that milk is the leading contributor of minerals (calcium, phosphorus, zinc and magnesium), as well as the best source of vitamins (A, B6, B12 and D), thiamin, riboflavin and potassium in a toddler’s diet. In fact, milk is one of the very few foods that provide vitamin D, a critical nutrient that has an increasing and alarming prevalence of insufficiency in children.

As well as being packed with key nutrients, “it’s very economical at only 25 cents per 8 ounce glass” Elizabeth Ward, registered dietitian and author of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Feeding Your Baby and Toddler, notes (she’s even using an expensive $4 gallon as an example).

NOTE: Ayoob, Ward, and pediatricians and dietitians nationwide recommend that toddlers drink whole milk until the age of 2. Fat and cholesterol play an important role in a toddler’s brain growth and development.

Soy Milk

Moms looking for alternatives to cow’s milk (due to intolerance, allergies or personal preference) might look to soy milk as a nutritious substitute. Soy milk can be a healthy alternative if you’re aware of the nutrients needed to match milk, cautions Ward. Soy provides a complete plant protein, but doesn’t contain calcium or vitamin D naturally, so choose regular, full-fat soy milks fortified with calcium and vitamin D.

Other Milk Substitutes?

Ayoob and Ward agree that rice and almond milks — fortified or not — aren’t appropriate substitutes for cow’s milk. Rice and almonds are nutritious as foods, but neither provide the protein that toddlers’ bodies rely on from milk or soy milk.

Goat’s milk is a viable substitute, as it has many of the same essential nutrients as cow’s milk (calcium, protein and fat), but make sure that it’s fortified with vitamin D. Goat’s milk tends to be more expensive, less available, and has a different flavor that some children may find less appealing.

The Issue of Allergies and Intolerance

Some infants develop a milk allergy, but Ward notes that most kids outgrow their allergy with time, and that moms should work with a pediatrician to monitor this (or any food allergy). Intolerance can create many symptoms, including digestive discomfort, gas, bloating or diarrhea, which can range from very mild to very severe. A true milk allergy is serious and should be treated through elimination and with medical advice. However, lactose-intolerance is usually a matter of degree, and isn’t typically something absolute.

Soy is another common food sensitivity, with symptoms ranging from mild discomfort to downright pain. If a toddler demonstrates symptoms that appear to be associated with soy, talk to a pediatrician or a registered dietitian about making eating experiences both nutritious and pleasant for your child.

Some Things to Keep in Mind

When choosing milk,

Do:

Pay attention to any signs of allergy or intolerance; consult your pediatrician or registered dietitian if necessary.
Provide whole milk until age 2. After age 2, assess total fat intake and adjust accordingly (30 to 35 percent of total calories should be fat).
Incorporate other foods and nutrients in addition to milk. Fruits, veggies, beans, nuts and other lean proteins are important, too.
Limit milk servings to 16 to 20 ounces daily.
Honor your personal religious and philosophical dietary preferences confidently. You can create a nutritious diet that includes animal-based foods or not.

Don’t:

Give children raw milk. “There have been some real safety concerns over raw milk and there is no evidence that raw milk is better. Pasteurized milk is safe, healthy and nutritious for your toddler,” according to Ayoob.

When choosing soy milk,

Do:

Pay attention to any signs of allergy or intolerance; consult your pediatrician or registered dietitian if necessary.
Choose varieties fortified with calcium (30 percent DV) and vitamin D (20 to 25 percent DV) comparable to milk.
Make sure that soy is the first ingredient in the ingredient list, and that added ingredients are limited (especially sugar).
Incorporate other foods and nutrients in addition to soy milk. Fruits, veggies, beans, nuts and other lean proteins are important, too.
Limit soy milk servings to about 16 to 20 ounces daily.
Add a source of vitamin B12 if feeding a vegan diet to your toddler, and speak with a pediatrician or dietitian about other necessary nutrients.

Don’t:

Mistake rice, almond and unfortified soy milks as substitutes.

How do They Stack up Nutritionally?

Following is a chart that compares the nutritional breakdown for milk and a nutritious, fortified soy milk, along with the daily recommendations for toddlers ages 1 through 3 years.

	Whole cow’s milk (8 oz.) 3.25%	Regular soy milk (8 oz.) fortified with calcium, vitamin A and vitamin D	Institute of Medicine Food and Nutrition Board dietary reference intake daily recommendations Age 1-3
Calories	145	~115-150	~850-1000
Protein	8 g	6	5-20
Fat	8 g**	4	30-40
Saturated	5 g**	0.5 g	-
Cholesterol	24 mg	0 mg	-
Sodium	98 mg	115 mg	<1000-1500 mg
Carbohydrate	11	12-15	130
Fiber	0	0.5	19
Calcium	300 mg	300 mg (added)	500 mg
Vitamin A	68 mcg	135 mcg (added)	300 mcg
Vitamin D	100 IU	100 IU (added)	200 IU*
Vitamin B12	1.1 mcg	0	0.9 mcg
Potassium	349 mg	299 mg	3000 mg
Niacin	0.3 mg	1.0 mg	6 mg
Phosphorus	222 mg	105 mg	460 mg
Riboflavin	0.5 mg	0.5 mg	0.5 mg

* The American Academy of Pediatrics recently recommended infants, toddlers and children receive 400 IU daily. The AAP suggests supplementation of vitamin D if a toddler is not getting the recommended amount through diet, which would be almost exclusively through milk or fortified soy.

** After age 2, moms should determine whether to stick with whole milk or shift to lower fat milk for toddlers. Low fat milk provides the very same nutrients, but has less fat and fewer calories.

Organic or Conventional?

Making mindful choices about buying organic versus conventional milk or soy milk for a toddler and the whole family is an important — and personal — decision. However, scientists and dietitians are confident that this is more a matter of personal preference than one of safety. Here’s a bit of information to guide your decision:

rBST-free: rBST is a growth hormone given to some dairy cattle that helps increase milk production. Cows administered rBST are often administered antibiotics, as well. There is no solid evidence that this has any effect on human health, but a label on milk that reads ‘rBST-free’ indicates that this hormone was not used.
Organic: To receive the organic label, dairy cows cannot be treated with rBST or antibiotics. Farmers also cannot use synthetic fertilizers or pesticides on their farmland. Soy milk is also available in organic and conventional varieties. To earn the organic label, all ingredients must be organic unless specified otherwise, such as “made with organic soybeans,” which may indicate other ingredients are conventionally grown or processed.
Local: According to Ayoob, “Most people live within a two to three hour drive of a dairy farm, so it can actually be a relatively green drink.” Milk and soy milk can also travel great distances to get to grocery stores, both organic and conventional varieties alike. Therefore, a local option could at times be more important than organic when making a personal choice.
UHT: Ultra-high temperature pasteurization is a high temperature, fast pasteurization method that sterilizes the milk from bacteria and also extends shelf life. You’ll see this in organic and conventional varieties. It’s safe and does not alter the nutritional quality of the milk.
GMO (genetically modified organism): This pertains to soy milk only. The U.S. doesn’t require a label for this, as science hasn’t conclusively determined an associated risk. However, soybeans and corn are the top two genetically modified organisms in the U.S., so chances are the product is probably genetically modified if not listed as GMO-free.

The Bottom Line

Toddlers and their tiny tummies need food and beverages that are packed with the nutrients necessary for proper development and health, including milk or nutritionally-fortified soy milk. Focus on whole foods and natural nutrient sources when possible, and adapt personal philosophies around these when making the choice on milk and milk substitutes for your little one.

Wendy Bazilian is a doctor of public health, registered dietitian and freelance writer in San Diego. She is also the nutrition specialist at the renowned Golden Door and co-owner of Bazilian’s Health Clinic with her husband, Dr. Jason Bazilian. Dr. Wendy is author of “The SuperFoodsRx Diet.” www.wendybazilian.com

Body Rebound

Sarah Kraft — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 23:48:00 GMT

Experiencing the post-baby body blues? While pregnancy and childbirth are beautiful, priceless experiences, the body you’re left with afterwards may be, well, unlike the body you had before. Being a new mom is a full-time job, and living a healthy lifestyle (getting to the gym, eating right, etc.) may be challenging. Mindful Mama set out to find products that make a body rebound easy — and fun!

Practice suspension yoga, inversion therapy, and strength and core workouts in the privacy of your own home with the OmGym Suspension Yoga Set. Made with 100 percent recycled material, this amazing system will have you eco-fit in no time!

The iPump Pilates app is like a personal pilates instructor on your iPhone! It provides strength training and body toning exercise routines, along with an easy system to log and track fitness progress with — perfect for in-shape mamas on the go.

Relieve your postpartum body and mind with the Gaiam Postnatal Gurmukh DVD. Gentle exercises and poses, designed especially for new moms, are the perfect way to ease back into yoga after baby is born.

Water is one of the most important aspects of a healthy lifestyle, and these days we must be increasingly vigilant about the water we consume — avoiding unnecessary contaminates from plastic bottles and unfiltered tap water. The Cuisinart CleanWater® Countertop Filtration System is ideal for hydration pre-, during and post-workout. The filtration system can dispense hot, cold or room temperature water that can be used for everything from preparing a cup of tea to mixing up low-calorie cold drinks.

Complexion Perfection

Sarah Kraft — Mon, 25 Jan 2010 21:57:00 GMT

Motherhood can be rough on your complexion — sleep deprivation, worry and laugh lines, sun damage from afternoons at the park. For those of us who lack the time (or funds) for an official day at the spa, EmerginC’s vitamin C + retinol mask comes to the rescue ($47.50). A clay-based cocktail of supercharged ingredients, including lemon juice, vitamin C, green tea and retinol, this mask tones, tightens and exfoliates, reducing the appearance of fine lines and diminishing dark spots from pregnancy or sun damage. Results are immediately noticeable! Plus, a little bit goes a long way, which means you'll glow for months, all for less than the price of one facial.

Tea Time

Sarah Kraft — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 22:22:00 GMT

Have fun while teaching your children table etiquette. Invite three to four friends — or favorite dolls — to tea. By age 3, your little one is ready to pour drinks from a pitcher, serve themselves, and use a (dull) butter knife. At the tea table, you can demonstrate how to drink without slurping, sit with good posture and place a napkin in your lap. Don’t be afraid to bring out the fine china or get creative with the menu! Put your little one in the role of hostess (or host) and let them shine. Here are a few of our teatime favorites to get you started:

Tempt your palate with Zhena’s Gypsy herbal teas. Blended from fair trade, organically-grown herbs, flora, botanicals, plant-based essential oils and spices, these teas are handcrafted to soothe and rejuvenate.

Sweeten tea with the soothing flavor of Whirl-Ease Honey sticks by Strawberry Hill. Re-sealable, stay-fresh bags include six or 20 Whirl-Ease Honeys.

Include everyone at the table with gluten-free, agave sweetened shortbread cookies by Pamela’s Bakery.

Don’t have teacups? Mix and match cups and tableware from a local garage sale or Goodwill store.

Work It, Mama!

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 21:52:00 GMT

Would Someone Please Just Call Me Super Mom? (3.8.10)

I had this exact thought while stuffing the comforter into our duvet, after washing our sheets, vacuuming the downstairs, fulfilling my yoga practice and working several billable hours, all in the time frame of having sent my husband to the Museum of Science with our daughter for the morning. Beforehand, I reserved passes from our local library, made sure he had a backpack of snacks and relayed the best spots to hit. And I even put her down for her nap.

Want to hear more data from my Scorecard? OK, my pleasure. I make 95 percent of Maxine’s lunches, arrange 100 percent of her medical needs, 100 percent of her activities, 90 percent of the childcare, 90 percent of school drop-offs and pick-ups and 25 percent of her nighttime rituals. I do 50 percent of the dishes, 95 percent of the grocery shopping, 99 percent of the laundry, 99 percent of the regular cleaning, 100 percent of the thank-you cards, 99 percent of the social planning and 5 percent of the cooking. Plus, I make 10 percent of the income these days (on average).

I am beyond even-steven. I understand life is not fair. I have surrendered, except during my cycle, to domestic life with a child. All I’d like is a little appreciation. I thought this was a man’s thing, needing to feel appreciated. I don’t need it exaggerated. I don’t even really need it. I’d simply like it, to keep the resentment at bay. A once-a-day acknowledgment would do it. Twice a day would soften my skin and three times would get me in the sack.

However, since I cannot legislate what my partner says and does, and does not say or do, I vow to:

Cease complaining about not getting acknowledged
Ask for it if I really need it
Let it go if I don’t
Acknowledge myself
Keep doing my best

Notice today what you might need in the way of acknowledgment. One way to search for this is noticing where you may be feeling some resentment or the beginning of it. While our expectations of our partners — or of anything or of anyone — can cause suffering, we can self-empathize, self-care and self-love. In order to do this, we need to shift our complaints to requests, let it go, turn to ourselves (or a friend) for what we need, and keep on being what we are that gives us appreciation for ourselves.

Work It, Mama! is a place to come for inspiration as a working mama. It is chock full of tools, techniques, ideas, reflections, interviews and concrete practices to support your personhood — your whole and sufficient self — as you do the seemingly impossible job of being a working mom. And we'll do it in community, appreciating each other's choices, and supporting each other's aspirations. Remember, all moms are working moms.

Shea Adelson, mama to Maxine, is a contributing writer at Mindful Mama and a life and leadership coach with Seven Stones Leadership.

Hey Mama, What's Your Mindfulness Practice? (3.1.10)

We (working moms) need some time to quiet ourselves. Life is hectic in "the jungle of the juggle." We are balancing so many opposing needs all the time, responding in the moment to unpredictable events (ever had a sick child with a full day scheduled?) — all while planning for our family's future. Being quiet — or meditating — amongst the noise of family life is not typically something we think of as necessary to being a good or better mom. However, it really is like exercise, in the way that we should take a stand for our hearts to be healthy and our bodies (and minds) to feel good. Like exercise, meditation is proven to relax the mind, reduce tension and suppress the release of stress hormones that can cause illness. Plus, a cranky, stressed out mom, means a cranky, stressed out family.

What do you do to nurture a relaxed state of mind?

Hopefully your answer is: "All kinds of things!" If it's not, here's a practical guide to creating some necessary down time for a quiet mind, and wellbeing as a mom, wife and working woman.

1. Just sit. True relaxation is not necessarily happy hour or movie night (though those are certainly great ways to unwind!). What I am talking about here is meditation — allowing your mind to soften and rest back away from the inevitable thoughts and feelings that flow through us. Experiencing quiet in the mind is sometimes called the ground of being. From this place of quiet, solutions to a problem you had not recognized before become clear, possibilities open, and sometimes — in time — that wrinkle between your eyebrows becomes slightly less visible.

We allow this state to arise by creating the context for our minds to grow still and calm through stillness of the body, and so, we just sit. While we sit, we use our mind as a witness to simply notice our sensations, internally and externally. Sitting is the easiest, most well-known form of meditation; it keeps us from falling asleep on our backs or managing our routes if we are walking. Sitting is simple, especially if we ...

2. ... Make it easy. When trying to make time to do nothing, we are often confronted by all the things we have to do. Merely mentioning to the mind that it will become quiet activates it to remind us of all the lists, the promises and the obligations we have, and it will resist. If we are new to quieting the mind, we have to invoke a bit of discipline in setting up structure and an environment friendly to quieting. For us to move through the resistance, it is best to make it really, really easy to sit down.

Look around you right now. Where is a good place to sit quietly, eyes open and soft or closed? You want it to be a safe place, comfortable, warm, and supporting to any physical needs you might have.

Next, scan your daily schedule. What is a good time each day to set aside one to 10 minutes? You want it to be a time that comes easily, so you can sustain it over time. I am not a morning person, but if you naturally arise before your children, this could be a great time and is considered auspicious by many meditation teachers. I find quiet during my child's naptime. But because the family routine is ever-changing ...

... Consider this an experiment. That way, you can try different times and places out and gently discover the best time for you in your current situation.

3. Start out slow and short. The first time I attempted a practice of sitting quietly, the advice was to do it for one minute each day for a week, and to slowly build from there. I am embarrassed to admit that that first minute was excruciating. I sat at the end of my bed and folded my hands and, well, just sat. It was uncomfortable. It was new. Though redundant, this is another good time to remind you to be gentle and experimental. Like a new exercise routine or eating habit, starting a meditation practice has its ups and downs, ebbs and flows. Be kind when you skip a day and simply start afresh.

4. Use props. A timer is handy. Set it for the time you wish to sit (remembering less is more, especially at first), close your eyes and when it rings, get up. Simple! Lighting a candle or incense, ringing a bell or floating a flower are ways to create sacred space. These rituals invite the mood for meditation into your fast-paced day and say to the brain, slow down and listen.

5. Work with a teacher. I have found working with a meditation educator vastly helpful. In fact, it wasn't until I linked into the work of Karen Kyaha Abrams that I could really claim to have a strong meditation practice. There are many approaches to quieting the mind and developing a spiritual practice, and having someone to help navigate this terrain is an effective investment in our overall wellbeing as moms. While I had some success in sitting on and off over many years using the suggestions above, working with a teacher is what grounded me in a life practice.

6. Get a buddy. If finding (or I might say, attracting) a teacher is not desirable at this time, consider connecting with a friend and using each other for support. There was a time when my best friend and I would make phone dates. We'd call each other up, say hi, put the phone down, sit for 10 minutes, and then say good-bye and hang up. Having some amount of accountability, in the same way that a walking or gym buddy functions, can create some momentum — especially in the beginning.

The bottom line is to keep it simple and do it. Research shows that meditating regularly for shorter times is better than binge meditating (for long periods at a time) and then not meditating at all. Those short moments of quiet will — like a ringing bell — expand into the rest of your day and offer a sweet internal oasis in the middle of your crazy juggle jungle.

Confession of a Guilty Mom (#1) (2.22.10)

"Guilty Moms are a dime a dozen." My friend said it well, but I really had no idea of all the ways in which I was feeling guilty (one of the top "Weapons of Scarcity" I use on myself regularly), until I started looking at my life. Take the trip we are going on that involves a six-hour drive (one way). I am anxious for my 3-year-old to be in the car for that long. Though I was given lots of advice on how to entertain her, I was loathing the preparation: find a DVD player to borrow, collect some DVDs, go to Target's dollar area for cheap and new-to-her toys, make some puppets and other homemade activities. I had a deadline this week and wasn't willing to spend my downtime crafting. I didn't want to spend the money; didn't want to have TV in the car. I just didn't want to deal.

But two days before we left, with most options no longer viable, my folly began to dawn on me like milk slowly spoiling in the back of the fridge. Was I crazy? Six hours, no preparation? I don't have a lot of evidence for my child being difficult on long rides, but only because we don't take any. I knew that I had to do something and that something I did was Target.

I have a habit of pretending I am an anthropologist visiting a foreign culture when I engage in some pop cultural ritual that I am ambivalent about, such as watching CBS Monday night comedy shows or buying cheap products at big box stores. I realize that Target provides jobs here and abroad (sometimes uplifting women and their families out of abject poverty), but I am vastly ambivalent about the overall value of this business model. I know deep down that when I step in there for something I could buy for a couple of dollars more at a local hardware store or children's boutique, I am not aligned with my core values.

Why did I do it? I felt desperate. I felt afraid. I became worried that we would have a terrible drive without some new stuff to ward off Maxine's boredom. That we would be trapped in the car together, angry and fuming and late for where we needed to be. That my fire-breathing dragon mama would unleash her wrath in frustration and, in turn, ruin the trip. Mild hyperbole, but a LOT of scarcity running the show and a whole cultural conversation backstage.

I will admit that being in Target the night before Valentine's Day was rather festive. I felt I was participating in a modern American past time: the consumption of cheap goods. I understand this activity because it feels good. It's fun to find little treasures I can afford in the stacked bins, fill up my bag and walk out with the (perceived) security of a peaceful drive. It was easy and convenient. I was grateful for that.

A piece of me (where my actions trampled on my values) feels guilty, however. I felt a bit queasy in the store under the slight high of finding what I thought was protecting me. I felt a weird sense of pride combined with repulsion for my Americanism and the way I was expressing it. I've been left wondering, how does one be a mindful working mama? How do we stay aligned to our values, our ideals, when we feel depleted of time and creative energy, when the easier route is not only available but is celebrated by a society hungry to keep the economy humming?

One thing I know is that I have some work to do on trusting myself (I always have a choice not to lose my temper), trusting my child (she always has 10 fingers to count and shoes to take on and off), trusting my community (to ask for help) and going with the flow (so what if we arrive late?). Trust is an action of sufficiency. For now, I will stand in the inquiry of how rigorous I should really be about Target and its peers when it's a priority to flow my resources to local shops. And in the meantime, I will shake off the guilt.

Epilogue:

We are back from our trip. While the dollar clipboard was great for drawing, Maxine was mostly unimpressed with my other purchases. The stamps didn't work, the dry erase board fell apart, and so did the markers. What did I expect for a buck? The miracles came in ways I could never have controlled: her folding up my scarf to make a pillow for a long nap each way, rocking out to her CDs, eating snacks and playing with toys I brought from home. When it comes to scarcity, FDR has it right: "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself."

Can We Have It All? (2.15.10)

This week, I discovered that I am in a committed relationship with my work. I had canceled a social date for the third time, and was emailing things like: “I need to pause on making plans until I catch up on my rest (I mean work), yes, my rest…” That’s when it hit me. Then it really became obvious when I realized how behind I am on watching “Project Runway.” It’s been a slow transition (one bathroom necessity at a time), but here I am, all moved into — not my new boyfriend’s house — but my desk.

Felicity Huffman, well-known actress and mother of two, once caused Leslie Stahl’s eyebrows to lift in a “60 Minutes” interview when she was asked if mothering was the best experience of her life. Her response: “No, no, and I resent that question.” Quite the bold statement for a woman to make on primetime television. When I watched this story three years ago (having just miscarried), I nearly leapt off my couch with passionate recognition of the truth: A mother gives a taboo — though honest — answer to a population dominated by images and ideals of motherhood being wholly satisfying, never mind the fairytale story floating around — it’s beautiful, easy, joyful and natural.

In reality, moms — women — also enjoy birthing and raising movements, businesses, projects and art. “Duh,” you say. But heed what Nina Utne, mother of two and editor of the progressive and illuminating Utne Reader, told a friend of mine at a woman’s leadership roundtable event: “We can’t have it all. It’s impossible.”

Are working moms disillusioned? Am I? Can I actually meet all of the expectations in all areas of my life? Can I keep my family well nourished on home-cooked food? Can I raise well-adjusted child(ren) who will be prepared for adulthood when it’s time? Can I have an amazing sex life and connection with my partner? How about a career that forwards my deepest ideals? And the well-tended friendships I cherish? My aging parents well-cared for? The rest, the recreation, the restoration of nothingness, and deep practice that my mind and body need?

I have no idea. I am only just now committing to my work in a significant way, taking it to the next level. Let’s say I am betrothed to my work and also want to grow my family of three to four. Is that too much to ask? I think the answers have something to do with the help we have around us: supportive partners and grandparents, or lots and lots of financial resources. In a very critical way, this is a socioeconomic inquiry, which is not lost of me.

Felicity Huffman wasn’t sure she was a good mother. We all have insecurities, and working and having a career outside of parenting has nothing to do with that. Nina Utne was clear that we can’t have it all, at the same time. We need to make choices and live life in stages. I hear the wisdom in this, but I already know that I will try otherwise.

You Know You Are a Working Mom When … (2.8.10)

Back when I was a new mom — which meant I was exhausted and drained — I would drive by my own street when headed home. My friend, a new mom herself, and I began the running joke: “You know you are a new mom when … you drive by your own street on the way home.” Another day, another voicemail: “You know you are a new mom when … you leave the house without an extra set of clothes and your baby has a poop blow-out up the back — at the beginning of your much-needed, long-awaited hair appointment.”

Because it was so much fun (and relieving) to go back and forth with my friend, I decided to revive this game. Because it takes a village, and every working mom has her own unique experience, schedule, arrangement, and relationship with her family, I went to my awesome community of moms and asked for their help.

The request? Finish this sentence: “You know you are a working mom when …”

I must have struck a nerve, because for two days, more than 40 moms replied. It turns out we are all having very similar experiences (go figure!).

What do we share? Work is more of a vacation than family or school vacation. A medical or waxing appointment is a coveted opportunity for rest and reflection. Embarrassing moments occur when uncovering what lies at the bottom of your purse. No more sick days. Many a standards have been, and will be, broken.

You know you are a working mom when…

You are an inspiration to your kids:

... You come downstairs dressed for an important meeting and your kids say: “Oh Mommy, you look so nice! I didn’t know you had THOSE clothes.”
... Your 2-year-old throws a bag over her shoulder and declares “Mommy's work bag!” as she heads for the door.
... You can master any obstacle course in heels.
... You're child refuses to do what she's told and offers as her excuse, "I just have to send one more email." (On the play computer, of course.)

You are an inspiration to your workmates:

... You enjoy making your male colleagues squirm when you tell them about “that bag you always carry around but don’t open.” (The pump.)
... You reach into your suit pocket at a meeting and pull out a pair of Dora the Explorer underpants.

The line between working and mothering is thin:

... You clean your desk and it involves scraping off play dough.
... You find yourself humming "The Wheels on the Bus" alone in your car.
... In selecting a pediatric dentist, you factor in that one has WiFi and massage chairs while the other has a good toy selection in the waiting area.
... A missed nap is half a workday lost.

Work is considered a break:

... Going back to work after a vacation is MORE of a vacation.
... There's no such thing as a sick day. Ever. No matter how crummy you feel.
... Your kids are sleeping, you’re drinking a cup of coffee while working, and it feels like the best vacation ever.

You are resourceful:

... You zip your kids into a tent so you can check email.
... You finish your makeup in the rearview mirror.
... You sneak a cookie with you to the computer, and hope the kid napping on the couch behind you is really asleep.
... You hide in the shower to talk to your boss because it’s the only place your 5-year-old won’t find you and ask you to turn on the Wii for the 90th time that afternoon.

You have no choice but to get help:

... Peapod (grocery delivery service) is your new best friend.
... You’re willing to pay your nanny that extra half hour of time in the morning so you can shower alone.
... The happiest moment of the week is coming home after the cleaning professionals have visited.

You take multi-tasking to a new level:

... You pump breast milk while driving to work. (Mom Tip: This requires a healthy supply of AAA batteries!)
... You are that mom on her cell phone at the bus stop.
... You strap on the baby for a nap, hop on the elliptical, and catch up on some work reading.
... You simultaneously: listen to an after-hours conference call (speaker phone on mute), bake brownies with your 2-year-old and cook dinner.
... Your daughter takes her first steps on your “day off,” in your office, while you’re on a conference call.
... You have your older kids do their homework in the car while dropping off the younger ones at daycare.

You get creative about time:

... You answer all your emails and do half your day’s work after 10 p.m.
... Your best working hours are from 5 a.m. to 7 a.m.
... You don't have the time, patience or energy to listen to any voicemail message longer than 30 seconds.
... You stay out late just to give your babysitter a minimum amount of hours, even if you’re falling asleep at the bookstore.

You are protective of your “you” time, however you get it:

... You ask the receptionist in the doctor's office to skip over you while you read a magazine.
... You are glad for your bellybutton hernia operation (a result of pregnancy). So glad you say to the anesthesiologist: "I'm so excited for the nap!”
... You feel grateful to attend a funeral because you get to sit quietly in church for two hours.
... Sitting in the dentist chair is the most peace you’ve had all day.
... Waxing feels like a good time to close your eyes and relax.
... Going to the grocery store alone feels like a nourishing “me” date.
... Driving to work is nirvana.
... You're looking forward to the labor and delivery of your second baby — as a way to get two full nights worth of sleep in the hospital, plus meals delivered.

Sex is elusive:

... Your husband sees you wearing sexy underwear and comments that it must be laundry day.
... Your “up all night” experience no longer refers to a really crazy, sexy experience, but a long night of keeping a fever down, finding a special blankie in the dark, or cleaning up pee.
... Any sex is good sex.
... Your perfect “date night” involves snuggling with your partner... for eight hours of uninterrupted sleep!
... You spend “date night” waxing your legs in front of a “Sex and the City” rerun.
... You get excited to take yourself on an online date to buy new clothes at 11 p.m. while sitting at your desk.
... You have boxes of clothes to return in your basement from your late-night online shopping dates.

You let go of standards:

... Cheese and crackers seems like a perfectly well-balanced meal for the family.
... You take an a.m. conference call in your old maternity sweats (because, shoot, they are so darn comfy!), your shirt is covered in your 2-year-old's snot (because he prefers your shoulder to a tissue), a shower is on the to-do list (you can always wear a ponytail again, right?), and your trusty breast pump is fired up and ready to go as soon as you get off the phone!
... You have a deadline to meet and wished your 9-month-old liked to watch TV.
... “Dry Clean Only” garments are banned from your house.
... You're bribing your 2-year-old with french fries, in order to get her to eat some protein: deep-fried, previously frozen chicken nuggets. Then you offer her an alternative of pizza.

You let go of your life before children:

... Crawling into bed at 7:30 on a Saturday night seems perfectly reasonable.
... You find your child's half-eaten granola bar in your coat pocket.
... You fiddle with your baby’s binky you walked out of the house with while having a serious work conversation.
... Poop in the bathtub is the least of your problems. (Mom aside: “Seriously, that was my day today.”)
... “School break” no longer means “vacation.”

You are grateful for what you do have:

... The priceless artwork in your office consists of handprints and stick figures.
... You consider 7:30 to be "sleeping in" on a Sunday.
... You reach into your bag for your wallet and pull out a snack-trap filled with cheerios instead.

You are prepared:

... You tote a bag with your work computer in the car at all times, in case of spontaneous naps hopeful for some productivity.
... You work on this article at Whole Foods between grocery shopping and teaching a yoga class, without even taking your jacket off.

You know you are a working mom when you can laugh at yourself. What a gift to receive all these contributions and to share in the humor (sometimes dark) of juggling the many hats we wear as moms. I deeply appreciate those who contributed their working mom moments and would love to hear from you, too! Tell me about it: shea@sevenstonesleadership.com.

Enough of This! Parenting from Scarcity (2.1.10)

How often do you say (out loud or in your head):

“I wish the day was four hours longer?"
"I wish I had more time for myself."
“I wish my child didn’t ask so many questions, or wasn’t so loud/demanding?”
“I wish my child wouldn’t do that, be different, or more like that other kid?”

Parenting can be frustrating, especially in the realm of time, and especially when you are juggling a workload.

This week as I practiced yoga, I listened to my mind chattering away about all the work I had to do. I thought, “If only I could replicate myself.” My 'scarcity radar' picked it up, and gently moved my mind forward, but another thought rolled in: “If only I could extend the day a bit.” Radar engaged again, and my attention backed away from the thought, but then, quickly, another one: “This parenting job takes up so much time.”

Enough! I asked myself: “Why is it I feel the need to be so productive? What is that compulsion? What will happen if I don’t complete everything on my list?” From that inquiry, and probably the power of being in a challenging yoga pose, I softened into the opening of what is. The present moment, the crystal clear knowing that I was enough right now, and always was and always will be, no matter what I check off my list. This was a moment of grace — and I was grateful for it — because I have an infinite trough of scarcity stories — about time, money, food, sex, love, sleep, resources, knowledge, time. Time is the big one for me. There’s never enough, it seems.

What is it for you?

Take a moment to evaluate. Notice what occurs in your relationships and through the varying domains in your life. Where do you hear the words “never enough” in your relationship to:

Your body (health, fitness, food)?
Your self (realm of being, thinking, feeling, behaviors)?
Money?
Time?
Sex?
Relationships (parenting, intimacy, friends, family of origin)?
Contribution/purpose?
Work/career/job?
Spirituality (religion, nature, God, higher power, mindfulness practices)?
Recreation (leisure, creativity, hobbies)?

How you relate to these domains in your life will effect how you parent.

Distracted over work? Feeling deficient in your marriage? Angry that grandma doesn't abide by your requests? Our children can sense what’s happening in our worlds and our feelings. Unless we become deeply aware of them and conscious of their flow, they will indeed influence our behavior. Evaluate which domains you feel are sufficient, which are lacking, where the complaints lie and where there are celebrations. Now, consider the story you have about your kid(s)? And separately, how do you feel about yourself as a parent?

Are you enough as you are? Tell me about it: shea@sevenstonesleadership.com.

All Moms Are Working Moms (1.25.10)

I knew this to be true before I saw the bumper sticker, but I sure liked seeing it in black and white on a moving minivan, being driven by a dad no less. Now, having been on both sides of the “Mommy War,” it is absolutely clear to me that all moms work, whether they get paid in currency or not. It’s too complex to ever know what arrangement (of many possibilities) is more challenging or more rewarding. Which is harder? Finding good childcare and dealing with preparing lunches, dropping off, picking up on time, making sure an extra set of clothes is available, dealing with sick days, transitioning from office to home, plus the complex emotionality — the grief, guilt and ambivalence — to attend to about not being with your child(ren) all day long and feeling like you can’t do anything well, or being “on” with your child all day, being tugged at, demanded upon, coming up with fun activities to entertain and educate that also appeal to your sensitivities, so you are both stimulated and not terribly bored, plus dealing with all of the complex emotionality — the grief, guilt and ambivalence — to attend to about not building a career and expressing all of that intelligence and passion that you have for ideas outside of mothering?

Who’s to say? We each are, for ourselves. Putting down the scorecard, I know that being a mom is laborious, no matter if you have one or three, nanny or no nanny, paid work outside the home or unpaid work inside the home. The emotions are the same. The tensions are all real. We can indeed relate to each other. If that bumper sticker had actually said "Go Cougars!" I might have started to think the same thoughts. Don’t many of us moms feel like we have to be a sexy cougar in bed, a witty cougar at the office, a wise cougar to her friend, a patient cougar with grandma, a creative cougar to get her pups to brush their teeth, get dressed, buckle up, wash up for dinner, or to do just about anything? We need each other, to talk about these things, to share what works and what doesn't.

Work It, Mama! will be a place to come for inspiration as a working mama. It will be chock full of tools, techniques, ideas, reflections, interviews and concrete practices to support your personhood — your whole and sufficient self – as you do the seemingly impossible job of being a working mom. We'll do it in community, appreciating each other's choices, and supporting each other's aspirations. Welcome!

Get Crafty!

Sarah Kraft — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 21:19:00 GMT

For all of the artsy, creative mamas, Abby Pecoriello’s “Crafty Mama: Makes 49 Fast, Fabulous, Foolproof (Baby & Toddler) Projects” is a must-have boredom buster! Set up your own Crafty Mama group (with or without the kiddos), and construct a unique photo puzzle, brag book, fringe blanket, chalkboard placemat and much more. Pecoriello provides fun, hip projects for crafters of all skill levels (most of which can be completed during a toddler’s nap). Offering practical tips on editing digital photos, creating jewelry, and mastering the art of iron-on transfers, “Crafty Mama” will inspire the timid and give the skilled nearly a year’s worth of one-of-a-kind projects. Fire up the glue gun!

A Word on Haiti

Sarah Kraft — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 22:38:00 GMT

Just as we all hunkered down to live out our new years resolutions, Haiti was rocked by a devastating earthquake. Newsreels of seasonal cheer have been replaced by reports of great suffering, and we all hold our breaths as the death toll mounts. For my husband and I, who spent 6 months working with Haitian orphans in 2003, the news has come especially hard. How is it possible for one little country to face so many struggles - from political coups to TB to flooding and earthquakes? What can we do to make a difference for the Haitians who we know and love?

Of course, we should all give money to support the rebuilding and recovery process - whether $5 or $5,000. I donated to Yele Haiti, founded in 2005 by musician Wyclef Jean, who is a native of Haiti and is on the ground in Port-au-Prince right now. I invite you to donate to Yele Haiti, too. Simply text "Yele" to 501501 on your cell phone, which will automatically donate $5 to the Yele Haiti Earthquake Fund (added to your cell phone bill), or visit this link to make a larger donation: http://www.yele.org/

But what else? As Mindful Mamas, let's face this tragedy as an opportunity for dialogue and action inside of our families and local communities - creatively and proactively. Last night, we took our 5-year-old daughter to dinner, explained the science of earthquakes, and then shared the story of Haiti. We decided together that we could easily collect clothing and food donations from her classmates for children in Haiti. Emma, who loves art, is creating a flyer to distribute at her school. We want her to know that she can make a difference in the world and are proud of her leadership. We are facing the giant together and we're talking about it.

Please share your stories, concerns, and actions related to Haiti in the comment box below. Together, we can truly make a difference for the children, mothers and fathers of Haiti.

Lessons Learned: H1N1

Sarah Kraft — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 02:32:00 GMT

When it comes to H1N1, most of us have primarily heard about pandemic, death, and the short supply and high demand of the vaccine. In return, most of us have probably had a panic-induced moment or two when making the decision to vaccinate our children or not.

We all know that the virus continues to spread and is affecting primarily the pediatric population more than the seasonal flu. Thus, the mortality rates for children have gone up. On a larger scale, the influenza death rate, as compared to all causes of mortality, is lower than congenital diseases, malignancies, assault and heart disease for those less than 4 years old, and you can add accidents and suicide for older children (ages 5 and up). In retrospect, H1N1 has turned out to be less of a problem than most predicted or imagined.

More factors than simply vaccinating go into the risk your child has for any number of diseases. Before making any decisions, you may want to take a look at the following:

How one reacts to a vaccine or virus depends on their ability to mount proper immune reactions. That can be altered by diet, mood, etc. The Standard American Diet is aptly termed SAD, as it is high in sugar, low in fiber and nutrient poor. Simple sugar alone has been found to lower white blood cell counts up to 50 percent two hours after ingestion. Is your child eating a healthy, whole foods diet rich in the colors of the rainbow, or are they eating the brown: macaroni and cheese, pizza and noodles?
Does your child still have a thymus, appendix, tonsils and spleen? Do they get sick often?
Many children have immune reactions to foods, which when properly tested are the most common foods in our diet (gluten, wheat, soy, dairy and chicken eggs). Premature deliveries, as well as formula-fed babies are more likely to have a decreased response, as they are more prone to have food allergies and a “leaky gut,” indicating first defense systems of the skin, lungs and gut are suboptimal and immune resources are diverted to other tasks.
Is your house calm and fun, or is it stressful and chaotic? Stress can cause impaired immune responses to vaccines and to viruses. Positive mood, stress reduction techniques, humor, laughter and guided imagery can overcome stress.

Let’s all learn a lesson from the H1N1 scare. Many of our children haven’t been vaccinated, haven’t contracted the virus, and are completely healthy. I invite you to put aside the fear, look at the whole picture with a balanced eye and an inner knowing, and make your choice regarding vaccinations. It is through empowerment that we make the best decisions for ourselves and for our children, and with our conviction to see it through, no matter the outcome.

Immunity Boost

Sarah Kraft — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 02:03:00 GMT

Heading back to school, daycare and work after winter break means diving back into cold and flu season. Protecting and enhancing your family’s immunity is essential in the fight against germs and missed days of school. Following are three of the latest trends and one old-fashioned favorite for boosting immunity and minimizing illness.

Vitamin D

Research shows that vitamin D is crucial to the optimal functioning of many body systems, including the immune system. Those consuming adequate amounts of vitamin D are less likely to get colds and flu viruses, especially in the winter months.

A recent study showed that nearly 70 percent of children have suboptimal levels of vitamin D, mostly due to decreased time spent outside paired with increased sunscreen use. The American Academy of Pediatrics has recently doubled their daily recommendation for vitamin D from 200 IU/day to 400 IU/day. Dr. Caitlin O’Conner usually advises an even higher level of supplementation, depending on individual needs. To determine the proper amount to supplement, have a practitioner evaluate vitamin D levels with a blood test. Visit the Vitamin D Council (vitamindcouncil.org) Web site for more information.

Nasal Irrigation

Nasal irrigation has been around for thousands of years. Recently, modern science has caught up with ancient practice — several clinical studies have proven that nasal irrigation with saline is an effective treatment for sinusitis and other types of respiratory infections. Many viruses that cause winter colds and flues enter the body and set up shop in the nasal mucosa, so it only makes sense to try to wash them away, according to Dr. O'Conner. Keeping airways warm and moist is also a great way to optimize their ability to fight germs. There are many options to choose from, including the traditional neti pot or the more modern alternatives available at most drugstores.

Colostrum

A recent study compared people taking colostrum alone, those taking colostrum who received the flu vaccine, and those who had only received the flu vaccine. Those who took colostrum reported less incidence of the flu, regardless of whether or not they had the flu vaccine. When looking for colostrum, Dr. O’Conner recommends doing research to ensure that it’s pure and ethically produced.

Hand Washing

About 80 percent of infectious diseases are spread through contact with infected surfaces or people, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Getting kids into the habit of cleansing hands with soap and water, or a non-alcohol hand sanitizer, can significantly minimize the incidence of colds and flues.

According to Kim Walls, creator of the Epicuren Baby and Episencial skin care products and philosophy, the most important times for children to wash hands are before they eat, after going to the bathroom, after school and before bed. This presents at least eight opportunities each day to teach the importance of maintaining proper hygiene for good health.

Every time kids wash their hands, they should follow this three-step system.

Get hands wet, then add soap.
Scrub all over, not just the palms. The tops of hands, wrists and between fingers are prime areas that house bacteria or viruses, but are often neglected.
Rinse and dry, but keep the towel in hand to turn off the water and open the door. Not everyone’s kids will be as smart about health as yours!

Holistic Teething Remedies

Sarah Kraft — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 00:27:00 GMT

Blamed for everything from nursing marathons to night waking, teething isn’t just difficult for baby; it’s hard on the whole family. Though a necessary and inevitable right of passage, teething is one of early life’s toughest experiences. Indeed, the thought of bone cutting through tender gums even makes most adults cringe. Babies seem to take it all in relative stride, drooling and chewing for weeks to help the little chompers pop through. Nevertheless, pain and inflammation can cause even the mellowest of infants to become fussy and irritable, and others to be downright inconsolable.

If you’re reluctant to reach for baby painkillers or benzocaine-based analgesics, the good news is that there are countless holistic remedies to help your wee one cope with cutting teeth. The bad news is, you’ll be reaching for them again and again for the first two or three years of your child’s life.

Homeopathies & Herbs

Homeopathic remedies are an excellent choice for soothing teething pain. They are available either as single remedies or in blends for specific conditions, like teething or colic. Though traditional homeopaths generally favor single remedies, blends are handy for busy mamas who may not have time to determine which individual remedy works best for her child. Hyland’s Teething Tablets and Boiron’s Camilia are favorites.

The family-friendly guide, "Homeopathic Self-Care" suggests these tried and true individual remedies for teething pain:

Chamomilla: For babies who are inconsolable during teething. They scream, kick and throw tantrums. They are soothed by being rocked or carried.
Calcarea Carbonica: For chubby babies who are generally content but are slow to teethe. They tend to sweat a lot through the back of their heads during sleep.
Calcarea Phosphorica: For fussy, discontented children who seem to want to be elsewhere.
Silica: For a baby with delicate features, who has difficulty teething, or is slow to teethe and is prone to constipation.

According to authors Robert Ullman, N.D. and Judyth Reichenberg-Ullman, N.D., dosage for all remedies (30C potency) is three pellets every 15 minutes for two to four hours, depending on the severity of the symptoms, until you see improvement. If there is no improvement, another remedy should be tried. When symptoms begin to subside, only repeat the dose if symptoms return. Thankfully, homeopathy is often quickly effective, especially in small children.

Herbal oils are another choice for easing teething pain. Herbs for Kids’ Gum-omile is a topical oil containing the soothing extracts of chamomile and willow bark, as well as the numbing properties of clove essential oil in a base of almond oil ($10.59). The oil is applied topically, as needed for teething pain. Because clove oil can be strong, test this on yourself first. If it seems too powerful, dilute it with olive or other vegetable oil.

DIY

Necessity is truly the mother of invention. If teething strikes and you don’t have any herbs or homeopathies on hand, never fear. Chances are, you have plenty of options to soothe your babe. My 7-month-old loves nothing more than a cold, wet washcloth to suck on. Other possibilities include a cool baby bottle of water, diluted juice or chamomile tea. Chilled carrots or frozen bananas make great impromptu teethers — especially before the first teeth emerge — and semi-frozen breast milk or formula (slushy-style) is a welcome treat to tender gums. Use common-sense caution when giving teething tots solid foods of any sort, particularly those that could present a choking hazard, and of course, read the labels of any teething biscuits with care. Some are loaded with ingredients — like sugar and preservatives — that aren’t optimal for infants.

Teethers

Babies love to chew, so safe, BPA-free plastic or all-natural rubber toys are helpful to have available for them to sink their gums into. Fortunately, today’s mamas are blessed to have some fabulous nontoxic options.

Vulli’s Sophie the Giraffe is a classic. Crafted from all-natural rubber and food paint, Sophie has a sweet face, a charming squeak and gently curved legs that are just right for teething ($18.49).

Of all the “chillable” teething toys on the market, my daughter’s hands-down favorite is the Chill-It Fish Teether from Natursutten. Made from nontoxic EVA plastic (free of BPA, PVC and phthalate), it is just the right size for her small hands ($11.75).

For babies on the go, DANO2’s Circus Ring Teethers offers three colorful teething rings made from FDA compliant, medical-grade plastic in a compact and keep-it-clean case. Each set includes a flexible monkey ring, a firm seal ring and a rigid lion ring, providing just the right texture for every stage of teething. In our house, this set is as indispensable as diapers in the diaper bag. We don’t leave home without it!

Handling Criticism About Your Child’s Diet

Sarah Kraft — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 22:41:00 GMT

Information abounds about children’s food allergies and healthy eating — the nuts and bolts of what to feed your child and how to get your kid to eat or not to eat something. Rarely, however, do we hear about what it’s like for moms to deal with their choices or the necessity of prohibiting certain foods due to allergy within the scope of their relationships. We are affected by the reactions of people in our lives, so how do we handle it when we’re judged? How do we protect ourselves from constant feedback or passive comments about our choices? Whether your child has a severe nut allergy or you insist corn chips come after the salad, the moms we’ve talked to have a lot to say about handling input about their child’s diet.

Not just lifestyle, it’s life threatening

Patience, Preparation, Persistence. There’s no doubt about it: if your child has the potential go into anaphylactic shock from eating a raisin that touched a cashew, you’d be aggravated at that mom who brought the mixed snack to the museum. I’m that mom, and though my friend didn’t stop talking to me for two months like she did when another mom friend defended her PB&J picnic at the beach after years of knowing the hazards, it was probably just because I groveled with shame for my thoughtlessness. Later she told me, “It just bothers me when people feel inconvenienced. No one understands unless they, too, are the front lines for their child. It’s a lot of work to be so hypervigilant.” That’s what moms of kids with severe food allergies want you to know.

While its rare that a family dealing with a restricted diet due to allergies will get outwardly criticized, moms say they hate feeling like a burden. To handle those bad feelings requires a lot of patience, preparation, and good and persistent communication. Have a ready stash of safe alternatives for those tricky moments like birthday celebrations, so you can pack the nut-and-dairy-free cupcake to avoid your child feeling left out of the fun. Offering some information for friends and family who are ignorant about the consequences of feeding an allergy food to your child is critical. But waiting for them to remember and adapt just takes patience.

When sugar strikes, have a mission. Sugar might be the new tobacco, and it’s just about as contentious. Just ask MeMe Roth, the President and Founder of National Action Against Obesity. Roth, who has been called a radical anti-sugar fundamentalist by nutritionists who take a more moderate stance on the debate, insists that sugar is the culprit for the demise of Americans’ health, and takes a lot of heat for her stance. How does she handle the criticism? She remembers why she’s doing it. Though involved in a national debate, the campaign is personal for her as a child of obese parents and a mother of two children. “I’ve had front row seats to what obesity does to a family,” she says. It is crystal clear to her that habitual sugar intake is harmful, yes harmful, to children, and she is steadfast in her commitment to limit sugar in places where children spend time, such as schools, and to educate parents of their job to teach children healthy eating habits. And while the pointing and name-calling can get to her sometimes, humor, purpose and passion keep her going.

Criticism harsher around lifestyle diets

Do you really have an allergy? I feel a bit like a poser. When I ask about the gluten content in menu items and the waitstaff asks the leading question, “So you have a gluten allergy?” I am compelled to explain. “Well, not really,” I start. “It’s just that, see, it’s an intolerance of sorts. I was advised to eliminate it before I even knew it was a problem and when I cheat it seems like a problem …” Of course, I lose them at “Well.” They don’t care. The bottom line is that when people make a choice to restrict their diets for any reason other than a medical one, it can irk people. It puts them out. A restaurant will have to keep food items separate. Grandparents can’t show their love through cookies. Did you realize that you are depriving your child of the childhood experience of Friday Night Pizza?!

Tongue and cheek aside, it can be alienating to eat differently from the people around you. When friends, family or strangers get frustrated and discount any of the needs we have as parents around the food we feed our kids, we ourselves can feel frustrated, angry or hurt.

Get Dad on your team. Guys love the team concept, and it’s useful for us moms when we are committed to something and need all the support we can get. In particular, partners are key to any challenges with your in-laws around food, as important information might be more easily heard from him than from you. Is your partner supportive of your diet choices for the kid(s)? If yes, lucky you! If not, make the pitch for him to join your commitment. What are the best ways to share information and make requests to your partner? Would he/she appreciate some information, verbal or via e-mail or a written note? Work with what is best for your particular relationship dynamic.

A special tip: once on your side, let him have his own style of play. One mom recognizes that her husband will be more direct than she might be and that both approaches are effective. In the case of her mother-in-law offering the children ice cream, he said, “We don’t do that.” While she might redirect and say, “Ice cream? Hmmm… How about a yogurt instead?” And when his mother gets defensive, stay out of it.

Birds of a feather… Keeping with the team, or flock, metaphor, one mom said that choosing a sugar- and preservative-free diet for her daughters has shaped who she hangs out with. “We can’t be as close friends with other families who parent so differently,” she reflected. This was true for other moms, as well. My own playgroup handles several food allergies/sensitivities, and above all, has a simpatico approach to snacks and healthy food choices. This makes modeling sharing — putting out a bowl of sliced fruit or passing out rice cakes — easier, and the kids love to be eating the same things. For moms dealing with severe allergies, it is a relief to be around other moms and kids with the same allergies. “That means there are more eyes, more vigilance as to what the kids are eating,” says my friend. The responsibility is shared. The village mentality helps avoid criticism altogether. (See www.kidswithfoodallergies.org for more support.)

Brown-bag it. Being prepared is a key strategy to avoid the opportunity for criticism, as noted by many moms. Whether sending a “junk food container” to school with her child to take birthday cupcakes home or bringing a gluten- and wheat-free frozen pizza to a pizza party, anticipation can be a great way to reduce the chances for conflict with your child and causing upset for the hosting adults. When visiting family out of town, Coco Rosenblatt-Farrell, founder of Reclaiming Your Body and mom of an 11-year-old daughter, offers a care package of food she thinks her loved ones might also enjoy. Bringing food to share downplays the perception that her family is high maintenance and picky in spite of their restricted diet compared to her hosts’.

Roll with it. On the other hand, when the sugar-free mom gets hit with a surprise sugar attack, she goes with the flow and deals with the consequences. “I don’t want to be the Grinch,” she says, admitting she let her kids have a little Red #40 when freeze pops were passed out at a summer gathering. She remembers that a little high fructose corn syrup won’t cause imminent Type II Diabetes. Going with the flow is harder to do with stricter diets and impossible in cases of severe allergy situations, but the attitude of lightness can go a long way interpersonally.

Managing interpersonal relationships. Balancing our need to keep to our values with our need to get along can be tricky. If avoiding sticky situations doesn’t prevent us from feeling bad with another person, we must do some inner work and even some direct communication. Try these steps.

Trust and align with yourself. Leila Talore, founder of Skillful Relationships and mom of a toddler, laments the times she has reacted to criticism with defensiveness. When a friend passively judged her for putting jelly on her son’s toast, Leila ended up justifying herself, later working it out in her mind and with another friend that she is completely OK with her son eating jelly! Staying centered by trusting our choices and by offering ourselves empathy in the face of criticism’s sting is the beginning to good communication.

Don't justify or explain. Silent, inner approval is all you need, says parenting coach, Scott Noelle. In his The Daily Groove newsletter titled “Don’t Explain,” Scott recommends that beyond responding to someone’s expressed curiosity about your parenting choices by simply sharing information, “justifying gives away your power. It implies that you need the other person's approval.” He further declares that needing to explain and justify our choices is based on our need to be right. This automatically puts us in a right/wrong mode and leads us into interpersonal conflict.

Informing curiosity with facts, not fundamentalism. As a mom in a family that keeps a restricted diet compared to most families — free of gluten, sugar, dairy and corn-fed meats — Coco poses the question to family or friends who show some interest in her families’ diet choices by asking them, “Would it be helpful for you to know why we are making this choice?” Asking for permission allows the other person to know you are not going to ambush them with a righteous monologue in the name of educating them. If she hears a “Yes,” then she may say more or offer an article or book. She has a canned response to cover the issue in a general way, saying, “We eat mostly whole foods, processed as little as possible, to get the most nutrition out them.” If there is more specific interest in her choices she is happy to have that conversation.

Connect with your authentic love. As a communications teacher, Coco is “really sensitive to people who are making other choices than myself. Not to say or to think ‘we’re doing it right and you’re wrong.’” She connects with her love for her relatives, friends and even strangers who may feel put out by her family’s needs, and looks for the moments when there is room for some shared learning between them.

Criticism, whether passive or direct, is not easy to bear, but by finding and using community support, by recalling our purpose and intentions behind our choices, and by drawing up our inner resources, we can stay centered, keep it simple and feel good about our choices.

Shea Adelson is a contributing writer to Mindful-Mama, a trusted advisor to working moms and moms in transition, and magnificent mom to Maxine.

Do-Good Getaways

Sarah Kraft — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 20:26:00 GMT

For a family getaway that's truly a once-in-a-lifetime experience, think beyond the theme park and consider embarking on a volunteer vacation. Emphasizing exploration over escapism, volunteer vacations let you and your clan immerse yourselves in short-term service work that could prove endlessly rewarding. From tending vegetable gardens in Malawi to caring for injured wildlife in Argentina, each project offers the opportunity to create powerful and positive change during your travel time.

While many volunteer vacations take participants to far-flung destinations across the globe, other programs let you engage in efforts like restoring nature trails or helping out on an organic farm without going abroad. Varying in length from several days to several weeks, volunteer vacations can come at zero cost (apart from travel expenses) or charge more than $5,000 per person. No matter which type of program you choose, make sure to take these crucial steps before forging ahead with your voluntourism adventure:

Team up with family members to discuss which kind of volunteer work you want to pursue. Encourage everyone to talk about the issues of greatest concern to him or her, and aim to find an excursion that will be meaningful and rewarding for each person involved.
Check out guidebooks like Volunteer Vacations: Short-Term Adventures That Will Benefit You and Others by Bill McMillon, Doug Cutchins and Anne Geissinger and The 100 Best Volunteer Vacations to Enrich Your Life by Pam Grout to learn more about the opportunities available to you. Online resources like CharityGuide.org, VolunteerAbroad.com, and GlobalVolunteers.org can also give you the scoop on your potential vacation destinations.
Once you've begun to narrow down your possibilities, peruse each program's mission statement (especially if you want to avoid any politically- or religiously-affiliated organizations) and contact the staff directly with questions about your volunteer responsibilities, living conditions, expenses not covered under the vacation fee, or any other matters not covered on the program's Web site.
To get a stronger sense of the volunteer-vacation experience, use tools such as Google Blog Search to track down personal accounts from those who've already taken part in the program you're considering.

For a closer look at what's involved in a volunteer vacation, here's a round-up of extraordinary excursions that could help strengthen your family connections, deepen your compassion, and provide a remarkable learning experience for your children.

Cross Cultural Solutions

In its one-week Insight Abroad program, Cross Cultural Solutions pairs families with local people in Brazil, China, Costa Rica, Guatemala, Morocco, Peru, Russia or Thailand to work on community-led initiatives. Projects include teaching conversational English; caring for children, the elderly and people with disabilities; and assisting medical professionals in local health clinics. For families who are able to devote a greater amount of time, the organization also offers two- to 12-weeklong programs in a wider range of countries.

Global Citizens Network

With the goal of promoting peace and preserving indigenous cultures, Global Citizens Network enlists volunteers in tasks such as refurbishing community buildings and working with local artisans. With opportunities available in both the U.S. and abroad, recent projects include helping with maple syrup harvest on a Native American reservation in Minnesota and roofing construction for Tibetan refugees in Nepal. To help families find their ideal volunteer sites, the network provides a "family friendliness rating" that factors in weather conditions, terrain, school schedules and other concerns.

Global Volunteers

In 18 countries around the world (including China, Ghana, Greece, India, Italy, Mexico, Peru and the U.S.), this nonprofit group partners volunteers with local people to "help create a foundation for world peace through mutual international understanding." Aiming to foster community development, Global Volunteers places participants in such service projects as painting and repairing buildings, caring for at-risk children, and working with community elders.

Earthwatch Institute

Each year, Earthwatch recruits nearly 4,000 volunteers to work with scientists specializing in rainforest ecology, wildlife conservation, marine science, and other fields integral to advancing the cause of environmental sustainability. With a focus on helping children develop an appreciation for the natural world, the institute's family expeditions allow kids to assist scientists in their field research. Those family-friendly projects include collecting medicinal plants in Kenya, as well as tracking climate-change-threatened Pacific grey whales in British Columbia.

United Planet

This international nonprofit aims to promote "Relational Diplomacy" — the notion that the "relationship between people of diverse backgrounds is the basic building block for uniting the world." To help foster understanding and respect across cultural divides, United Planet's Families Abroad! program offers one- to 12-week excursions in 50 countries throughout Africa, Latin America, Asia and Europe. Combining service work with language immersion, cultural activities and learning adventures, volunteer opportunities include working on health-awareness campaigns in India, caring for children in a Romanian orphanage, and teaching English at a women's shelter in Chile.

Hands Up Holidays

Merging sightseeing with service, Hands Up Holidays vacations devote a portion of their travelers' time to volunteering and leave the rest of the trip open for leisure. Offering getaways to more than 30 countries (including Indonesia, New Zealand and Ecuador), Hands Up Holidays recommends consulting directly with its staff to determine the trip that's best suited to your family. Kid-friendly adventures include a 14-day trip to Brazil (where travelers can join in reservoir construction, house-building, reforestation and honey extraction, as well as visit the Mata Atlantica rainforest, a manatee research center, and an outback ranch) and a 15-day exploration of Fiji (with highlights including teaching and home-repair projects, in addition to white-water rafting, snorkeling, hiking and sailing).

Volunteers for Peace

Striving to create a more peaceful planet, Volunteers for Peace provides placement in more than 3,000 volunteer projects in 100+ countries (including the U.S.) each year. In programs that typically last two to three weeks, volunteers work and live together and carry out all cooking and cleaning on a rotating basis. Family-friendly projects include working at a children's summer camp in Naples, Italy; cultivating gardens throughout an eco-village in Sweden; and laying up seaside stones for cyclone protection in Vanuatu (an island nation in the South Pacific).

Shopping Guide: Eco-Pet Posh

Sarah Kraft — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 19:35:00 GMT

We love our pets. They link us to the natural world and impart insight beyond our human scope. We hike with our dogs in the early morning light and marvel at what draws their attention. We meditate with our cats as the day draws to a close, and learn from them what it is to be simultaneously alert and at peace. The animals in our lives give us companionship, heart-healthy interaction and entertainment (can anything on TV top the sight of a puppy tumbling for a tennis ball or a kitten flying after a shoelace?). How can we reciprocate? We can provide them with earth-loving beds, toys, habitats and collars. To help green up the essentials for the pet in your life, we’ve searched for and tested the most affordable eco-friendly pet products we could find.

Dogs

Gear

Bathe your pooch in natural ingredients that help soothe dry skin and relieve itching. We love Happy Tails—a canine spa line that offers an array of natural products, including colloidal oatmeal shampoo and Fur Butter made with shea butter, calendula, aloe and oatmeal. ($14/$19)

For dogs with big personalities, Keeka’s cute line of 100 percent organic tank tops is a great option. Featuring the same designs as their baby line, including cupcake, princess and peanut, you’re sure to find one that fits your dog’s style. ($15)

Got Skunked? NuHemp Botanicals’ Omega Zapp Skunk Odour Removal Shampoo is the perfect answer. As part of their entire Omega Therapy line utilizing hemp oil and oatmeal, the skunk shampoo also features apple cider vinegar and other emollients to get the skunk out—fast. ($14.99)

Toys

My two dogs instantly fell in love with the flexible, stretchable, floatable Bumi by West Paw Design that makes tug-of-war a real challenge. Although the Zogoflex® material is recyclable, I can’t see the need—this thing is indestructible. ($13.50)

For dogs that prefer “babies,” West Paw Design’s line of Dodo toys, made from 85 percent recycled IntelliLoft fibers and stuffed with IntelliLoft fill, are a perfect option. Soft, cuddly and nontoxic. ($13)

The toys from A Cheerful Pet are made from 100 percent wool and are hand-crafted by artisans in Nepal, helping support the local economy and various charity groups. The colorful wool is woven into everything from sea creatures to their cute Headzees line and Woolzees balls. A definite fave. (contact for pricing)

The Orbee-Tuff RecycleBONE from Planet Dog is made from recycled “regrind” Orbee-Tuff material and is the ultimate toy for chewers who just can’t seem to get enough. ($11.95)

Collars/Leashes

Outfit your eco dog with a hemp collar, leash or harness from Earth Dog. Their line of hemp products is anything but boring, with designs including the Om symbol, bold stars, the royal crown and daisies. ($20-37)

Furniture/Beds

For a modern—and versatile take on the dog bed, check out Eazy Bean’s collection of bean bag seats, loungers and cushions designed for everyone in the family. The suede covers are all made from 100 percent post-consumer product, and the filling can be recycled. The question is, when your bag arrives will you really give it to your pooch?! (prices vary)

New car and hairy pet? (Me, too!) Don’t fret with the Harry Barker Quilted Car Seat Cover. Made from 100 percent organic cotton, this comfy pad will protect your vehicle’s interior and is nontoxic and machine-washable. ($68)

Ruff Wear’s Mt. Bachelor Pad is the perfect bed for the back of your car and your home, too. Created with recycled fleece, the cover is made from PVC-free polycloth that keeps moisture away—perfect for after-the-lake jaunts or snowy days. ($59.95-$74.95)

For the crème de la crème of dog beds, turn to West Paw Design’s new Organic Bumper Bed. Certified safe by the Oeko-Tex Standard 100, these beds are made from organic cotton and stuffed with 100 percent recycled Intelliloft fiber and come in great colors, including a bright green basil, a deep purple huckleberry, and a show-stopping orange ember. They also make an Eco Nap pad and a cushy Eco Slumber Bed. ($68+)

Necessities

You take your omega-3s, and your dogs should too. Nordic Naturals Omega-3 Pet Capsules deliver the same health benefits, assisting and supporting healthy skin, coats and joints, reducing inflammation, and supporting the development and maintenance of the brain and eyes. ($19.95 for 90 capsules)

You think your food is full of fillers? Wait until you look more closely at the ingredients listed in most conventional dog food. If you really want to feed your pet well, feed them natural food. We love Holistic Select’s dog food, which comes in a variety of simple formulas, featuring simple proteins and grains (no corn), as well as probiotics, digestive enzymes, and antioxidant-rich fruits and veggies.

If you only make one change, be sure to switch to compostable “poo” bags. BioBag Dog Waste Bags are available on a roll, making it easy to clean up without creating more garbage. ($5.50 for 40 bags)

The Honest Kitchen dog treats are made from hormone-free meats and antioxidant-rich fruit. I’m pretty sure the “Smooches” treats—made with chicken and cranberries—will elevate my pooches in the dog park popularity contest. ($14)

Cats

Toys

Bring out the tiger in your kitty with organic catnip toys. From the Field, based in Rainier, Wash., produces toys made of 100 percent organic hemp fabric and locally-grown catnip. Entice Fluff with the bestselling Shelby the Mouse or purchase a Purrfect Gift Kit for that hard-to-buy-for feline. The hemp fabric stands up to cats that kick toys hard with their back feet, yet it’s soft enough for kitties that cuddle their toys more gently. ($5; see Web site for retailers)

The Kong Company’s new line of natural toys consists of mice, crinkle fish and chase balls made from organic catnip, cotton fabric and thread, buckwheat and straw. These delights are incredibly lightweight and the perfect size for kitties that like to carry or wash their toys. Challenge your tubbier tabby by making him jump for the feathery straw ball teaser! Available anywhere cat toys are sold. ($5)

Too much of a good thing can lead to ennui. Case in point, some kitties overexposed to catnip become resistant to its charms. If your moggie has grown “meh” about catnip, try toys stuffed with cat-attracting honeysuckle wood instead. Kitty Kottage, out of Edmonton, Alberta, features an extensive collection of toys made from locally harvested honeysuckle. The cotton cushion is your best green bet, but don’t overlook the play mats or body pillows (made with kicking kitties in mind). ($3–$12)

Collars

We want our outside cats to wear collars that hold ID tags; kitties want to scratch, bite, and twist out of any collar we put on them. The best solution is Silly Kitty’s breakaway hemp cat collars that come in seven hand-dyed colors and are so soft, kitty won’t mind wearing one. Washable, durable Silly Kitty collars are sold throughout the U.S. and Canada; check out the Web site for a list of retailers. ($10)

Fashion-forward felines might insist on the repurposed collars made by Annie’s Sweatshop. Catering primarily to canines, this Waterloo, Ontario, shop run by Ann Marie Matott also turns out cat collars made from recycled fabric, including old curtains and neckties. The buckles on Annie’s collars have been salvaged from discards, and each one is adorned with bright, repurposed buttons. ($15; send in a used collar and receive $3 off)

Cardboard Scratchers

Cats need to scratch—it’s their way to shed claws and mark territory through scent organs in their paws. To save the couch and your sanity, invest in any of these scratchers made from recycled and recyclable cardboard.

Omega Paw’s Ripple Board Scratch’n Massage Bed offers the best of all worlds for a lazy cat on a lazy day: Felix won’t even have to get out of bed to sharpen his claws. Made from 98 percent post-consumer and diverted materials, this bed/scratcher boasts three layers of Omega’s patented Ripple Board treated with organic catnip oil; remove layers as Felix destroys—er—exercises his claws on them. Available at pet supply stores. ($13)

Smarty Kat’s Complete Needs System offers a variety of scratchers, ranging from simple boxes for kitties that scratch horizontal surfaces to incline scratchers for cats that like to get their backs into the job. Smarty Kat’s most innovative design is the CatChaise, a curved platform of cardboard made for lounging and scratching. Find the CatChaise in supermarkets and discount department stores. ($15)

The Wall Flower Cardboard Scratcher, developed by Marmalade Pet Care, suggests undulating waves in sherbet shades. Although the Wall Flower can be used on the floor, we recommend mounting one to a wall to create a vertical scratching heaven for kitties that love to stretch as they scratch. ($42; wall clips sold separately)

Furniture

The Caboodle Corrugated Habitat solves the problem of costly pet furniture most simply. At first glance, the Caboodle looks like a stack of cardboard boxes, but it’s collapsible, made of reinforced, recycled cardboard, and can be recycled once its day has passed. Decorate the unadorned Caboodle yourself, and you’ll have a great-looking, sturdy playhouse for frisky kitties or a haven for elderly or convalescing cats. ($30)

Is your calico a climber? Present her with a handcrafted Mountain Cat Tree, and she’ll never touch the drapes or bookshelves again. Mountain Cat Trees are sculpted from pine, poplar and birch downed by storms or culled by forest management in the North Quabbin region of Massachusetts. Designer Rebecca Mountain takes two to six weeks to shape the untreated wood into each unique cat tree, which range in height from three to six feet. Order from the Web site; custom orders welcome (from $129).

The Platform C cat tower from DKCat is stylish, modern and undeniably green. Each tower is constructed of bamboo platforms, reclaimed wood posts, natural sisal rope and replaceable carpet. The towers are window-height, ideal for perching felines tracking neighborhood birds, and the clean lines will fit in with any Mad Men–inspired decor. Visit designer Dani Kilmer’s Web site to order and for information on other products (from $180).

Doe, a Deer

Sarah Kraft — Wed, 06 Jan 2010 21:21:00 GMT

Keep your cuddly cubs, frisky fawns and pensive owlets stylish and warm with MissFitt & Co’s infant and toddler hats. Handmade with super soft wool felt (no itching or scratching here) in an array of beautiful colors, the designs are just as practical as they are cute. Creator Wendy Allen derives inspiration from the flower gardens and woodlands surrounding her cottage in North Carolina. Bonus: She makes gorgeous hats, scarves and mittens for mamas, too. ($45+)

You've Got The Power

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 21:25:00 GMT

Fifteen years ago, if you told your friends and family that you hoped to deliver your baby in a birthing tub with a midwife and doula in attendance, they might've looked at you as if you were speaking Vulcan. And if you told them you wanted an elective Cesarean section, they might have gasped, "Is that legal?"

Today, these choices may still raise an eyebrow or two, but thanks to increasing awareness about childbirth options, more and more women are realizing there isn't one "right" way to have a baby. And when expecting moms figure out what will make them feel most safe and most empowered during labor, chances are their friends will say, "Oh, I read about that on the Web" or "Cool, my cousin did the same thing."

Something for everyone
The landscape of childbirth has seen enormous changes over the past decade and a half. Granted, some of the changes are unsettling: The C-section rate is soaring (approximately 1 in 3 women in the U.S. will now deliver this way), as the rate of vaginal births after C-section plummets and the number of inductions climbs.

But here's the good news: If you want a natural, unmedicated birth, there are plenty of people who can help you achieve your goal. Midwives now attend around 8 percent of all U.S. births, and the number of certified doulas, who provide continuous emotional support throughout labor, has tripled since 1992.

If you prefer a medicated birth, you'll be happy to know the technology to ease the pain of labor improves every day. "Two significant changes are that the amount of medication administered in the epidural has been dramatically lowered, and the option of patient-controlled epidural analgesia have been introduced," explains William Camann, M.D., a co-author of Easy Labor: Every Woman's Guide to Choosing Less Pain and More Joy During Childbirth (Ballantine Books). "With lower-dose epidurals, most women have some feeling with contractions, and they are able to move their legs, which assists with pushing and allows more emotional involvement with the delivery."

Perhaps the most significant change in childbirth has nothing to do with needles, midwives or inductions. Thanks to the Internet, you can not only find out where to rent a birthing tub or look up the difference between an epidural and spinal, but it's possible for a woman in Kentucky to chat with a woman in Miami about how to deal with the pain of early labor or how to get those pushy in-laws out of the delivery room. The global community has provided more information, more access to resources and—most important—more mom-to-mom support.

Even with these strides, childbirth is not something you can completely control. But you can up your odds of having the most satisfying birth experience by taking these steps:

1. Do your homework Spend some time figuring out what is most important for you in labor. Do you want to move around? Do you want friends and family in the room with you? Is pain relief your top priority? Then, grill your doctor, midwife or birth center about anything that might concern you, especially their C-section rate, their feelings about inductions and alternative forms of pain relief, and how long they will allow you to labor before insisting on interventions. If you are uncomfortable with their responses, look for someone else.

2. Prepare like you're running a marathon Get your support team on board: Who will stay with you in the early stages of labor; who will be with you in the birth room; who will help you at home afterward. If you hope to have a natural birth, take classes on pain-control methods. Talk to women who have had positive experiences and ask their advice. And no matter what your birth plan is, read at least one chapter of one book about C-sections, because even if you try everything possible to avoid one, there is a chance you will have one.

3. Let it go Hopefully, you will have a happy, healthy birth experience. But if it doesn't go quite as planned, know that it isn't your fault. So go ahead and enjoy the best part of childbirth: becoming a mom.

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You Have To Take Care Of You, Too

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 21:22:00 GMT

Pregnancy was the healthiest time in my life. With baby on board, I finally found the motivation I needed to eat right, get enough rest and exercise. But the minute I delivered my son, my focus shifted entirely to him. I wanted the best for him, 24/7, and put myself entirely at his service. What new mom wouldn't?

Somewhere around the six-month mark, however, I realized I might have gone a little overboard on making it all about him. He was thriving, yes, but I wasn't sleeping. I wasn't bathing. I wasn't getting out of the house. I was flabby and exhausted, and—worst of all—bursting into tears four times a day. I was, in short, a mess.

With 20/20 hindsight, I can see that I'd have been a better mother in those early months if I'd taken a little time out to attend to my own needs. Experts agree. Here's their advice for staying happy and healthy.

Put Yourself on a Feeding Schedule
The most important thing you can do to maintain your energy is to eat well, says Eileen Behan, R.D., author of Eat Well, Lose Weight While Breastfeeding (Ballantine Books). "You need to remember to feed yourself; if you don't, you'll run out of energy and make poor food choices that you regret later," she says. To get what you need, aim to make 90 percent of your food choices nutritious ones. "Put yourself on a feeding schedule that's not too different from the one you'll want to move your child to—three meals a day, plus a couple of snacks," Behan says.

Share the Sleep Burden
New moms should take care to schedule sleep for themselves at night. "A few uninterrupted hours of sleep at night will help keep the brain chemistry steady and the biorhythms on track," says Shoshana Bennett, Ph.D., author of Postpartum Depression for Dummies (For Dummies). Sleep with the baby close to you, or in a bedside bassinet, so you can nurse in bed. Or, pump in advance and let your partner handle late-night bottle feedings so you can sleep in shifts.

Beat the Baby Blues
Postpartum depression will strike 1 in 7 new mothers, says Bennett. And, it can happen later than you think, sometimes up to one year after delivery. Ask a friend or your partner to help you watch for the signs. "If you're angry all the time, if you don't have an appetite, if you feel hopeless or anxious, or if you're taking it personally that the baby's not eating well, these are signs that you may be depressed," she says. "Normal baby blues should be gone within two weeks of the birth." Antidepressants can be a safe option, but they're not the only answer. "Many moms are afraid to come forward because they don't want to take medication," Bennett says. "Sometimes support, education and good nutrition are all that's needed."

Sneak in Exercise
It takes stamina to care for a baby—and the demands only grow once your child is on the move. "You can get energy and relieve emotional and physical stress with exercise," says LaReine Chabut, author of Lose That Baby Fat!(M. Evans & Co.). "But it's unrealistic to plan workouts every day of the week; you'll set yourself up for failure that way. Instead, do it on the fly—fit in 10 minutes twice a day if you can." The best way? Join other moms on stroller walks with your baby (see "Rock and Stroll" as well as a post-baby abdominal workout below).

Join a New Moms Group—or Not!
It sounds a little selfish, but in the early days of motherhood you should do whatever makes you feel best. Join a new moms group, take a bubble bath, make a date with daddy—these are all good ideas, but only if they make you feel better and not like one more addition to your to-do list. Because when it comes to really feeling good, it's all about you.

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What's Up With Your Post-Baby Body?

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 21:10:00 GMT

You've finalized every detail of your birthing plan, from choosing which CDs will help you relax to deciding whether you want an epidural to ease your pain. But have you thought about how you'll cope after your baby is born? "New moms often are surprised by how long it takes to heal and feel like themselves again," says Judy Chang, M.D., an assistant professor of obstetrics and gynecology at the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center. "I know I was."

But knowledge is power: Knowing what to expect when you're no longer pregnant and how to rev up your recovery will help you through this vulnerable--but mercifully temporary!--time. And once you're feeling more like your old self, it may be time to look like her too. That's where our gentle, progressive workout to strengthen and flatten your abdominal muscles comes in. Here's our guide to handling some of the most common postpartum body shocks, and, as a bonus, our super-effective ab routine to begin when you're ready.

1. Vaginal Soreness
Why it happens During delivery, the birth canal stretches, then stretches some more. As the baby emerges, your peri-neum--the area between the vagina and the anus--may tear or be cut by the doctor (an episiotomy) to facilitate delivery.

Feel-better advice Apply ice packs to reduce inflammation and swelling, says Amy Murtha, M.D., an assistant professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Duke University Hospital in Durham, N.C. Take a sitz bath (sit in a tub filled with a few inches of warm water) a few times a day, use refrigerated Tucks pads, and try anesthetic sprays containing a numbing agent such as benzocaine (often offered at the hospital and available at drugstores too). Taking pain relievers such as ibuprofen or acetaminophen also can ease discomfort. While urinating, squirt your perineum with warm water to lessen stinging. When sitting, using a "donut"--a round cushion with a hole in the middle--can take pressure off this sensitive area.

2. Vaginal Bleeding
Why it happens The uterine lining thickens enormously during pregnancy. After delivery, the lining is shed along with a bloody discharge, together known as lochia.

Feel-better advice Bleeding for several days to a few weeks is normal, explains Murtha, but it should stop by your six-week checkup. Wear pads, since tampons raise the risk of infection at this time. Consult your doctor if you are soaking a pad or more an hour; this may be a sign of postpartum hemorrhage. Also seek medical attention if the bleeding slows down a few weeks after delivery and then suddenly increases.

3. Cesarean-Section Pain
Why it happens A C-section is major surgery that involves cutting through several layers of tissue in the abdomen and spreading the abdominal muscles apart.

Feel-better advice Take your prescribed pain medication as directed at the first sign of discomfort--it's safe, even if you're nursing. "It is so much easier to prevent pain than it is to catch up with it," explains Chang. Minimizing discomfort also will encourage moving about, which can reduce your risk for developing blood clots and relieve post-surgery gas pains.

To get out of bed during the first couple of weeks: Place your legs over the edge, allowing gravity to help out; wait a few seconds, then use your arms to push yourself up. (You'll become familiar with this technique in your third trimester.) While the incision heals, keep it clean and dry, and report any bleeding, swelling or unusual redness to your doctor.

4. Incontinence
Why it happens The stress of pregnancy and pushing during delivery can weaken the pelvic floor, allowing urine to "leak."

Feel-better advice Realize that incontinence is common, but also that it often resolves within six months to a year. If you leak a lot of urine, wear a pad. Avoid caffeine, and to keep your bladder from getting too full, head to the bathroom as soon as you feel the urge to go.

Kegel exercises can help prevent incontinence by strengthening the pelvic floor, notes certified Pilates instructor Jennifer Gianni, creator of the Fusion Pilates Post-Pregnancy & C-section Recovery DVD (fusionpilates.com). Contract the muscles around the vagina as if you're stopping the flow of urine; hold for 10 seconds, breathing normally, then slowly release. Aim to do 10 to 20 Kegels a few times a day. If incontinence lasts several months, consult your doctor.

5. Constipation
Why it happens C-section surgery can temporarily slow the bowels, as can the use of narcotic pain relievers such as Vicodin. Women who've had vaginal deliveries may become constipated if they hold back during bowel movements out of fear of pain.

Feel-better advice Eat a fiber-rich diet and drink eight 8-ounce glasses of water a day to keep bowel movements regular. You also can ask your OB-GYN to prescribe stool softeners.

6. Hair Loss
Why it happens When you're pregnant, your body is in growth mode, and that includes your hair. But those thick tresses will start shedding by six to 16 weeks after childbirth as your hormone levels fluctuate, says Andrea Cambio, M.D., a New York City dermatologist and a spokeswoman for the American Academy of Dermatology.

Feel-better advice Rest assured that your hair won't be clogging the shower drain forever; the shedding ends by six months after you give birth. In the meantime, adding layers or highlights can help your locks look fuller, Cambio says.

7. Hemorrhoids
Why it happens During pregnancy, constipation and pressure from the uterus on the rectum can cause varicose veins there. So can pushing during delivery.

Feel-better advice Take a sitz or a tub bath to ease the itching and pain, advises Susan Harvey, M.D., an OB-GYN at Swedish Medical Center in Seattle. Cold compresses soaked in witch hazel can help decrease swelling and discomfort, as can anti-inflammatory hemorrhoid creams. Try to avoid constipation, since straining also can lead to hemorrhoids.

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What You Eat = Your Baby's Future

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 21:06:00 GMT

You are what you eat. That's old news. So is the fact that your diet during pregnancy affects your newborn's health. But the new news is that what you eat in the next nine months can impact your baby's health, as well as your own, for decades to come. Here are easy nutrition tips that will help you both.

1. Get enough folic acid. Ideally, you need 400 micrograms of this B vitamin daily before conceiving. Because sufficient intake in the first trimester reduces neural-tube defects such as spina bifida by 50 to 70 percent, you should increase the dose to 600 micrograms when pregnancy is confirmed. New research suggests that supplementing with folic acid for a year before pregnancy and in the second trimester can also dramatically reduce the risk of preterm delivery.

2. Don't "eat for two." Some 46 percent of women gain too much weight during pregnancy. The upshot: an increased risk for preeclampsia, gestational diabetes and delivery of either a preterm or a too-large baby. Prenatal weight-gain standards may soon be revamped. Meanwhile, ask your doctor and go to fitpregnancy.com/weightgain.

3. Eat your fish. Getting enough DHA (found in abundance in seafood and flaxseed) is one of the most important things you can do for your and your developing baby's health, nutritionists say. DHA is the omega-3 fatty acid that can boost your baby's brain development before birth, leading to better vision, memory, motor skills and language comprehension in early childhood. Eat at least 12 ounces a week of low-mercury fish, or take a DHA supplement (they're safe). For more information and a list of safe fish, go to fitpregnancy.com/mercuryrising.

4. Avoid alcohol. Behavior problems, learning disabilities, attention deficit disorder, hyperactivity and aggressive behavior in children can result when mom drinks during pregnancy. No amount is safe.

5. Get adequate iron. During pregnancy, your iron needs nearly double, to about 30 milligrams per day, to support your 50-percent increase in blood volume and to promote fetal iron storage. Iron transports oxygen, and your baby benefits from a healthy supply. To boost absorption, combine iron-rich foods with vitamin C, such as loading your chicken burrito with salsa.

6. Ban bacteria. To protect your baby from harmful bacteria such as Listeria, Salmonella and E. coli, any of which can, in severe cases, cause miscarriage or preterm delivery, steer clear of soft cheeses made with unpasteurized milk, as well as raw or undercooked meat, poultry, seafood or eggs. Keep your fridge below 40*F, and dump leftover food that's been sitting out for more than two hours.

7. Limit caffeine. About 300 milligrams of caffeine per day, the amount in about two cups of coffee, has long been considered acceptable during pregnancy. But a Kaiser Permanente study recently found that consuming 200 milligrams of caffeine per day increased miscarriage risk. "There's no magic cut-off point, but the less the better," says the study's lead author, perinatal epidemiologist De-Kun Li, M.D., Ph.D.

8. Trash junk food. If you constantly indulge in fries and shakes now, your child might clamor for Dairy Queen in the future, new research on animals suggests. "Somehow a salty, sugary, high-fat, low nutrient-dense diet seems to program a baby's taste preference," says Elizabeth Somer, M.A., R.D., author of Nutrition for a Healthy Pregnancy (Henry Holt).

9. Bone up on calcium. Aim to get at least 1,000 milligrams a day; your baby needs it for tooth and bone development in the second and third trimesters. Plus, if you don't get enough calcium in your diet, the fetus will leach it from your bones, which may increase your osteoporosis risk later in life.

10. Buy organic foods whenever possible. Pesticide exposure has been linked to miscarriage, birth defects, preterm birth, growth restriction and some childhood cancers and immune disorders. Eating organic foods can result in lower pesticide levels in adults and in children, whose immune systems are not yet fully developed.

11. Focus on fiber. A diet high in fruits, vegetables and whole grains helps prevent constipation and hemorrhoids and keeps you feeling full so you are less likely to overeat. High-fiber foods also are packed with vitamins, minerals and phytochemicals essential to your baby's development. Aim to get at least 25 to 35 milligrams of fiber a day, about twice what most Americans consume.

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What Not to Eat

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 21:03:00 GMT

If you’re like many pregnant women, you vowed to eat healthier the minute you found out you were expecting. You may even have started making a mental list of nutritional do’s and don’ts: Eat more calcium-rich foods, get more protein and cut out the caffeine and junk food. Good thing: Developing healthy eating habits now will set the stage for your baby to grow into a strong child and adult, as well as ultimately reduce his risk for certain diseases. In fact, scientific research increasingly shows that a prenatal diet rich in nutrient-dense foods is key in preventing heart disease, diabetes, obesity and many types of cancer. Here’s expert advice on what to eat—and what to avoid—for a healthy pregnancy and a healthy child:

DO choose foods that perform double duty
“Nutrient-dense foods, such as yogurt, peanut butter, chicken, beef, eggs and dairy products, are higher in protein, calcium and iron, all nutrients your baby needs to grow and develop,” says Rose Ann Hudson, R.D., L.D., co-author of 2003’s Eating for Pregnancy: An Essential Guide to Nutrition With Recipes for the Whole Family.
Some other examples of nutrient-dense foods: Lean pork, like beef, contains protein, along with B vitamins, iron and zinc. Orange juice offers folate (a B vitamin that helps prevent neural tube defects) plus vitamin C, which helps you absorb iron from foods such as fiber-rich black beans and spinach. Whole grains are filled with fiber, B vitamins, magnesium and zinc.

DON’T eat empty calories
Sweet treats are OK during pregnancy—but in moderation, Hudson says. “One of the ways we enjoy life is to eat foods that aren’t high in nutrition, like desserts. But limit them to one portion a day (read labels); you won’t feel deprived and you also won’t be as tempted to overeat.”

DO remember that you’re not really eating for two
“Eat until you are not hungry rather than until you are full,” advises OB-GYN Karen Nordahl, M.D., a clinical assistant professor at the University of British Columbia in Vancouver. “Excess weight gain is associated with longer labor, pregnancy-induced hypertension and gestational diabetes,” Nordahl adds. Indeed, many women don’t realize they need only 300 extra calories a day—and only in the second and third trimesters.

DON’T forget your vitamins
A daily prenatal vitamin and mineral supplement acts as a safeguard. “In a perfect world, you’d get all your nutrients from foods,” says Suki Hertz, M.S., R.D., a nutritionist and chef in New York. “But since our lives are often a little less than perfect, you should take a supplemental prenatal vitamin that contains 100 to 200 percent of the recommended dietary intakes for vitamins and minerals.”

DO strive for variety
Along with taking your prenatal supplement, the best way to make sure that you’ll get all the proper nutrients is to eat the following daily:

9 servings from the whole-grains group (bread, cereal, rice and pasta)
2–3 servings of protein-rich foods from the meat, poultry, fish, beans, eggs and nuts group
4 servings of vegetables
3 servings from the fruit group
3 servings from the milk, yogurt and cheese group.

DON’T forgo water and fiber
Drink at least eight glasses of water daily to help prevent dehydration. This can also can help prevent constipation, as can eating high-fiber foods such as whole-wheat and whole-grain breads and pastas, and lots of fruits and vegetables. Fiber also helps you feel full, so you may be less likely to overeat. Aim for at least 25 to 35 grams of fiber every day (3⁄4 cup of bran cereal, for example, contains an average of 5 grams of fiber).

DO avoid risky foods
Unpasteurized soft cheeses such as Brie, Camembert, Feta, blue-veined and Mexican-style cheeses, can harbor Listeria, a bacterium that causes listeriosis, a serious infection that can lead to miscarriage, premature delivery or stillbirth.
Deli meats also may pose a risk, so buy prepackaged cold cuts rather than those from the deli counter, or heat deli-counter meats thoroughly before eating them. “To minimize the risk of listeriosis, cook all leftovers and deli foods to at least 140˚ F,” Hertz says. For the same reason, never eat raw or undercooked meat, seafood (that includes sushi!) or eggs.

DON’T eat high-mercury fish
These include shark, king mackerel, tilefish and swordfish. Federal guidelines recommend limiting low-mercury fish to 12 ounces a week. Safe choices include canned light tuna (limit albacore tuna, which is higher in mercury, to 6 ounces a week, maximum), catfish, pollock, salmon and shellfish. For more on seafood consumption during pregnancy, including the best sources of brain-boosting omega-3 fatty acids, go to fitpregnancy.com/mercuryrising.

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This Is What Family Looks Like Now

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 21:00:00 GMT

"An ounce of blood is worth more than a pound of friendship" goes the Spanish proverb, but you can't prove it by me. The only child of a single mother who was also an only child, I grew up a continent away from anyone who could even remotely be called kin. Although I can't have children, and my husband's kids reside far from us, I could be living smack in the middle of "The Waltons," so wide and deep are the connections among the people I love and the obligations we share.

If Census Bureau statistics are right, my life may look something like yours. Only about 15 percent of Americans live in a "Leave It to Beaver" family, in which a married couple raises their biological children. Today's family might have one mom or two, or, for that matter, two dads. Their babies could arrive via one of those assisted reproduction techniques with the beguiling acronyms—IVF or GIFT or ZIFT—or with the help of sperm or egg donors or a surrogate's pregnancy. There are "blended" families with children from past relationships, children adopted or fostered, grandparents raising grandkids. Regardless of type, the strongest are wrapped in a supportive net woven of community and extended relations.

Social scientists at the turn of the last century talked about "kinship systems" in terms of blood relation, but modern researchers increasingly look to interdependence created through personal alliances to explain how we organize our deepest bonds. Mine have been forged by marriage, through shared work and school, mutual spiritual beliefs and artistic passions—and all have been tempered by years, tears and a lot of laughs. Without them, what would life mean?

As Jane Howard, biographer of anthropologist Margaret Mead, once said: "Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one."

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This Is The Time Of Your Life

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 20:56:00 GMT

There are things nobody tells you: That your belly will itch so much it feels like the prickle is on the inside. That when traffic makes your husband an hour late, you'll have the phone in hand ready to call the police, absolutely positive that he's become a paraplegic in a five-car pileup. That your "morning" sickness will happen at night and last for more than six stomach-churning months, and your husband's breath will smell like rotting meat. Then you'll do a Google search or pick up The Girlfriends' Guide to Pregnancy and realize that the warnings were there all along, but your eyes had skipped over them, that you can't understand what it means to be pregnant until you are throwing up into your purse at the mall. Until, that is, you are living it yourself.

Even then, there are phases of pregnancy you couldn't possibly have anticipated, like when the sidewalk can resemble a comfortable place to nap and how at first you can't tell whether the baby's kicking or you just have indigestion. Nor can anyone really describe to you how your body and heart suddenly will feel full of purpose and promise. How the fact that you're cooking a baby who will undoubtedly have the funny ears that run in your husband's family and the impossibly long eyelashes that run in yours — that you're creating an ancestral DNA of your own! — trumps every annoying, weird symptom that comes along. People forget to mention how this mysterious little person will keep you company every hour of every day, banishing every notion of loneliness for the unforeseeable future, how even though you've yet to meet, you'll love your growing baby with a ferocity that makes Superwoman look wimpy, and how glad you'll be that your body knows how to make eyelashes without consulting you.

At first your pregnancy is a delicious, almost licentious, secret. Then you start to show and find yourself a member of a club that you didn't know existed, part of an underworld of intimacy among moms-to-be and moms-that-are. You are privy to details about other women's labors, the ones that lasted 36 hours and the ones so abrupt that the baby emerged in a shower stall. Co-workers who never looked twice at you now smile at your burgeoning belly and tell you about their grown children. The gruff man at the deli slips an extra pickle in your order; the teenager at the check-out counter carries your bags to the car (embarrassed at the way your body is a visual reminder that yes, you've had sex); and your across-the-street neighbor pats your pointy belly and predicts you will definitely have a boy (you know it's a girl but don't have the heart to contradict her).

And no one ever tells you that when the morning sickness finally passes, it seems like someone washed windows you hadn't known were dirty, every color more vibrant, every object more distinct. You feel strong and resolute and find yourself skipping down the street. You delight over your new bra in the larger size and the cute string bikini underwear you've bought to go with it (no maternity panties for us, thank you). You swim at the Y under the smiling gaze of seniors doing water aerobics and accept the compliments when people admire your glow. Because you are: You're glowing and beautiful and elated, and your husband is painting the nursery and your body is taking care of the eyelashes. Pregnancy is the time of your life, holding, at the end of it, the promise of something sweeter than you've ever known.

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The Real World Mamas Know Best

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 20:47:00 GMT

When I found out I was expecting my first child, my friend Leslie was about to give birth. "Are you ready?" I asked her. "Yes and no," she said. "I have 21 onesies and footie things, so yes. But I have no idea how to raise a child, so no."

It was the most honest answer I'd ever heard. None of us ever feels truly ready to become a mother, no matter how full the changing-table drawers, how tall the tower of reading material on our bedside table. So we turn to each other. It was Leslie who told me which nursing pads to buy, and Kadi who reassured me it was OK for my son to fall asleep at the breast, and another woman — whose name I don't even remember — who explained in graphic detail what it feels like when your water breaks. I met her at a party about a week before my water broke — 10 weeks early.

She probably saved my son's life.

It's the moms, the women on the frontline of pregnancy, who are the real experts. After her son was born, Leslie circulated a memo titled "What I Know Now" via e-mail.

Think of this piece as "What Lots of Smart Moms (Including Me and Assorted Experts Who Are Also Moms) Know Now." In a few months, you'll be able to add some tips of your own and pass it on.

On Pregnancy

"Splurge on one great pair of maternity jeans. They'll do wonders for your wardrobe and your self-esteem."
— Kate Neale Cooper

"I had a lot of expectations about the first time I'd see my baby on the sonogram, and I felt really guilty that I didn't feel more connected to this fuzzy image. But I am fantastically bonded with my baby now that she's here. You have to realize that there is no one way you're supposed to feel about this whole darn thing."
— Heather Hach, Los Angeles, mother of one

"If you're a first-time mother, add 10 days to your estimated due date to get a more correct date."
— Gail J. Dahl, author of Pregnancy & Childbirth Secrets (Innovative Publishing, 2007) and mother of one

"At my first ultrasound, I was told I was having a girl. Being a planner, I loaded my registry with pink gingham and monogrammed pillows for 'Hannah.' Imagine my surprise when Hannah was born with a banana! Remember to keep your expectations in check, save your receipts and don't wash all the clothes before the baby is born."
— Marcy Pryor, Kinnelon, N.J., mother of two

"Ginger-flavored Altoids made my morning sickness disappear for hours. Ginger tea, ginger ale, fresh ginger—didn't help at all. The Altoids are hard to find but well worth the hunt." (Editor's note: Find them at amazon.com and altoids.com.)
— Swati Virmani, Philadelphia, mother of one

"If you end up on bed rest, arrange a visit from a physical therapist who can teach you safe exercises to do in bed so your muscles and bones don't get weak. This will help you emotionally as well as physically."
— K.N.C.

"After I had my second miscarriage, I made a choice. I would not feel jealous or angry; I would not feel self-pity when I saw pregnant women, or new babies in strollers. I would instead pretend to be happy for them; I predicted that real happiness would follow. It was an experiment that did me a lot of good. It made me feel proactive — I learned not to wait for the third miscarriage before seeking help, like many doctors and health plans advise you to. And after many doctors and tests, lots of blood drawn, and seeing many friends have their babies, I finally had mine."
— Violet DELuna, Los Angeles, mother of one

"Call your insurance company to find out exactly what is and is not covered for your delivery. For instance, your insurance may not cover a private room, so requesting one might cost extra. Knowing what to expect upfront will save you the stress of unexpected bills later."
— K.N.C.

"Buy the next size maternity workout pants, swimsuits, sports bras and athletic shoes before you need them. You can't predict the day you can no longer stuff yourself into your workout clothes, and by the time you get around to buying bigger ones (if you ever do), you'll have missed a week or two of exercise."
— Suzanne Schlosberg, bend, ore., mother of two

"If you experience premature contractions, lie on your left side and drink at least a glass or two of water. If this makes them stop, you are experiencing 'false' labor. If it doesn't, call your doctor."
— Gail J. Dahl

"Pregnancy brings out the perfectionist in many women. They set unrealistically high expectations for diet, exercise, weight gain and delivery. They engage in black-and-white thinking and tend to believe that anything short of perfect is a failure. Set realistic goals and realize you don't have to do everything perfectly to have a healthy baby."
— Alice D. Domar, Ph.D., author of Be Happy Without Being Perfect (Crown, 2008) and mother of two

"Apply Lansinoh cream to your nipples every day for a month before giving birth. Although it's marketed for the treatment of sore nipples, it's very effective at preventing them."
— Erin Zamoff, Washington, D.C., mother of three

"If seeing the numbers on the scale escalate at each prenatal visit is going to stress you out, don't look. Ask that the nurse only speak about your weight gain if it's too much or too little."
— K.N.C.

"Take a 'babymoon.' A vacation with your partner before the baby arrives is a wonderful way to stay connected and focus on one another."
— nurse-practitioner Barbara Dehn, author of Your Personal Guide to Pregnancy (Blue Orchid Press, 2004) and mother of one

"Interview babysitters before you even have a baby. Finding the time when you're a new mom will be tough, and you don't want to choose someone out of desperation."
— Carrie Stidwell O'Boyle, Madison, Wis., mother of one

"Have your husband investigate his paternity leave options. My husband found out he was entitled to a paid six-week leave. Having an extra pair of hands with twins was essential."
— Sarah MacDonald, Newark, Del., mother of two

"End-of-pregnancy sleeplessness? Consider creating your own 'sleep number' bed using a semi-inflated air mattress."
— Sandy Jones, co-author with her daughter, Marcie Jones, of Great Expectations: Your All-in-One Resource for Pregnancy & Childbirth (Sterling, 2004)

On Giving Birth

"During labor, change positions every 20-30 minutes. Once you get comfortable, the baby gets comfortable. You want the baby out, not comfortable. it also helps to shift your pelvis, allowing the baby room to move through the birth canal."
— Maura Varley-Twyman, Richmond, Va., mother of four

"Realize that it's very, very rare for birth to go as planned, without a hitch. I'm convinced this is to prepare you for raising children, a job for which the most valued skills by far are flexibility and adaptability."
— Susy Greer, Washington, D.C., mother of two

"Write down the names of doctors and nurses at each shift change. It's so much easier to get someone's attention when you speak to them by name."
— K.N.C.

"Unless there is a medical reason, do not succumb to a premature induction. A naive and excited first-time mom can be easily tempted to be induced, but it is not worth the potential problems. I had a complicated C-section recovery after my OB induced me because I was 'close enough.'"
— Becky Boggan, Atlanta, mother of four

"When it is time to push, be sure you are not lying flat on your back. If you do, gravity will be working against you and may delay your baby's birth. If you are having back labor and are told your baby is 'posterior' or not facing the right way, push while lying on alternate sides to help the baby rotate into the best position."
— Bonnie Berk, R.N., founder of Motherwell (motherwellfitness.com) and mother of three

"Before you go home and get very busy taking care of your baby, write a thank-you note to your OB or midwife and the nurses. You'll always be glad you expressed your gratitude."
— Mary Ellen Strote, Calabasas, Calif., mother of two

On Being A New Mom

"The first time we did the deed after I had a baby, my boobs sprayed milk at the most inopportune moments. For a while after that, I wore a bra for bedroom romps, so I wouldn't have to be distracted by whatever the girls were doing."
— Gail O'Connor, New York, mother of two

"As soon as you can, go buy a couple of outfits that fit. You will look and feel better, which makes it much easier to accept your right-now body."
— Nicole Unice, Richmond, Va., mother of three

"In Chinese Medicine, it is said that how a woman treats herself in the first four weeks after giving birth will affect her health for the rest of her life. Because of this, many women are encouraged to stay home with the baby and not go out. This might be nearly impossible in our culture, but I think the best thing you can do is have a 'sitting in' or 'sleeping in' time with your baby for as long as you can. It's great for bonding too."
— Liz Richards, Portland, Ore., mother of two

"Nursing a baby is like marrying a man. You have to be fully committed from the start because there will be too many reasons not to continue."
— Leslie Housman

"Some people learn this the hard way: Your baby may not automatically be added to your medical policy. Have your husband call the insurance company as soon as the baby arrives."
— K.N.C.

"Change diapers before feeding, as you would never want to interrupt your baby's postprandial sleep for that."
— Rebecca Chandler, London, England, mother of two

"You'll get lots of pass-along baby gear from friends and family things that aren't exactly gifts. To avoid uncomfortable situations later, ask up front whether or not your benefactor wants the gear back."
— Hillari Dowdle, knoxville, Tenn., mother of one

"If your baby is in the NICU, ask the nurses what you can do to be involved with his care. They may let you change his diapers, feed him, sponge-bathe him and more."
— Marianne Gamboa, Shelby Township, Mich., mother of two

"Don't deprive yourself of even more sleep than necessary by changing a wet diaper in the middle of the night. Use lots of diaper ointment at bedtime and then only change the poopy ones."
— Heather Hach

"Everyone says to nap when your newborn naps, but that's just not realistic for most people. Instead, my husband and I took turns in the evenings: One of us would go to bed right after dinner, while the other was on baby duty until the wee hours of the morning. That way we were tired on alternate days."
— Heather Lusk, Indianapolis, mother of one

"If you have to give the baby just a snort or two of formula to get you both through the first couple of feedings, just do it. This is a marathon, not a sprint. It is much better for you and baby to be rested and fed than for you to be exhausted with extremely sore nipples."
— Susy Greer, Washington, D.C., mother of two

"Don't count on having pleasurable sex six weeks after you give birth. Apparently, there is a direct correlation between the number, type and frequency of utensils used during delivery and the degree of sexual discomfort afterward."
— Leslie Housman

"When we're drowning in a sea of information and overwhelmed by the you-must-have-this-organic-peapod-sling parenting culture, it's important to remind ourselves why we had children in the first place. It was not to follow all the rules. It was because we thought it would bring us joy, and we hoped to bring them joy, too."
— Heather Hach

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The Milky Way

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 20:42:00 GMT

Planning to breastfeed your baby? You should. Nothing compares to the intimate moments between a mother and her nursing child, and nothing—nothing—helps a baby get off to a healthier start in life.
Hundreds of studies have proved the short- and long-term benefits of nursing: It decreases the incidence not only of diarrhea, ear infections and sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) in babies, but also of diabetes, obesity, asthma, leukemia, bacterial meningitis and even some forms of lymphoma later in life. What’s more, research has shown that premature babies who are fed breast milk do better on tests of mentaldevelopment later in childhood than those given formula. These benefits likely apply to full-term babies as well.

There are plenty of proven perks for mothers, too: Breastfeeding reduces a woman’s lifetime risk of developing ovarian and breast cancers, as well as osteoporosis. Convinced? Keep reading and find out virtually everything you need to know to get off to a good start.

Top Keys to Success

To help you get off to a good start with breastfeeding, lactation consultants recommend following a few vital steps:

Plan ahead “You need to prepare,” says Mary Lofton, a former public relations manager for La Leche League International. “You wouldn’t throw a dinner party without planning the menu, shopping and even preparing dishes ahead of time. Think of those first few breastfeeding sessions as the most important dinner party of your and your baby’s life.” The best way to prepare for this party is by taking a breastfeeding class, either through La Leche League (llli.org) or at a birthing center or hospital.

Choose the right hospital If there’s a “baby-friendly” hospital or birthing center in your area, consider having your baby there. These facilities are certified by the World Health Organization and UNICEF as offering optimal lactation services. (For a list of certified facilities, visit babyfriendlyusa.org.) If you don’t have a site near you, choose a hospital that has certified lactation consultants on staff.

Breastfeed ASAP Most newborns are alert and ready to nurse right after birth but fall into a sleepy period for the next 24 hours or so, which can make it more difficult for them to feed. So let your baby nurse within 30 to 60 minutes of delivery—and be sure to inform the nurses of your intentions before she’s born. Also request that your baby be allowed to “room in” with you throughout your hospital stay so you are able to nurse as often as she wants.

If you have a Cesarean section, ask the nurses to bring your baby to you as soon as possible after delivery. They or your partner may need to help you hold her due to the effects of your anesthesia, but there is no reason you can’t breastfeed.

Common Problems, Tested Solutions

1. Problem: You’ve got pain.
You may feel discomfort when your baby starts to nurse, but it should be mild and short-lived. “Feeling tenderness when the baby latches on is normal,” says Corky Harvey, M.S., R.N., a lactation consultant and co-owner of The Pump Station in Santa Monica and Hollywood, Calif. “But it shouldn’t last for more than 20 seconds.”

Your breasts aren’t the only place you may be uncomfortable: After the baby is born, your uterus starts contracting back to its normal size. These contractions can be painful, and breastfeeding can intensify them: The baby’s sucking stimulates the release of oxytocin, which causes the uterus to contract.

Solution: Be proactive.
If you experience pain that is severe or lasts longer than 20 seconds, make sure your baby is latched on correctly; if she’s not, gently remove her from the breast and start over. Still having problems? Call a lactation consultant.
If your breasts become engorged, nursing or pumping frequently should help relieve the discomfort. Also, apply cool compresses or an ice pack.
To help with uterine pain, you can take acetaminophen or ibuprofen—both are safe while nursing. If you had a
C-section, be sure to take your painkillers. Minimizing pain will make for an easier time breastfeeding.

2. Problem: Your baby nurses all the time.
Because breast milk is digested more easily than formula, breastfed newborns do need to refuel more often than their formula-fed peers. “Breast milk comes prepackaged with its own digestive enzymes,” explains Lori Feldman-Winter, M.D., a member of the American Academy of Pediatrics Executive Committee on Breastfeeding, “so the proteins and other nutrients are more readily absorbed by the infant’s intestines.” This translates to an average of 10 to 12 feedings in 24 hours.

Solution: Go with the flow.
Let your baby set her own meal schedule, and try not to stress about it. “We are a society devoted to efficiency,” Feldman-Winter says. “Bottle-feeding may be more efficient, but if you accept that having a baby will change every single thing about your life, you might not worry so much about how often your breastfed baby wants to eat.”
If you’re wondering whether your baby is nursing for hunger or comfort, don’t. “Sucking triggers milk production,” Harvey explains, “so it’s important to let your baby suckle as often as she wants, regardless of the reason.”

3. Problem: Is she getting enough milk?
When a baby feeds from a bottle, it’s easy to tell exactly how much she’s eating. Unfortunately, that’s not the way it is with the breast.

Solution: Count wet diapers.
Once your milk comes in, usually three days after delivery, your baby should have at least six to eight wet diapers a day. Most breastfed babies will also have at least two yellow, seedy bowel movements every 24 hours. If you have any concerns, call your pediatrician.

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The Later-In-Life Pregnancy

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 20:36:00 GMT

By the age of 43, Jamie Rhein of Columbus, Ohio, thought it was unlikely she'd have a baby. "I had never gotten pregnant," says Rhein, whose adopted daughter was then 9. "My husband and I had been going our merry way with unprotected sex for years." But when Rhein started craving Whopper Jrs., she knew something was up. At an age when many women were parenting teens, she was preparing for a newborn. "I went from shock to being pleased with the idea," says Rhein, now 49.

After her son was born, Rhein discovered that her age gave her an outlook on mothering that she probably wouldn't have had if she were younger. "I don't worry about being the best mother in the world," she says. "I'm able to just enjoy him for who he is. I'm just glad he's here and I'm having this experience."

Midlife baby boom
Record numbers of women over 40 are having babies. In 2005, their birth rate was 9.7 per 1,000, compared with just 3.8 per 1,000 in 1981. Another way of looking at the phenomenon: In 2005, 13 times as many women between the ages of 40 and 45 delivered their first child than had done so in 1975.

"We're seeing over-40 pregnancies more often, and more that are successful," says Barbara O'Brien, M.D., a maternal-fetal medicine specialist and director of perinatal genetics at Women and Infants' Hospital of Rhode Island. Better medical care, including increasingly successful infertility treatment, has improved older women's chances of conceiving and having a healthy baby. Knowing this, older women are more willing to take a chance on pregnancy. (Women over 40 also have an unintended-pregnancy rate that's second only to very young women.)

In some respects, age is an asset, not a liability. "You're so much more emotionally ready to be a parent," says Tracy Gaudet, M.D., executive director of Duke Integrative Medicine in Durham, N.C., and co-author of Body, Soul, and Baby (Bantam). "I see in my older patients that they have more life experience—they're more likely to honor pregnancy as the sacred experience it is."

Legitimate concerns
A later-in-life pregnancy tends to entail more complications, however. "It does pose some substantial concern for women and their babies," says Alan Fleischman, M.D., medical director of the March of Dimes.

Over-40 mothers are between 2 percent and 5 percent more likely than younger women to experience gestational diabetes, placental abnormalities, high blood pressure, miscarriage and stillbirth. Their offspring are at higher risk for genetic disorders, premature birth and low birth weight.

Age can also complicate breastfeeding, says Kathy Leeper, M.D., I.B.C.L.C., medical director of Milkworks, a breastfeeding support center in Lincoln, Neb. In her experience, some older mothers have milk-supply issues, and this is particularly likely in women who needed medical assistance to become or stay pregnant.

Hurdling the age obstacle
Any pregnant woman over 35 is considered of "advanced maternal age," meaning the medical establishment considers her pregnancy at high risk for complications. But that doesn't mean an individual woman is destined to have a problem pregnancy. "It's a label, not a diagnosis," Fleischman says, adding that older women may need a few extra prenatal exams. If you're over 40, you can boost your odds of having a healthy pregnancy by making smart lifestyle choices:

• Be as healthy as you can before you conceive. See your doctor for apre-conception checkup; make sure all your existing health problems, such as diabetes or thyroid problems, are under control; and start taking prenatal vitamins with at least 400 micrograms of folic acid.

• Take extra-good care of yourself during pregnancy. "Eat well, exercise, gain a healthy amount of weight, see your doctor for prenatal visits, and keep your blood pressure and blood sugar under control," O'Brien recommends.

• Give yourself a break when you feel worn out. "Older women are more established in their routines, and they tend to want to continue doing everything they did prior to pregnancy," says Bonnie Berk, R.N., M.S., founder of Motherwell Maternity Fitness in Carlisle, Pa.

• Find a local lactation consultant before delivery so you'll be able to get breastfeeding help quickly.

• A Cesarean isn't your only option. Over-40 mothers are more likely to have a C-section because of their higher rates of multiple births and medical complications, but you shouldn't have one unless it's medically necessary.

•Build a support group of other new mothers, even if they're much younger. You may think you have nothing in common with women half your age, but once you start talking pregnancy, the age difference will matter less.

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The Flexitarian Diet

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 20:24:00 GMT

In the April/May 2008 issue, we gave you tips and recipes that show you how to make the most of your prenatal diet by including more of the things you may not eat on a regular basis—such as more vegetables if you eat a meat-based diet, and more meat and fish if you usually eat vegetarian. Following is a three-day meal plan and snacks that demonstrate just how easy it is to flex your diet.

Meal Plan
To make flexing your diet as easy as possible, here's a three-day meal plan that includes plenty of fruits and vegetables, as well as some meat and fish. Whether you follow it to the letter, or pick and choose the meals that appeal most to you, be assured you're getting quality nutrition in every bite.

Recipes follow for foods marked with a single asterisk(*); vegan substitutions available for foods marked with a double asterisk (**). Nutritional information does not include snacks. During your second and third trimesters, choose two snacks per day from the following list for the additional 300 calories you and your baby need.

Vegan Substitutions**

Intead of	Use
Asiago cheese	soy-based Parmesan
Beef hamburger	soy veggie patty
Beef tenderloin steak	seasoned extra-firm tofu
Butter	trans-fat-free soy or corn-based margarine
Grilled chicken	seasoned soy "chicken-style" strips
Mayonnaise	soy-based mayonnaise
Milk	low-fat soy, almond or rice milk
Parmesan cheese	soy-based Parmesan
Pork tenderloin	teriyaki-flavored, extra-firm baked tofu
Ranch dressing	balsamic vinaigrette
Salmon	increase mushrooms, use soy-based cheese
Water-packed light tuna	1/2 to 2/3 cup garbanzo beans
Yogurt	soy-based yogurt

DAY ONE

Breakfast
1 1/2 cups cooked oatmeal (made with 1% milk) and mixed with 2 tablespoons dried cherries and 2 tablespoons chopped walnuts
1 cup 100% pomegranate juice

Lunch
Crunchy Tuna Wrap: 3 ounces water-packed light tuna** mixed with 1 tablespoon light mayonnaise**, 1 tablespoon chopped onion and 1 tablespoon chopped celery on a whole-wheat flour tortilla (8-inch)
Strawberry Spinach Salad: 2 cups fresh spinach leaves, 1/2 cup sliced strawberries, 2 tablespoons honey-roasted almonds and 2 tablespoons light raspberry vinaigrette dressing
1 kiwi fruit
1/2 cup 1% milk**

Dinner
Chinese Five-Spice Pork Tenderloin*
1 cup cooked whole-wheat couscous
1 teaspoon butter**
1 cup cooked edamame (soybeans)
1 cup 1% milk

Day One Nutritional Information: 2,115 calories, 27% fat (64 g), 50% carbohydrate (268 g), 23% protein (122 g), 35 g fiber, 16.5 mg iron, 1,275 mg calcium, 318 mcg folate, 208 mg vitamin C, 9.5 mg zinc.

DAY TWO

Breakfast
1 cup low-fat vanilla yogurt** mixed with 2 teaspoons ground flax seed and 1 tablespoon wheat germ
1 whole-wheat mini bagel topped with 1 tablespoon almond butter and 1 tablespoon chopped dates
1 cup 100% ruby-red grapefruit juice

Lunch
1 1/2 cups black-bean soup
Chipotle Beef Burger* **
1 cup green, red and yellow bell pepper strips
2 tablespoons light ranch dressing**
1 cup 1% milk**
1/2 cup mango chunks

Dinner
3 ounces grilled chicken breast** seasoned with salt-free lemon-pepper blend
1 cup cooked whole-wheat penne topped with 2 teaspoons grated Parmesan cheese**
1 cup steamed broccoli
1 teaspoon butter**
Red Onion-Orange Salad: 3/4 cup each fresh spinach leaves and romaine, 3 thin slices red onion, 1/2 cup mandarin oranges and 2 teaspoons light balsamic olive oil vinaigrette
1 banana
1 cup 1% milk

Day Two Nutritional Information: 2,200 calories, 25% fat (62 g), 54% carbohydrate (297 g), 21% protein (115 g), 36 g fiber, 17 mg iron, 1,502 mg calcium, 547 mg folate, 609 mg vitamin C, 20 mg zinc.

DAY THREE

Breakfast
Salmon and Portobello Mushroom Frittata* **
1 whole-wheat English muffin
2 teaspoons butter**
1 1/2 cups mixed fresh berries (blackberries, blueberries, raspberries)
1 cup 1% milk**

Lunch
Mediterranean Bean Salad: 4 cups shredded romaine and mixed greens, 1/2 cup cannellini beans, 1/3 cup chopped roasted red bell peppers, 1/3 cup marinated artichoke hearts, 8 grape tomatoes, 5 kalamata olives, 1/4 cup Asiago cheese** and 3 tablespoons light Italian vinaigrette dressing
8 whole-wheat crackers
1 cup red grapes
1/2 cup 1% milk**

Dinner
3 ounces grilled or broiled beef tenderloin steak**
1 medium sweet potato, baked and topped with 2 teaspoons butter** and 1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
1 cup steamed asparagus spears
1 whole-wheat dinner roll
1 teaspoon butter**
1 1/2 cups mixed melon chunks (cantaloupe, honeydew and watermelon)
1 cup 1% milk**

Day Three Nutritional Information: 2,075 calories, 33% fat (76 g), 48% carbohydrate (248 g), 19% protein (98 g), 41 g fiber, 19.5 mg iron, 1,720 mg calcium, 591 mcg folate, 160 mg vitamin C, 15 mg zinc.

Recipes

Chinese Five-Spice Pork Tenderloin

Chipotle Beef Burgers

Salmon and Portobello Mushroom Frittata

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The Best-Laid Plan

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 20:14:00 GMT

My birth plan when I was pregnant with my son, Truman, was this: I had no plan. I knew I wanted a hospital delivery, so I selected one that had a birth center known for family friendliness and an OB-GYN with a reputation for erring on the side of safety. Beyond that, I just packed my iPod in my hospital bag, let my doctor know that I'd rather skip the C-section, thank you, and trusted that somehow the process of giving birth would take care of itself.

My friend Lynn was shocked by my nonchalance. "Oh, my God!" she said. "You have to have a birth plan!" Lynn had wanted—and, after 51 hours of labor, got—a completely natural delivery. She firmly believes that her no-detail-overlooked birth plan helped her enjoy the childbirth experience she wanted. "If you don't have a birth plan," she warned me, "you forfeit control of this beautiful, natural process to the medical system."

Oh no! Just as I started to panic—and cobble together a detailed birth plan at 38 weeks—my friend Jeanette, an ultrapractical mother of four, offered another point of view. "Don't bother," she advised. "Birth plans don't work. Something always goes wrong, and you'll just have to trash the whole thing anyway. Why set yourself up for failure?"

So who was right? Turns out, both—and neither. "Birth plans are useful because they help couples think through the process together and decide what's most important to them," says Sharon Phelan, M.D., an OB-GYN who practices at the University of New Mexico in Albuquerque. "Some women like a high-tech birth; others have a Pearl Buck image of motherhood. Either way is fine, but it helps to have those expectations expressed so everyone understands what the goal is." But Phelan also warns that while you can try to guide it, childbirth is something you simply can't fully control, so don't even try. Here are some additional tips from Phelan and other experts for making your birth plan work for you.

Start shopping early
Create your birth plan early in your pregnancy, use it to "shop" for a care provider whose vision most closely matches yours and make sure that person knows about any special concerns you may have, suggests Cynthia Flynn, C.N.M.,

Ph.D., an associate professor of nursing at Seattle University in Washington and president of the American Association of Birth Centers. "When you show up in the delivery room with a birth plan, you're saying that you don't trust your provider to do it your way," Flynn maintains. "Why not just find someone who normally does it your way?"

Keep it short and sweet
A cursory Web search will turn up any number of lengthy checklist-style plans to help you start the process, but Phelan suggests not getting too detailed (see "5 Key Questions," on page 2, for topics to focus on). "There's a grim joke among care providers that the minute we see a three-page, single-spaced birth plan, we get the OR ready because we know it will all go wrong," Phelan says. "It happens so often, there must be something to it. I think the more attached you get to certain fixed ideas, the more likely you are to tense up around them, and the natural process has more difficulty happening." Bottom line: Keep your plan to a page, max.

Research your baby's birthplace
Once you choose a doctor or midwife and the hospital or birth center where you'll deliver, do a little research into its policies to find out if they're basically OK with your wishes. But be realistic: "Every hospital has their own way of doing things, and nurses—the ones who are there with you throughout your labor—do their best to articulate between the patient's wishes and the care providers' orders, while staying within the bounds of hospital policy," says Lindsay Rogers, C.C.A., B.S.N., R.N., a labor nurse at St. Mary's Hospital in Knoxville, Tenn.

If you do have a detailed plan in mind, Rogers suggests taking it in ahead of your delivery and discussing it with the charge nurse to see where the sticky parts might be. And have your doctor sign your plan prior to admittance. "Your doctor might say it's fine for you to have no IV, but unless he writes that as an order, the hospital policy will win out and you'll get one anyway," Rogers says. "If it really matters to you, get it in writing."

Watch your language
What you do write down, write with care. "Care providers appreciate language that lets them know you're working together as a team and you respect their professional judgment," says Bruce Flamm, M.D., a clinical professor of obstetrics at the University of California, Irvine and spokesman for the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. "You should express your goals and desires in a way that's not contentious so that it doesn't set up a boxing match," Flamm adds. "Would you like it if somebody with no training in your field did some Internet research and then came in to tell you how to do you job?"

Take it with a grain
New York City midwife Elizabeth Stein, C.N.M., M.S.N., M.P.H., has delivered more than 2,500 babies in her 22 years in practice and estimates she's seen it all. In her opinion, birth plans are best viewed as a wish list. "You have to wait and see how labor goes to have any clear idea about what you really want or need," she says. "You may think you don't want any pain medicines, but then find you really need them. Don't start motherhood out feeling guilty, or feeling that your expectations weren't met." Instead, Stein encourages her patients to aim high and focus on what's most important: "We always shoot for a healthy mom and a healthy baby."

What mom doesn't go into the delivery room thinking the same way? I did—and offered up my 11th-hour birth plan in the sincere hope that it would somehow help ease my labor and my baby's transition into the world. It was literally too little, too late—not that it mattered much anyway. I ended up needing a C-section, a disappointment but—in hindsight—far from a disaster: Truman and I are safe and healthy today.

5 Key Questions
Sample birth plans offer the illusion of control over everything from the light level in your hospital room to whether you'll have a C-section. The reality of childbirth, however, seldom lines up with these neat little boxes. New York City midwife Elizabeth Stein recommends avoiding yes/no questions and writing open-ended answers to these five crucial questions:
1) If labor begins naturally, when would you like to be admitted?
2) Are you willing to be induced?
3) What is your attitude toward pain relief?
4) Who do you want in the room with you when you deliver and/or need a C-section?
5) What are your desires in regard to breastfeeding?

To create and print a birth plan based on "5 Key Questions" in this article, go to fitpregnancy.com/birthplans.

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Tea For Two

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 20:04:00 GMT

The ritual of making and drinking tea has been practiced for tens of thousands of years, and for good reason. It's a calming and low-calorie treat any time, and one with countless health benefits. The polyphenols in tea protect your heart, while the antioxidants may lower your risk of cancer. Some varieties even contain nutrients that boost your immune system.

Best of all for you right now, there are benefits to drinking certain teas when you're expecting. A comforting cup may ease morning sickness, help you fall asleep and even make for a shorter labor. However, some types are potentially dangerous and should be avoided during pregnancy.

Helpful Herbals
"Herbal teas can help hydrate the body when women tire of drinking plain water," says Amelia Hirota, D.Ac., an herbalist and acupuncturist at The Center of Balance in East Greenwich, R.I. And some provide important pregnancy nutrients, including calcium, magnesium and iron. Rooibos tea, in particular, is a good one to try because of its antioxidant properties; it's also caffeine free.

Other herbal teas may help alleviate morning sickness (ginger and mint), prevent insomnia (chamomile) and promote more effective contractions during labor (red raspberry leaf). "Many midwives and herbalists believe that raspberry leaf tones the uterine muscle, which may help make contractions more efficient," says Hirota.

Hirota also recommends tea made from nettle leaf (also known as stinging nettles), an herb commonly found in pregnancy teas and recommended by many herbalists and midwives. "It's a fabulous source of vitamins and minerals, including iron, vitamins A, C and K, and potassium," she says. However, make sure any nettle tea you drink uses the dried leaves, not the root (the label should list nettle leaf), and don't drink too much, especially in the first trimester, because of its stimulating effect on the uterus. However, it is safe to drink throughout the second and third trimesters, Hirota says. To make it, add one ounce of dried nettle leaf to a quart of boiling water. >>

Teas to Avoid
Some herbal teas are unsafe when you're expecting; these include PMS, diet, cleansing and detoxification teas, as well as those with the herbs black cohosh, blue cohosh, Dong Quai and more (for a complete list, go to fit pregnancy.com/tea).

Also avoid herbal laxatives, so read tea labels carefully. "In high doses, some naturally occurring substances, such as rhubarb, cascara sagrada, aloe or senna, can cause changes in electrolytes," says Laurie Green, M.D., an obstetrician in San Francisco. (Electrolytes, which include chloride, sodium and potassium, are required for normal cell and organ functioning.) These herbal laxatives can promote diuresis (increased urination) or diarrhea, both of which can cause dehydration, says Green. Such varieties are best avoided until after you deliver and finish breastfeeding; even then, use caution.

The Caffeine Connection
Unlike herbal teas, which contain only about 0.4 milligrams of caffeine per cup, nonherbal teas (black, green and oolong) contain about 40 to 50 milligrams per cup. Sip four or five cups throughout the day, and you've gotten about 200 milligrams of caffeine. A recent study from Kaiser Permanente's Northern California Division of Research found that pregnant women who consumed more than 200 milligrams of caffeine daily had double the risk of miscarriage compared with those who avoided the stimulant.

Even at that level, some obstetricians, including Green, claim it's safe to drink caffeinated tea during pregnancy. "The caffeine issue has been overblown," she says. In fact, a study conducted by the National Institutes of Health found no association between intakes of up to 350 milligrams of caffeine and miscarriage.

Nevertheless, most experts agree it's best to use caution and limit caffeine intake if you can. "Caffeine in any form is too stimulating during pregnancy," says Hirota. "It also increases the load on the liver, which is already busy processing pregnancy hormones."

Pregnancy Teas
These varieties are considered safe based on information from the Natural Medicines Database.

Earth Mama Angel Baby: Peaceful Mama Tea, Morning Wellness Tea and Third Trimester tea, earthmamaangelbaby.com. Republic of Tea: Get Maternal/Be Well Red Tea, republicoftea.com. Tea for Two Pregnancy Tea, fairhavenhealth.com. Traditional Medicinals: Organic Pregnancy Tea, traditionalmedicinals.com.

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Surrounded by Support

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 20:02:00 GMT

For the best possible delivery, surround yourself with people who understand that giving birth is a heroic, if painful, act that benefits those who embrace its challenge. Our cultural tendency to eliminate pain from this rite of passage negates women's physical and emotional powers, says childbirth educator Kathy McGrath, M.S.W., L.C.C.E. When pain is lessened, the mother's sense of accomplishment is also diminished, she believes. Birth involves both agony and ecstasy, she says, and "when we dull and diminish one, the unintended result is we often dull and diminish the other."

Ironically, a woman who chooses medication early in labor may need the most support from birth attendants to help her stay aware of and emotionally connected to the birthing process. Caregivers and family members who think how a baby is born doesn't matter, as long as he's healthy, are missing the point, according to McGrath. Women are meant to emerge from childbirth filled with confidence, exhilaration and a sense of capability. Having only genuinely supportive caregivers present at the birth can improve birth experiences, she says: "The psychological impact of birth, be it positive or negative, can last a lifetime. The only people who should be there are those who really make [the mom] feel strong."

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Supermarket Road Map

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 19:56:00 GMT

Now that you're expecting, your body's nutritional needs are changing, and so will your grocery list. Take along our handy aisle-by-aisle guide to find the best sources of the nutrients you need to ensure a healthy pregnancy — and a healthy baby.

PRODUCE

Where folate flourishes
Start your shopping trip in the fresh-produce department, where finding nutrient-dense foods is a no-brainer. Fruits and vegetables are excellent sources of folate, a B vitamin that helps manufacture and maintain new cells and is especially vital for the rapid cell division that takes place during pregnancy. Deficiencies can contribute to serious birth defects of the spine and brain (aka neural tube defects such as spina bifida).

"Before you get pregnant and during the first trimester are when getting folate counts the most," says Heather Blazier, R.D., L.D., a clinical dietitian who specializes in pregnancy, labor and delivery at the Medical College of Georgia in Augusta. "The neural tube develops very early in pregnancy, starting in the fourth week."

Folate occurs naturally in food, while folic acid is the synthetic form found in fortified foods and supplements. "Food is always a more absorbable source of vitamins and minerals," Blazier adds. The recommended daily intake for pregnant women is 400 to 600 micrograms.

The produce department also is a goldmine when it comes to vitamin C and fiber. Vitamin C helps strengthen your body's membranes, including the amniotic membranes (rupture can lead to preterm delivery). For more on fiber's role during pregnancy, see "Cereal, Bread & Pasta" (below).

Stock up on your favorites and try some new foods, too, to get a variety of beneficial pregnancy nutrients.

Smart Picks for Folate
Green vegetables (1 cup each) Spinach: 263 mcg; mustard greens: 105 mcg; asparagus: 268 mcg; broccoli: 57 mcg
Fruit Guava (1 medium, about 6 ounces): 81 mcg; papaya (1 cup cubes): 53 mcg; strawberries (1 cup): 37 mcg; navel orange (1 cup sections): 48 mcg
More sources of folate Fortified cereals such as Kellogg's All-Bran (393 mcg per 1/2 cup) or Wheat Chex (390 mcg per 1 cup); cooked beans such as lentils (358 mcg per 1 cup); calcium- and vitamin D-fortified orange juice (45 mcg per 1 cup); cooked beets (136 mcg per 1 cup)

BUTCHER

Iron & protein aplenty
The meat department is home to almost unlimited sources of iron and protein, two pregnancy must-haves. Protein is the major structural component of all the cells in the body, and it's essential for the fetus's organ and muscle development. During pregnancy, your daily protein intake increases to 71 grams. To support the rise in your own blood volume and prevent anemia (a decrease in red blood cells), you also need to increase your iron intake to 27 g daily.

Smart Picks for Iron & Protein Beef, round, top round, London broil (3 ounces) 3 milligrams iron, 31 g protein
Duck (1 cup, chopped) 4 mg iron, 33 g protein
Beef liver (2.8 ounces) 5 mg iron, 21 g protein
Pork tenderloin (3 ounces) 1.2 mg iron, 24 g protein Skinless chicken breast (3 ounces) 0.6 mg iron, 18 g protein
More sources of iron and protein Kidney beans (1 cup cooked): 5 mg iron, 16 g protein; quinoa (2 ounces): 6 mg iron, 8 g protein; sunflower seed kernels (1 cup): 3 mg iron, 10 g protein
FISH

Swimming in omega-3s
Although you should limit or avoid eating certain types of fish during pregnancy, there are still plenty of healthful options in the seafood department. There you can find lean sources of protein and healthful omega-3 fatty acids. "Studies have shown that [omega-3 fatty acids] are an important nutrient for the development and health of the fetal nervous system, heart and eyes," says Jennifer Wider, M.D., medical advisor to the Society for Women's Health Research in Washington, D.C. You need about 1.4 g a day.

There is also some evidence that omega-3s may lower the risk of preterm birth and postpartum depression. However, pregnant women need to restrict or eliminate certain fish from their diet because of mercury contamination. Visit gotmercury.org to find the healthiest seafood choices.

Smart Picks for Omega-3s
Wild Pacific salmon (3 ounces) 1.4 g
Trout (3 ounces) 8 g
Oysters (3 ounces, steamed) 3 g
More sources of omega-3s Walnuts (1 ounce): 2.6 g; canola oil (1 tablespoon): 1.3 g; flaxseed (1 tablespoon): 1.6 g; cooked sardines (3 ounces): 1.2 g

DAIRY

Your calcium connection
If you don't get 1,000 mg of this mineral daily, your growing baby is going to leach calcium from your bones, increasing your risk for fractures of the hip, spine and wrist as you age. Make sure your picks in this section are vitamin D-fortified as well as calcium-rich. "Vitamin D helps your body absorb the calcium," explains Blazier. Dairy products also are an excellent source of protein, and many low-fat options exist.

If you don't eat dairy products, focus on the nondairy sources listed below in "More Sources of Calcium."

Smart Picks for Dairy
Low-fat yogurt, any flavor (1 cup) 419 mg calcium, 12 g protein
2% milk (1 cup) 314 mg calcium, 9 g protein
Calcium-fortified soymilk (1 cup) 368 mg calcium, 5 g protein
More sources of calcium Almonds (1 ounce): 70 mg; canned salmon with bones (3 ounces): 188 mg; calcium- and vitamin D-fortified orange juice (1 cup): 351 mg; Total Raisin Bran (1 cup):1,000 mg

CERALS, BREADS & PASTA Fiber-filled

Your increased iron intake (as well as pregnancy itself) can lead to constipation. Fiber-rich foods and lots of water are the antidote. "Fiber is the indigestible part of food," explains Blazier. "It can help lower cholesterol, promote gastrointestinal health and increase [food's] 'transit time' for pregnant women who are experiencing constipation." The whole grains in certain kinds of bread, pasta, rice and cereal will help you reach your dietary fiber goal of 28 g daily.

Smart Picks for Fiber
Whole-grain bread or crackers Whole-wheat English muffins (1 muffin): 4 g; whole-wheat pita (1 large): 5 g; Rye Krisp (1 cracker): 4 g
Whole grains Whole-wheat spaghetti (1 cup): 6 g; bulgar (1 cup): 8 g; brown rice (1 cup): 4 g
Breakfast cereals Cheerios (1 cup): 3 g; Total Raisin Bran (1 cup): 5 g; Wheatena (1 cup): 7 g
More sources of fiber Raspberries (1 cup): 8 g; pear (1 small): 4 g; summer squash (1 cup mashed): 5 g; white beans (1 cup cooked): 19 g
The Lowdown on Deli Meat
Deli meats and hot dogs can transmit listeriosis, a bacterial infection whose symptoms include headache, muscle ache, fever, nausea and vomiting, stiff neck and convulsions. Listeria bacteria are especially hazardous for pregnant women because infection can result in miscarriage, premature delivery or illness in your newborn. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, pregnant women are 20 times more likely to become infected with listeria than non-pregnant adults; it is most common during the third trimester, when the mother's immune system is most suppressed.

If you do eat hot dogs or luncheon or deli meats, make sure they have been reheated to steaming (160° F) to kill the bacteria. At sandwich shops, order non-luncheon meat fare such as meatballs, steak and cheese or roasted chicken.

Daily 10

Nutrients For A Healthy Pregnancy

Calcium Daily dose 1,000 mg Best sources dairy foods such as cheese, low-fat yogurt and milk
Carbohydrates Daily dose 175 g Best sources vegetables and whole grains
Fiber Daily dose 28 g Best sources fruit; legumes; seeds; whole grains
Fluids Daily dose 91 ounces Best sources water; fruit and 100 percent fruit juice; vegetables
Folate Daily dose 400-600 mcg Best sources fruit; fortified cereal; leafy greens; calcium- and vitamin D-fortified orange juice
Iron Daily dose 27 mg Best sources beans; beef; beef liver; clams
Omega-3s Daily dose 1.4 g Best sources fatty fish, such as wild Pacific salmon, mackerel and anchovies; omega-3-fortified eggs; vegetable oils such as soybean, canola and flaxseed oils
Protein Daily dose 71 g Best sources cheese; eggs; fish; meat; milk; poultry; yogurt
Vitamin C Daily dose 85 mg Best sources fruit and 100 percent fruit juice; vegetables
Vitamin D Daily dose 5 mcg Best sources enriched milk, soymilk and cereals; sunshine

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Real Life Stories: Home Births

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 19:51:00 GMT

More and more women are defying convention and doctors' guidelines and choosing to have their babies at home. Here, three women talk about the ups and downs of delivering their way.

"I was happy to be in my own bed. But let's face it: Birth without drugs sucks."
Mardi Douglass, Seattle

I gave birth to my first son without pain medication at a birthing center. I found out the most surprising thing about birth is the pain. Let's face it: Birth without drugs sucks.

When I got pregnant again, I swore I wouldn't do that again, but I couldn't bring myself to give birth in a hospital without a midwife. So I decided to do it at home.

I spent most of my labor kneeling on the floor with my arms on our bed. I felt more present than I was during my first birth and made a conscious choice about how I was going to react to the pain. When the midwife arrived, we moved to the bed and Tanner was born shortly thereafter. The most painful part is when the baby's head is coming through your cervix, but it's also a good feeling because the next sensation is feeling the baby completely out of your body; and the pain is gone.

I was so happy when it was over and very happy that I was in my own bed. And, I didn't have to drive to a birthing center while in labor. Overall, the four hours of painful labor relative to nine months of meaningful care from a midwife was worth it.

"I didn't want to be in a hospital where there are people I don't know. It just didn't feel right."
Elizabeth Halpern, Los Angeles

During my first pregnancy, we went to a birthing class at a local yoga studio. The midwife who taught the class said the most important thing was to have your baby in a place where you feel the strongest and most confident. So, I thought, I need to be home. I didn't want to be in a hospital where there are people I don't know and they are telling me what to do. It just didn't feel right.

My first labor at home was long. For my second, I was sure we would have a water birth, but everything moved so fast we didn't have time to fill up the birthing tub. The pain was also very different. It was harsh and quick compared with the dull and drawn-out pain of my first labor and delivery.

As soon as my 5-year-old son, Hudson, found out we were having a baby, he was steadfast about wanting to help with the birth. I delivered his brother, Winston, lying on the cement floor of our loft. The first thing Hudson did when Winston was born was sit next to me and ask, "Mommy, are you so happy to finally have your baby?"

"After three hours of pushing, I knew something was wrong. We couldn't figure out why my daughter, Harper, wasn't coming out."
Renee Pietrangelo-Brown, Los Angeles

When I got pregnant, I started going to the doctor and it never crossed my mind to have a home birth. But one day, I thought: "Why am I going to the doctor? I don't have a medical condition. I'm just pregnant." I started interviewing midwives and I realized that it was a completely different experience. I felt empowered.

Early in my labor, my two midwives arrived at my house and we went for a long walk. Walking through my contractions actually made them a lot easier to deal with. When I was 10 centimeters dilated, the midwives broke my water and I started pushing. I tried squatting on the floor while holding onto the side of the bed, and then I tried sitting on the toilet. The baby just wouldn't drop. And, I was in so much pain, I was screaming.

After three hours of pushing, I knew something was wrong. My daughter, Harper, wasn't coming out. The midwives called and told the hospital we were coming. When I got there, they gave me an epidural right away. Then they backed off on the pain medication and I pushed for another 90 minutes. I tried different positions and she still didn't come out. The doctor suggested I have a C-section and I started bawling. I thought, "I'm not good enough. I can't even push out my own baby."

The experience taught me a lot. No matter how much you want things to go one way, you have to remember it's not just about you anymore. It's about you and your baby.

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Should You Go Organic?

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 19:41:00 GMT

The thought of pesticide residues, antibiotics and toxic chemicals lurking in your food probably didn’t keep you up at night before you became pregnant. But now that you’re eating for two, you may feel compelled to buy the safest foods available. In fact, a recent survey from The Hartman Group, a think tank in Bellevue, Wash., revealed that having children is the most significant trigger for “going organic.” And, thanks to a burgeoning $9-billion-a-year industry, organic products are flooding the marketplace. The question is, now that such products are so readily available, is it time for you, too, to go organic?

A question of safety
The hallmark of organic food is that it is grown via environmentally friendly farming techniques. In lieu of synthetic substances, natural fertilizers are used, as are biological predators like ladybugs to manage pests. To earn the U.S. Department of Agriculture’s (USDA’s) organic certification, farmland must be free from prohibited substances (pesticides, artificial fertilizers, etc.) for at least three years, and organic animal products must come from animals raised without hormones or antibiotics, explains Kathleen Merrigan, Ph.D., director of the agriculture, food and environment program at the Friedman School of Nutrition Science and Policy at Tufts University in Boston. But is organic food automatically better for you and your developing baby? That depends on who you ask. A recent study from the University of California, Davis, found that organically grown berries and corn contain nearly 60 percent more polyphenolics, natural antioxidants that may improve your health. The theory: Crops grown without pesticides or herbicides produce more of these chemicals due to stress from insects or other pests, similar to the way humans build antibodies to ward off bacterial “bugs.” Even so, agencies such as the USDA and the American Dietetic Association stand behind their claims that organic foods are not nutritionally superior or safer than conventionally produced food. “There are no definitive studies that organic is better for you,” Merrigan says. “Instead, we rely on intuition that food from an environmentally sound system is probably healthier.” It’s probably superior for your baby, too. Though no data suggest that food treated with antibiotics or pesticides will harm a fetus, several agencies have called for more studies on the long-term health effects of these substances.

Best Bang for your Organic Buck
Despite the obvious environmental benefits and perceived health effects, expense stands in the way of many people going “all organic.” So the question becomes which organic foods to buy.
With fruits and vegetables the most pesticide-laden (see “The Dirty Dozen” at left), organic versions of these products now account for more than 40 percent of organic-food sales. Some produce such as apples and berries are more vulnerable to pests (and therefore more pesticide-protected) than “cleaner” produce like bananas, oranges and broccoli. But despite the price (organic baby spinach usually costs about 50 cents more per pound; organic carrots, 20 cents more), an organic label doesn’t guarantee that foods are pesticide-free. According to the USDA, 23 percent of organic produce contain pesticide residues. These chemicals can come from substances in the soil (some of which have been banned for decades but remain in the ground) or drift onto organic crops from nearby fields.
When it comes to livestock, conventionally raised animals are given hormones and antibiotics to prevent disease, enhance growth and increase milk production. Organically raised livestock don’t receive such treatments, and their feed is all-organic.
While your baby is developing, you’re right to want to eat the best foods possible, and choosing organic food makes sense if your budget allows. But remember, the most important thing is to maintain a healthy diet during pregnancy without making yourself crazy in the process.

The Dirty Dozen
Below are the top 12 most pesticide-laden foods when grown conventionally: 1. Peaches 2. Strawberries 3. Apples 4. Spinach 5. Nectarines 6. Celery 7. Pears 8. Cherries 9. Potatoes 10. Raspberries 11. Sweet bell peppers 12.Grapes (imported) From a study by the Environmental Working Group, a nonprofit research organization

Where to buy organic These days, you don’t have to look far to find organic food. Here are three great shopping options:
1. Farmers market The number of farmers markets featuring organic produce has nearly doubled since the government began tracking them in 1994; to find one near you, visit www.ams.usda.gov/farmersmarkets.
2. Natural- or specialty-food store Look for a Whole Foods (www.whole foods.com), Wild Oats (www.wild oats.com) or Trader Joe’s (www.trader joes.com) store in your area.
3. Online grocer www.diamond organics.com delivers to your door.

*fastfact
Up to 80 percent of nonorganic processed foods like crackers and cookies contain a component, such as canola oil, from a genetically modified crop. Some scientists argue that gene transfer introduces food allergens and disturbs the natural order of the environment.

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Prep for Mommy Brain

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 19:34:00 GMT

They call it “momnesia”: those times you put the milk in the cupboard instead of the refrigerator; or you walk into a room, only to forget why you’re there. But “mommy brain” is more than a punch line, says Shoshana Bennett, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist in San Ramon, Calif., who specializes in prenatal and postpartum counseling. Experts say it’s a very real neurological issue resulting from powerful endocrine and brain chemistry changes. Fortunately, Bennett says, you can take steps to minimize the impact of mommy brain:

>Trimester 1 Start eating brain food

Eating foods high in tryptophan (a precursor to serotonin, a neurotransmitter that can boost brainpower), including oats, bananas and turkey, can improve memory. Apples, blueberries and onions contain a memory-boosting flavonoid called quercetin, and lean protein foods provide key amino acids that function as neurotransmitters.

>Trimester 2 Establish healthy sleep habits

As little as 5 ½ hours straight can give you a full sleep cycle, which is ideal. If you’re still feeling drowsy, try a power nap: Research shows these quick snoozes can improve brain function and memory.

>Trimester 3 Develop a structure

Baby’s arrival can create organizational havoc. To prepare, get your home ready by deciding on a place to put your purse, keys, diaper bag and other essentials every time you walk in the door. Also, starting a list-making habit can be a lifesaver.

>Throughout pregnancy Get your game on

Research shows that video games in which you problem solve or work through patterns, like Nintendo’s Brain Age, Popcap’s Bejeweled or your newspaper’s Sudoku puzzle, can improve memory and brain function.

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Pregnancy-Inspired Careers

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 19:30:00 GMT

Are you searching for a rewarding career, one that's working-mother friendly? Look no further than your growing belly, and let pregnancy and childbirth inspire you.

That's what Jennifer Powers did when she became pregnant in 2004. "I knew my job as a financial analyst wouldn't be a good fit for me once my baby was born," says the 34-year-old mom from Cambridge, Mass., citing such drawbacks as high-priced child care and a company culture in which 10-hour workdays were the norm.

It was when she attended childbirth preparation classes that Powers discovered her dream job. "As the instructor explained the intricacies of labor and delivery, I kept thinking, 'I want to be a childbirth educator,'" she recalls.

Powers enrolled in a home-study program and earned her childbirth educator certification before her son reached his first birthday. "I love my new career," she reports. "Working with expectant parents, I get to share their joy and anticipation. And because classes meet in the evenings, my husband is home to care for our son while I teach."

Many maternity-related professions offer flexible hours, fulfilling responsibilities and the opportunity to help other women make the transition to motherhood. As you plan your own future as a working mom, consider whether one of these careers might be your perfect fit. (Organizations listed here offer further training and certification information.)

Childbirth Educator (CBE)
The basics Childbirth educators teach moms- and dads-to-be general what-to-expect classes or specialize in such topics as natural pain relief. Those who offer private classes charge between $200 and $650 per couple for a six-week course. CBEs who teach in a hospital setting typically make $30 to $50 per class. Certification requirements include completing home-study course work, observing experienced childbirth educators and teaching a practice class.

Contact International Childbirth Educators Associ-ation; icea.org; 952-854-8660.

Doula
The basics "I mother the mother-to-be," says Julie Six, 26, a certified doula from Swayzee, Ind. "I stay by a woman's side throughout labor, offering encouragement, informational support and comfort." But the nature of doula work means the hours are often unpredictable. "Dependable child care is a must when you are on call," Six says. Most doulas attend one or two births a month, with fees ranging from $500 to $1,200.

To earn certified-doula status, a woman must complete a basic childbirth course and provide labor assistance to a minimum of three clients. If you prefer a more conventional work schedule, postpartum doulas provide such services as light housecleaning, meal preparation and daytime or overnight newborn care. They generally charge $15 to $25 per hour.

Contact Doulas of North America; dona.org; 888-788-3662.

Labor and Delivery Nurse
The basics "I care for women during all stages of labor, delivery and the immediate postpartum period — essentially anything related to pregnancy that requires a trip to the maternity ward," says Jeanne Faulkner, 46, a labor and delivery nurse in Portland, Ore., and a mom of five. "If you can, work part time or on call so you have more control over your hours," Faulkner adds. Nurses typically make $25 to $40 per hour. Education prerequisites include a B.S. or A.S. degree in nursing.

Contact Association of Women's Health, Obstetric, and Neonatal Nurses; awhonn.org; 800-673-8499.

Lactation Consultant (LC)
The basics You might find yourself teaching a breastfeeding class to expectant mothers, helping a newborn latch on properly to the breast or answering questions from a nursing mother who just returned to work. For Kelly Emery, I.B.C.L.C., 38, a lactation consultant in Grand Rapids, Mich., the job's most rewarding aspect is reassuring a mother that her breastfed baby is thriving. "When I hear the baby swallowing and can teach the mother how to recognize this sound, she is usually incredibly relieved and amazed," Emery says. "You can just see her shoulders relax."

Lactation consultants typically complete a combination of college-level courses and hands-on work before receiving certification. Most work is in a hospital or clinic setting, with pay ranging from $25 to $40 an hour.

Contact International Lactation Consult-ant Association; ilca.org; 919-861-5577.

Prenatal Fitness Instructor
The basics If you love working out, put your fitness skills to good use by leading prenatal aerobics, yoga or Pilates classes. "Yoga helped me get in touch with my body — and my baby — during pregnancy," says Michelle Hill, 38, a prenatal-yoga instructor in New York. "Now I teach it to other pregnant women," adds the mother of two, whose daily work schedule permits her to be home by noon. Pay generally ranges between $50 and $100 per class.

To obtain basic prenatal-fitness certification, you must complete independent course work and attend a training workshop. For certification in yoga or Pilates, you will need to attend specialty seminars in those areas.

Contact Aerobics & Fitness Association of America; afaa.com; 877-968-7263.

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Baby Owner's Manual

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 19:24:00 GMT

CONGRATULATIONS!
You are the proud owner of a 2009/2010 model child. Your offspring has been issued a Social Security number (SSN) for registration purposes. Please present this number when product needs servicing. To identify make and model, locate adapter between lower appendages. If adapter is female (XX), you have a beautiful baby girl. If adapter is male (XY), a bouncing baby boy is yours.
NOTE: A complimentary head protector covers the XY model's adapter. Removal is at the owner's discretion.
WARNING FOR OWNERS OF XX MODEL! Beautiful is a relative term.
WARNING FOR OWNERS OF XY MODEL! Do not attempt to actually bounce baby.

PACKAGING
Baby comes wrapped in protective coating. Do not sign for delivery if this layer is missing or appears to have been tampered with. All extraneous material, including placenta, is not reusable and must be properly disposed of. A fuel line (UBC) connects model to host unit. Only a licensed representative should disconnect cord. Product should operate as a cordless unit for the duration of its lifetime. Batteries should not be inserted into baby.

WARNINGS!

Do Not use baby to block heating or cooling vents.
Do Not store foreign objects in baby's openings.
Do Not attempt to fold or compress baby into small spaces.

HELPFUL HINTS

• Gently jiggling baby in an up/down motion and patting on spine can remove air bubbles.
• For the first six months, power source can be sustained with FDA-approved formula (not included) or unpasteurized calcium and vitamin D source provided by mother unit.
• When programming and communicating with baby, exaggerating and articulating language with movement, as when talking with a foreigner, is recommended.
• Baby will not become self-cleaning for at least two years. It is recommended that porous surfaces be wiped at least twice a day and whenever leakage occurs. Unit may be lubricated using baby lotion, diaper cream or other nontoxic solvent.

TROUBLESHOOTING
Problem Baby won't shut down.
Try producing melodic and somniferous sound waves and repositioning unit using a pendulum motion.
Problem Baby leaks and discharges.
Try changing vacuum-sealed disposal bag (not included).
Problem Baby is not desired make or model.
Try living with this common problem. Do not try to change gender of model by attaching or removing X or Y parts.
Problem Baby does not resemble father unit.
Try calling local service center for confirmation of compatible programming code. Or skip previous step and get over it.

WARRANTY AND LIMITATIONS OF LIABILITY
WARRANTY FOR FULL RETURN WILL TERMINATE AT THE END OF ONE YEAR, AFTER WHICH TIME RESALE AND RELOCATION BECOME DIFFICULT. OWNER IS RESPONSIBLE FOR INDIRECT, SPECIAL, INCIDENTAL AND CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES CAUSED BY THE ABOVE MENTIONED UNDER ANY LEGAL AUTHORITY, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO DAMAGE TO PUBLIC AND/OR PRIVATE PROPERTY, HAVOC WREAKED ON MARRIAGE, AND LOST PROFITS, YOUTH, HAIR, LEISURE TIME AND SANITY. OWNER WILL COVER ALL COSTS OF DAMAGE TO AND MAINTANANCE OF DATA PROGRAMMED AND STORED IN SYSTEM OF PROCESSOR UNTIL EXPIRATION DATE OF EIGHTEEN (18) YEARS DESPITE PRODUCT'S INDIVIDUAL CLAIMS OF AUTONOMY.

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Of Fat and Fertility

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 19:20:00 GMT

When Ronda Kelly, A 5-foot-5-inch jewelry designer in Portland, Ore., began trying to get pregnant more than three years ago, she weighed 110 pounds and hadn't had a menstrual period in 15 years. Gaining just 8 additional pounds helped Kelly, then 34, start having regular periods again, yet it still took a total of a year of trying and, finally, intra-uterine insemination to conceive her daughter, Lauren, now 2 1/2.

Before she gained weight, Kelly's body mass index (BMI) was 18.3. But the ideal BMI for conception is 20 to 25. Being either underweight, as Kelly was, or overweight can cause problems with ovulation as well as other conditions that make conceiving difficult. Recent studies indicate that if you're overweight, it can even be harder to get pregnant by means of high-tech methods such as in vitro fertilization.

"If body weight and body fat are either too high or too low, estrogen and progesterone concentrations in the body go down," explains Nancy Williams, Sc.D., an associate professor of kinesiology at the Pennsylvania State University in University Park. "An adequate estrogen level is needed to stimulate ovulation." Underweight women can have regular menstrual bleeding, but the cycles are likely to be anovulatory, which means ovulation doesn't occur.

Low progesterone levels can affect the luteal phase, the second half of your menstrual cycle. Having a luteal phase disturbance (LPD) means you might ovulate normally and fertilization occurs, but there's not enough time for the fertilized egg to properly implant in your uterus. Getting your period less than 10 days after you ovulate (as determined by an ovulation kit or a blood test) is a red flag for an LPD.

Not too big, not too small
Weighing too much can make conceiving as difficult as weighing too little. "Overweight and obesity exacerbate a host of things, such as causing anovulatory infertility and diminishing the response to fertility medications," says Richard S. Legro, M.D., a professor of obstetrics and gynecology at the Pennsylvania State University College of Medicine in Hershey.

One problem caused by excess weight is insulin resistance. Women with this condition have higher levels of free androgens (male hormones) and free estrogen that can adversely affect ovulation and embryo implantation. A certain level of hormones is needed to promote a healthy uterine lining, or endometrium. When there is more tissue (read: fat) to "soak up" those hormones, the endometrium is deprived of them.

Polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS), one of the leading causes of infertility, is worsened by obesity and insulin resistance. "All women with PCOS have ovulatory dysfunction that becomes more severe as weight increases," Legro says. However, not all overweight or obese women have PCOS, and not all women with PCOS are overweight. The classic signs of PCOS are irregular periods and excess body hair; if you have these symptoms, consult your doctor.

Though losing weight won't necessarily "cure" PCOS, numerous studies have found that even a small decrease in weight and body fat can improve ovulation in overweight and obese women. "The brain is very sensitive to 'fatness' signals," explains Rose E. Frisch, Ph.D., author of Female Fertility and the Body Fat Connection (The University of Chicago Press).

It works the other way too. In an Arizona State University study, when underweight female athletes who were not having periods increased their body fat from 8.2 percent to 14.4 percent, they started having normal cycles.

Ronda Kelly quickly discovered the impact that gaining a little weight has on fertility: In 2005, weighing 116 pounds, she got pregnant with her second daughter, Audra. On the first try.

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Nursery Know-How

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 19:14:00 GMT

Even if you don't have the "designer" gene, these tips will help you plan a baby's room you'll love.

1. Look for inspiration
If you can't decide how to decorate the baby's room, think about a few favorite things from your or your partner's childhood or ask grandparents for items of sentimental value to help spark inspiration. "You also can get ideas from a flower, animal or color theme," say Michele Adams and Gia Russo of the Los Angeles-based design team MiGi. "Browsing fabrics and ribbons can also inspire decorative ideas."

2. Don't overdo your theme
If you go with a specific pattern or distinctive style, choose a few whimsical pieces and well-chosen accessories to illustrate it, but don't overload the room with them. As your child gets older, you can easily update the room without having to redecorate from top to bottom.

3. Create a cozy space
An inviting spot will help you enjoy special bonding moments. Place a lamp, books and necessities on a table nearby so you don't have to get up every time you need something. "This spot will likely become a favorite well past the toddler years," says Wendy Bellissimo, family lifestyle designer and author of Nesting (IW Press).

4. Buy long-lasting furniture
Choose pieces with multiple uses, such as a changing table that can also serve as a dresser, and a crib that can become a larger bed when the time is right. (If you get a used crib, make sure it meets current safety standards from the Juvenile Products Manufacturers Association; for information, see "New Mom's Buying Guide" on pg. 86.)

5. Get creative with color
Basic pink and blue are no longer the standard; choose a color you love and try not to feel confined by gender-specific palettes. "Yellow, green, taupe, cream and brown are great because later you can add pink or blue accents if you wish, which look great with any of those colors," suggests Bellissimo, who has designed nurseries for celebrities including Brooke Shields and Kelly Ripa.Bedding and accessories in contrasting or complementary shades and patterns also can liven up a room.

Nate Berkus, design expert for The Oprah Winfrey Show and author of Home Rules: Transform the Place You Live Into a Place You'll Love (Hyperion), suggests painting the nursery's ceiling, as your baby will be looking at it a lot. A mural also gives the baby something fun to view.

6. Define a play space
An area rug or mat provides a comfortable surface for playtime and a contained site for toys. Keep storage items nearby for easy cleanup.

7. Be careful with crib bedding
Though bedding can be colorful and decorative, you do need to take safety precautions. Don't place loose blankets or pillows in the crib with a baby younger than 12 months, and make sure she can't get her head stuck between the crib bumper and slats. Sheets should be tight-fitting and wrap securely around the corners of the mattress. Or try a crib sheet that stays in place with a zipper, such as Clouds and Stars QuickZip Crib Sheet (cloudsandstars.com).

8. Position the crib carefully
Avoid placing your baby's crib under a window or in the path of direct sunlight, which can be disturbing to a sensitive newborn and, on very hot days, might overheat her. Also, be sure not to place the child's bed or changing table under shelves or artwork that could fall or be pulled down by the baby.

"When arranging furniture, start with the crib," says David Harris, creative director at DucDuc in New York. "It's the largest piece in the room and the one you need most. Everything else will fall into place naturally."

9. Overestimate your storage needs
Clothing, toys, diapers and gear take up more space than you'd think, so you'll need plenty of baskets, bins, shelves and closet organizers to keep your baby's room tidy. If you have a toy chest, make sure that the hinges have a mechanism to prop up an open lid and that they won't pinch little fingers; also look for a model that will let in air if a child climbs inside and closes the lid.

10. Make it a room you love
"Nowadays, baby's rooms are decorated in grand ways," says Nava Writz, custom children's bedding designer for Nava's Designs. "If you want to go all-out, go all-out!" Or, if simplicity is your style, go with that. Whatever you choose, be true to your own style, and the nursery will be a special place.

Design for Small Spaces

Mount a continuous shelf approximately 18 inches from the ceiling for toys, framed photos and additional storage, advises Nate Berkus, design expert for The Oprah Winfrey Show.
Tiny nursery? A crib and changing area are the most essential features, say Michele Adams and Gia Russo.
To make the room appear more spacious, paint all the walls the same color, Wendy Bellissimo advises.

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Never Say Never

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 19:11:00 GMT

I knew exactly how I was going to look and feel when I was expecting. My pregnant profile would be buff-with-a-bump, outfitted in snug tops and hip-hugging jeans that would accentuate my belly. And while I'd had friends who gained (gasp!) 30-plus pounds during their pregnancies, I wasn't going to put on an ounce more than the advised 25.

Imagine how shocked I was to find myself in sloppy sweats, craving cheeseburgers and dry-heaving into a trash can every five minutes. Crippled by exhaustion, I saw less of my gym as the months wore on. By the end, I had packed on 48 pounds, and only eight were baby.

The day my daughter was induced (wait a minute! I wasn't going to be induced!), I had an epiphany. (I also had an epidural.) The universe had been whispering it in my ear all along: Never say never. Five years and a second birth later, it has become my mantra. Until you're in it, it's easy to say "No episiotomy," or "I'll never give my child a pacifier," or "My baby will only sleep in a crib."

Stuff happens
But in the throes of life, things change. When you've labored for two days and your doctor says your choices are an epidural or a C-section, you may find yourself opting for something formerly unthinkable. When you've bounced, rocked, sang to and swaddled an inconsolable baby for six hours, it may occur to you that getting her to sleep—even if it means popping in a pacifier or nursing her in your bed—might be better for both of you than sticking to your guns.

I've still got volumes to learn about parenting, but here's what I know: You don't have to decide today how you're going to act for the rest of your life. It doesn't matter how anyone else does it either. Stay true to yourself and your instincts. And don't judge another mom until you've driven a mile in her minivan.

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Natural Baby: Safe Remedies

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 19:04:00 GMT

Scalp and skin irritations

Symptoms Cradle cap: a harmless scaling on the scalp caused by skin secretions; eczema: red, itchy and scaly skin. Neither condition is contagious.
Suggested remedies
• Cradle cap: Apply olive or castor oil to his scalp for a few hours (cover with a cotton hat or gauze). Gently shampoo, then remove scales using a soft toothbrush.
• Eczema: Apply a chickweed ointment or compress, or add chickweed tea to the baby's bath water. Try calendula cream or a low-alcohol moisturizer such as Eucerin.
• Also for eczema, eliminate milk, soy and nuts from your baby's diet and from yours if you're breastfeeding. Or switch to a partially hydrolyzed formula or to one containing omega-3 fatty acids.
• Pregnant women with allergies can take probiotics--supplements that supply beneficial bacteria--in their last six weeks to help prevent allergies in their children. Natural-foods stores carry probiotics for infants; they can help prevent and treat eczema.
• Oatmeal baths soothe inflamed skin.
Do Not Use tea tree oil.
When To Call The Pediatrician If eczema becomes fiery red or skin develops pustules.

Ear infections

Symptoms Your child may rub or tug at his ear, act fussy, lose his appetite and run a fever.
Suggested remedies
• Limit your baby's intake of sugar (it suppresses immunity), dairy, wheat and soy. If you're nursing, reduce or eliminate those foods from your diet. If you're not breastfeeding, switch to a partially hydrolyzed formula.
• Limit pacifier use. Studies suggest doing this can significantly decrease ear-infection risk.
• Cut a yellow onion in half, warm in a 250° F oven, wrap in cheesecloth and hold until cool against your baby's ear. The sulfur content fights germs and reduces swelling. You also can put two drops of garlic oil in the baby's ear three times a day.
• If your baby needs antibiotics, give him probiotics too.
Do Not Use echinacea, elderberry or other herbs.
When To Call The Pediatrician If you don't see improvement after three days; if your baby doesn't "look right" or isn't behaving normally; if a baby under 3 months has a rectal temperature of 100.4° F or higher (3 to 6 months: over 101° F; 6 months or older: over 102° F).

Diarrhea and constipation

Symptoms Acute or chronic diarrhea: suddenly passing lots of watery stools (this kind is usually caused by infection) or passing smaller amounts of loose stools. Constipation: hard stools that are painful to pass or infrequent bowel movements.
Suggested remedies
• Mild diarrhea: Eliminate juice; give plenty of water, chamomile tea, mashed bananas, plain yogurt or Pedialyte. Acute diarrhea: Switch from milk-based formula to a dairy-free type, such as soy. If you're breastfeeding, do not stop.
• Give a few ounces of half-strength prune, apple or pear juice a few times a day to infants under 6 months who are constipated; older babies can have more juice as well as fiber.
• Probiotics may help restore intestinal function in cases of diarrhea and constipation.
Do Not Use the herb senna, anti-diarrheal medications, laxatives, suppositories or enemas.
When To Call The Pediatrician If diarrhea is accompanied by apparent cramping, abdominal pain, fever or bloody stools; if your baby shows signs of dehydration, such as infrequent urination, sunken eyes or doughy skin; if an infant hasn't had a bowel movement in two or three days, especially if he is being breastfed.

Colds and croup

Symptoms Colds: congestion, coughing or runny nose. Croup: an alarming "barking" cough that usually lasts three days. Both are caused by viruses, so antibiotics won't help. A fever under 100° F probably doesn't need to be treated if your child is behaving normally.
Suggested remedies
• Use saline solution and a bulb syringe to reduce nasal congestion.
• Put one drop of eucalyptus oil in a vaporizer or add one drop to bath water. Or mix a drop with almond or vegetable oil and rub on your baby's chest or blanket (avoid contact with his face). Note: Eucalyptus oil is toxic if ingested.
• Slice and warm a yellow onion (see "Ear Infections," pg. 64) and apply to your baby's chest to relieve coughing.
• If coughing is "productive," mix 1/2 teaspoon powdered ginger with 1 teaspoon Vaseline, rub on baby's chest and cover with a T-shirt.
• Give lots of fluids, limit dairy and increase vitamin C sources. If you're breastfeeding, alter your own diet in the same way.
• If your baby has croup, dress him warmly and take him outside; cool night air can break up phlegm, shrink inflamed membranes and calm coughing spasms.
• Hold and soothe your child; this will help restore normal breathing patterns.
Do Not Use goldenseal or grapefruit seed extract.
When To Call The Pediatrician If a baby under 3 months old has a rectal temperature over 100.4° F; if your baby has trouble breathing and/or makes a high-pitched sound when he breathes. Make the call as you prepare to go to the nearest emergency room.

Gas and "colic"

Symptoms Gas is usually quickly (and audibly) passed. "Colic"--inconsolable crying for hours by an otherwise healthy infant--often is blamed on gas or other digestive distress, though this is controversial. The crying usually begins between 2 and 6 weeks of age and resolves when the baby is 3 to 5 months old.
Suggested remedies
• Eliminate common allergens, such as milk, soy, wheat, corn, nuts and orange juice, from the baby's diet and from yours if you're nursing. Formula also may cause a problem, though some brands, such as Enfamil Nutramigen Lipil, contain ingredients designed to minimize symptoms.
• Give up to 4 ounces per day of room-temperature chamomile or fennel tea.
• Probiotics may help ease colic.
• Try giving Hyland's homeopathic Colic Tablets and Infants' Mylicon Drops; follow package directions.
Do Not Use fennel tea for more than seven to 10 days; don't give oatmeal to infants under 4 months.
When To Call The Pediatrician If your baby's symptoms include vomiting, diarrhea, fever or reduced appetite.

Safety First
Though experts say that the remedies described here are safe for babies under 1 year old, if you have any questions or concerns, check with your pediatrician before trying any of them.
For a list of books and websites that provide authoritative information on natural baby-care remedies, go to fitpregnancy.com/inthisissue and look for links from the December/January 2007 issue.

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Mind Your Relationship

Sarah Kraft — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 18:58:00 GMT

Whatever your life was like as a couple, pregnancy changes it irrevocably. Your focus, once centered on just you two, zooms in on the coming baby. So begins the transition to parenthood, an experience that can strengthen your bond as a couple if you communicate and nurture your relationship.

Before baby arrives
"All parents should realize that they must consciously decide to make their relationship a priority after the baby is born," says Mark E. Crawford, Ph.D., author of When Two Become Three: Nurturing Your Marriage After Baby Arrives (Revell). "Talk to each other about both the excitement and the anxiety associated with becoming a new parent. Expectant parents, especially fathers-to-be, often keep their feelings of anxiety inside."

Men experience the prospect of a baby in different ways. Reactions range from exhibiting sympathetic pregnancy symptoms to becoming violent toward the expectant woman. In fact, homicide was the leading cause of injury-related death for pregnant women and women who had recently given birth from 1991 to 1999, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Listen and learn
Despite such sobering information, becoming a parent ranks among life's most radical and exciting experiences—and one that may bring up new emotions for both you and your partner. He may feel left out of your pregnancy experience, but don't expect your partner to spontaneously communicate how he's feeling. Think of yourself as a human talking stick and initiate a discussion about parenthood and what it means to you as a couple. Both of you are likely experiencing not just joy and hope, but also worry.

"Talking helps normalize feelings and [promotes] an understanding that everyone has anxieties such as, 'Will I be a good parent? Will the baby be healthy?'" says Crawford. Being mindful of your partner's emotional life helps build a reservoir of good will that will fortify you both as you embrace the challenges of new parenthood.

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Make a Better Life

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 22:55:00 GMT

Pregnancy is a time for change. And for choices. And we're not just talking about whether you'll paint the nursery pink or yellow. "While you still have more time, re-evaluate what means most to you in life and what obligations you can let go of — for good," says Wendy Clarke Wilcox, M.D., M.P.H., professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Montefiore Medical Center in New York City. Read on for some points to ponder at this crucial juncture.

Your marriage Pregnancy can be a very self-absorbed time, and women often forget about their significant other. "Remember, your relationship with your partner is the foundation for your child," says psychotherapist Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D., author of The 10 Smartest Decisions A Woman Can Make Before 40 (HCI, 1998). Make time to discuss your upcoming roles. What's your partner's greatest fear? What is he looking forward to most? Let him in on what you're thinking and feeling. Talk about how other couples work out the 24/7 demands of life plus kids. "It's easier to be objective when you look at someone else," Tessina says.

Your spirituality If you've been ignoring your spiritual side, you may want to consider it now that you're having a child. Spirituality doesn't require going to a church, mosque or synagogue. "Take the time to sit in your backyard and look at the stars, or light a candle and take a bath while reading an inspirational book," suggests Wilcox. "When your life becomes all consumed with the baby, it's helpful to sit back and think about the bigger picture."

Are the burbs really best?
When those two lines appear in the pregnancy-test result window, the first thing many people think is, "It's time to move to the suburbs." But for a new family, the city may be better. Living in a busy metropolis can make you feel less isolated--just step out your door and there's a world of people to amuse you and your baby. And plenty of research has pointed to suburban sprawl as a contributor to the obesity epidemic; city dwellers are more likely to use their feet to get from place to place. Of course, if you choose to move, there are plenty of healthy options. When house hunting, ask yourself:
• Are the sidewalks plentiful and in good shape?
• Are there enough traffic lights and signs to cross main roads? How about bridges for pedestrians?
• Do drivers stop for pedestrians? For bike riders?
• Do speed limits seem conducive to biking?
• Are there any bike lanes, bike routes or walking paths?
• Are neighborhood shops, parks and/or schools within about a quarter mile of your home so that you could reasonably walk to them?

For more on what to look for in a healthy town, visit:

•walkable.org/article6.htm
•www.bicyclinginfo.org/de/friendly.htm

Easy baby-weight banishers (no sitter required!)
Share tummy time! Put your baby in front of you and get in Plank pose, aka the start of a push-up: Place your hands on the floor shoulder-width apart and straighten your arms (without locking your elbows). Your legs are straight behind you, weight resting on your toes. Keeping your back flat, make faces at your baby; try to hold the position for 30 seconds to 2 minutes. Drop gently to your knees, give your baby a kiss, and come right back up again. Repeat 5 times.

Do some squats with your baby in a front carrier. Start with your feet hip-distance apart, toes forward--hold on to a couch or chair with one hand for balance if you need to. Lower your tush (like you're going to sit down), keeping your weight on your heels, then come back up. Aim for 2 to 3 sets of 12 to 15 repetitions.

Power stroll at the mall. Instead of hitting the stores immediately, do a once-around first. Exercise your abs at the same time by contracting your core muscles, as if you're pulling in your bellybutton. Keep your shoulders down and back straight for a hunch-free stride.

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Labor Lite

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 22:51:00 GMT

The words “easy labor” may seem like an oxymoron, but there are steps you can take, both throughout pregnancy and during labor, to make your experience less stressful and more comfortable, less clinical and more joyful. And although the following tips won’t guarantee you’ll have a sweat-free, pang-free birth, they can help make your labor and delivery more manageable.

1. Start preparing now. When you’re in the grip of labor, it’s too late to crack open that self-hypnosis book or locate a birthing ball. Preparation counts. Case in point: Squatting increases the size of the pelvic opening by about 28 percent. But if you wait until you’re in labor to try it for the first time, your squatting stamina won’t add up to … well, squat.

2. Seek higher education. Take a childbirth class, and enroll as early as possible: Not only do classes fill up fast, but some, such as Bradley courses, run 12 weeks, which means you need to start them in your second trimester. Learn about the different stages of labor so you know what to expect. Ask tough questions—and “stupid” ones, too. Find out your doctor’s philosophy on epidurals vs. nondrug ways of managing pain, as well as on Cesarean sections. “The better prepared you are, the more choices you have during labor,” says nurse practitioner Lynette Miya, M.N., R.N.P., co-owner of Bright Beginnings & Beyond, a childbirth and family resource
center in Redondo Beach, Calif. “You don’t want to arrive at the hospital without any idea of what’s going to happen.” Once labor starts, no surprise is a good surprise.

3. Take a prenatal yoga class. “The most important thing women learn through yoga is how to focus,” says Carmela Cattuti, L.P.N., founder of Yoga for Pregnancy & Fitness in Boston. “Yoga also strengthens the entire body, increases flexibility and gives you stamina. But maybe more importantly, it helps your mind relax.” This, in turn, leaves your body free to go about the business of birthing.

4. Hire a certified doula. Doulas are nonmedical professionals trained to provide emotional and physical support as well as information to women during pregnancy and labor. Studies have found that with a trained doula’s continuous support, epidural use decreased by 60 percent; C-sections, 50 percent; oxytocin use for induction, 40 percent; forceps use, 40 percent; and average length of labor, 25 percent. To locate a certified doula in your area, visit dona.org.

5. Give yourself options. During my first labor, breathing exercises gave me a massive sinus attack. Worse, I was out of tricks—no alternative pain-coping techniques, no weapon handy to beat my husband for getting me pregnant. Don’t let this happen to you. Learn several techniques to manage pain, such as self-hypnosis, position changes, heat packs and different breathing methods; bring music to play for relaxation. “If you don’t know what your options are, you don’t have any,” says Tracy Hartley, a certified doula and owner of BEST Doula Service in Southern California.

6. See no evil, hear no evil. Some childbirth educators believe graphic images, catastrophic tales and words of discouragement (“You’ll never be able to get that monster out without a C-section!”) can affect your subconscious and
create a mental block during labor. At best, negative thoughts make labor stressful; at worst, they’ll actually intensify pain. Change the channel, cover your eyes, tune out or walk away when the subject matter makes you uncomfortable. Bonus: Being able to do this will help you ignore all the unwanted advice you’ll get after the baby is born.

7. Set the mood. For most women, a dark, quiet environment is ideal during labor, so ask your nurse or partner to dim the lights and minimize noise. Little touches make a difference: a favorite pillow, pair of socks or soothing scent. “Aromatherapy, especially the scent of lavender, is very calming in labor,” says nurse practitioner Miya.

8. Don’t take labor lying down. Upright positions, such as standing, walking, kneeling, slow dancing, sitting and squatting, allow gravity to help move the baby down and out. “Sometimes, getting the baby into the pelvis is like fitting a key into a lock,” Hartley says. “You need to do a little jiggling. Rocking back and forth on your hands and knees may get the baby into position.”

9. Get wet. Early in labor, a warm bath is a blessing. Later, the sustained warmth and weightlessness that water provides can feel more like a miracle. If you have access to a warm tub during labor, run—OK, roll, if you have to—and take the plunge. (Be sure to get your doctor or midwife’s green light before doing so; there’s a risk of infection if your water has broken.) If a soak isn’t possible, take a shower.

10. Stand your ground. Labor transforms you, but it won’t make you suddenly love lime Jell-O, New Age music or the sight of your in-laws as you breathe through a contraction. People may press all kinds of suggestions on you during labor; listen but don’t feel you have to go along with them. It’s your body, your baby and your labor, so stick to your guns. Consider it practice for when your baby is a teenager.

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Keep it Simple

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 22:45:00 GMT

The prospect of caring for a newborn 24/7 can be daunting, with the floppy head, shrill cries and sheer mystery of it all. But with time, practice and a common-sense approach, you'll quickly be a diapering, bathing, burping pro. Our wisdom gleaned over the past 15 years will help you get there—and give you some much-needed perspective and peace of mind.

1. Breastfeeding is the healthiest way to feed your baby. But it's not necessarily easy. Lactation has come out of the shadows, and it's no longer taboo to admit that nursing is difficult for many women. If you find you're having any problems whatsoever, call a lactation consultant—pronto.

And if you still can't breastfeed, or if you can't breastfeed exclusively, know that you're not raising the next Hannibal Lecter by giving your little one formula. "Still, any bit helps, so if you are able to nurse your baby once or twice a day, do," says Atlanta pediatrician Jennifer Shu, M.D., co-author of Heading Home With Your Newborn: From Birth to Reality (American Academy of Pediatrics).

2. You don't need to bathe your baby every day. In fact, you shouldn't, as too much water and soap can irritate a newborn's delicate skin. "Babies are not yet rolling in the mud, so bathing twice a week is usually what I recommend," Shu says. In the meantime, a sponge bath should do the job if your baby has a particularly messy blowout, or if milk or other crud builds up in the folds of his neck or elsewhere.

3. It's really important to put your baby to sleep on his back. Since the federal Back to Sleep campaign began 14 years ago, studies have confirmed that back sleeping reduces the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) by 50 percent. Place your baby on his back to sleep. Every time. No excuses. And make sure any caregivers do, too, including grandma.

4. Infants are more mobile than you think. Although the average age at which babies roll over is 4 months, it could happen as early as 2 weeks. "The first time your baby rolls over could be off the bed, changing table or couch," Shu says, "so get in the habit from day one of never leaving him unattended on a raised surface." Also never put him in a bouncy seat on, say, the kitchen counter—even newborns can jiggle enough to send the seat crashing to the floor.

5. Three out of four car seats are installed incorrectly. You need to become an expert at this, so read your car seat and vehicle manuals thoroughly, take a class if possible, and have your installation inspected by a professional. (For a list of car-seat safety checks nationwide, visit usa.safekids.org and click on "find car seat >> check-up events near you.") "Knowing how to install your baby's car seat is of paramount importance," Shu says.

6. You don't need to change a wet diaper immediately. "Today's disposables wick away moisture, so your baby will stay dry until the diaper is close to overflowing," Shu says. (Not that you should let it get this full; this can set the stage for a nasty rash, especially if you're using cloth diapers.) Use discretion with wet diapers at night, too: Changing your baby can be stimulating and make it difficult for him to get back to sleep. A poopy diaper is another matter, though: Change promptly.

7. Your job is to go with the flow. Most newborns have absolutely no eating or sleeping schedules, and trying to impose them will only frustrate you both. But with time, your baby will naturally fall into a routine. "Babies typically establish a sleep routine between the age of 1 and 4 months," Shu says. "Eating is more predictable: Newborns fall into an eating pattern pretty soon after birth."

8. Crying is normal. It's your baby's only way of expressing himself. This is small comfort at 3 a.m., of course. To soothe your baby, try pediatrician Harvey Karp's "5 S's":

• Swaddle your baby tightly.
• Hold him on his side or stomach.
• Make shushing noises in his ear.
• Make them as loud as the crying.
• Swing him, either in your arms or a swing.
• Let your baby suck. A pacifier, bottle or breast will do.

If this doesn't work and you become concerned, don't be shy about calling your pediatrician. "It's typical for infants to cry for a total of two to three hours over the course of a day," Shu explains. (To make matters even worse, it often peaks around your dinnertime.) "But if there's a change in your baby's crying pattern and you're worried, err on the side of caution and seek help. Parents' hunches are often correct."

Also keep in mind that babies do outgrow their fussiness. "It usually begins about two weeks after birth and peaks by the age of 6 weeks," Shu explains. "And it's usually gone by 3 to 4 months."

9. It's OK to walk away. If your baby is screaming inconsolably and you need a break, take 10 seconds or 10 minutes—whatever is required—to compose yourself. Just be sure your baby is safe before doing so. "Babies don't die from being in a crib or bassinet when you have to walk away," Shu says. "They die when parents get so overworked that they shake them."

10. You don't need to entertain your baby every minute. Whether they're looking out the window or staring at a light, infants are continually learning. Give your baby the space to discover his world—and don't feel that you need to bombard him with stimulation; this may only make him fussy. "Any time you spend engaged with your baby is quality time," Shu explains. "Even if you're doing something as mundane as going to the grocery store, talk to him and make eye contact as you shop."

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How to Calm Your Colicky Baby

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 22:41:00 GMT

Pediatrician Harvey N. Karp tells parents to use his "Five S's" — which simulate the womb's environment — to turn on an infant's calming reflex and help her sleep longer. Tip: Practice with a doll or sleeping baby.

Swaddling Wrap the baby securely in a blanket with her arms tucked inside so she can't flail.
Side/stomach position Hold the baby snugly in your arms on her left side or stomach.
Shushing sounds Use white-noise machines, humidifiers, fans, vacuums, etc. The shushing should be as loud as the baby's crying.
Swinging Try rocking, car rides or infant swings.
Sucking Let your baby nurse, take a bottle of breast milk or formula, or suck on your finger or a pacifier.

To see Dr. Karp's 5 S's in action, launch this video clip.

Need more help? Check out The Happiest Baby "Super-Soothing" Sleep Sounds, with its 5 white noise tracks that promise to help calm the fussies super fast. An extra bonus: it may even help boost baby's sleep by 1-3 hours at night. According to Karp, you can stop the sound whenever you want, but most parents use it for a year or more. Find out more at thehappiestbaby.com.

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Get Ready for Motherhood

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 22:36:00 GMT

When our first child was a few weeks old, my husband and I were struggling to get dinner on the table. Exhausted and overwhelmed, he looked at me and said, “How do parents get anything done?” How indeed, I wondered for weeks, struggling at home without help. I felt tired, lonely and a tad frustrated with my husband. Turns out these feelings are all too common. They can be dangerous, too.

“Moms who are sleep deprived, socially isolated or have poor partner support are all at a higher risk for postpartum depression [PPD],” explains Shoshana Bennett, Ph.D., author of 2007’s Postpartum Depression for Dummies and Pregnant on Prozac. But even if you don’t end up clinically depressed, it’s hard to enjoy your new baby when you’re exhausted, lonely and frustrated with your marriage. But there are steps you can take before your baby is born—even before your due date—to be better prepared for these challenges.

Here’s what’s been shown to work:

Home alone—together

Before you give birth, put a plan into action so you don’t end up spending too much time at home by yourself with the baby. “If a mother is in charge day in and day out for eight hours or more per day, she is at high risk for PPD,” Bennett says. In fact, the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists identifies lack of support from others as a major factor in PPD.

Although the web and e-mail provide plenty of opportunities for networking and support, you need to get out of the house and interact with real live people on a regular basis. “Before babies, we had meetings to go to and people to see,” explains Heather Gibbs Flett, co-author of 2008’s The Rookie Mom’s Handbook. “It can be very disorienting to have the whole day as a blank slate before you.”

Get-Ready Strategies:

>Organize a new-mothers’ group. Make a commitment to meet regularly: You’ll be more likely to follow through. Childbirth-ed classes, La Leche League (which welcomes pregnant women) and breastfeeding support stores are great ways to meet other moms-to-be who are due around the same time as you.

>Hang a large wall calendar in a prominent location. Get used to scheduling activities into your days now, while you still know what day it is. “If you don’t schedule time for yourself on a regular basis so that you can count on it and look forward to it, you’re asking for trouble,” says Bennett.

The parent trap

Ninety-two percent of the men and women in a prominent study of new parents reported experiencing more conflict in their marriage after bringing baby home. The division of labor was, by far, the No. 1 cause of trouble.

Talking about your expectations ahead of time is key, says Pamela Jordan, Ph.D., R.N., president of the Becoming Parents Program, Inc., and associate professor at the University of Washington in Seattle. “Each of you is forming a future biography in your head about how life is going to be and who’s going to do what,” she explains. “But if you don’t discuss it with each other, things tend to fall into a very stereotypical sex role division of labor. If that’s not what you want, you need to plan ahead.”

Jordan urges couples to sit down and imagine what a typical day with a baby will be like for them. Who will feed and dress her in the morning? Who will take her to day care? Who will pick her up at the end of the day? Should the other person be responsible for making dinner?

Get-Ready Strategies:

>Practice your post-baby roles. “If the woman has always done the grocery shopping, but the couple agree that the man is going to do it after the baby is born, don’t wait until the baby arrives to make that shift,” advises psychologist Deborah Roth Ledley, Ph.D., author of 2008’s Becoming a Calm Mom. “This will get everyone used to their new roles and responsibilities before assuming the biggest new roles of all: mom and dad.”

>Line up child care. Interview and thoroughly check the references of potential babysitters before you even bring the baby home.

Your new nightlife

People like to joke about how little sleep you’ll get as a new mom, but sleep deprivation is no laughing matter. “Sleep can make the difference between sanity and insanity,” Bennett says. “Sleep deprivation lowers levels of serotonin, one of the most important mood-regulating brain chemicals.” This can contribute to postpartum depression.

Get-Ready Strategies:

>Create a sleep plan for yourself. You need about 5 1∕2 hours of uninterrupted sleep to get a full cycle, says Bennett, so plan on splitting the nightshift in half. “It only takes one person to care for a baby,” she explains.“The other should be off-duty and sleeping for half the night, and then you switch.” Some couples prefer to alternate nights. If you’re breastfeeding,have your partner give the baby an occasional bottle of pumped milk during the night.

>Research baby sleep philosophies. Learn about the various schools of thought and discuss them with your partner. Studies show that new parents who learned how to promote healthy sleep habits for their baby got more sleep and felt less stressed and more confident than those who didn’t do this. They were also more satisfied with their marriages.

>Consider co-sleeping. Having the baby close to you means you don’t have to fully wake up to nurse.

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Get Off Your Back!

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 22:32:00 GMT

When Pamela Berens was a medical student in Minnesota, she learned that lying on your back with your feet in stirrups was not the only way to have a baby. “We saw a lot of Hmong women [from Southeast Asia], and many of them gave birth squatting in a corner of the hospital room,” recalls Berens, who’s now an OB-GYN at the University of Texas Medical School at Houston.

The standard hospital labor-and-delivery position is also not the ideal one. For one thing, when you’re lying on your back, your uterus compresses major blood vessels, potentially depriving the baby of oxygen and making you dizzy or queasy. “Most women feel better when they are not lying on their back during labor,” says certified nurse-midwife Katy Dawley, Ph.D., director of the Institute of Midwifery at Philadelphia University in Pennsylvania. “Lying on your side, standing, sitting, walking, rocking—anything that keeps you active can help decrease pain and speed up labor.”

When you’re ready to push, squatting can be especially effective. One study found that first-time mothers who squatted while pushing had labors that were an average of 23 minutes shorter than women who labored semi-reclining. They also required significantly less oxytocin (Pitocin) to stimulate contractions and had fewer “mechanically assisted” deliveries (i.e., forceps or vacuum) and fewer and less severe perineal tears and episiotomies.

Goin’ mobile
Unless you’re having a drug-free delivery, one thing that can help increase your position options is choosing what’s called a “walking epidural,” a newer combination spinal/epidural anesthetic that allows you to be aware of your contractions yet able to move more easily than with a standard epidural. “You’ll be numb and won’t be running around, but you’ll still have good muscle function and will be more mobile,” Berens explains. “You can probably use a birthing ball [to sit or lean on].” Berens’ hospital even allows women who’ve had epidurals (traditional or walking) to give birth while lying on their side. “I suspect many others would be open to different delivery positions,” she says.

If you’ve had a walking epidural (or are forgoing drugs altogether), other options include delivering while sitting on a birthing stool, kneeling, crouching on your hands and knees or, as women do the world over, squatting. Don’t want to squat in the corner of your hospital room? No problem! Use the squatting bar on your hospital bed for support. The correct form: knees wide, feet flat.
Don’t try squatting unsupported unless you’re sure you can keep your balance. In fact, you should get in shape by practicing squatting during your pregnancy: You don’t want to find out at the crucial moment that your muscles aren’t up to the task.

Seven soothing labor positions
“Discuss the different positions you think you’d like to try with your doctor or midwife beforehand,” says nurse-midwife Katy Dawley. “In the throes of labor, you’re not going to be able to advocate for yourself.” What’s more, fetal heart monitoring can help determine which positions you can sustain without impairing circulation to the baby during labor, so it’s best to have a repertoire available. Here are some options:

1. Get on all fours This position eases back pain and helps the baby rotate into the optimal position for delivery—face down.
2. Lean Drape your chest over a table, bed, countertop, pillow or birthing ball.
3. Lie on your left side This may increase blood flow to your baby and can help reduce backache. Support your belly and legs with pillows.
4. Lunge Place one foot on a sturdy chair or footstool and lean into that foot during contractions.
5. Rock Sit on a large exercise ball, the edge of a bed or chair and gently rock back and forth.
6. Sit and lean Sitting in a chair, prop up one foot and lean into it during contractions.
7. Sway Put your arms around your partner’s neck and pretend you’re slow dancing.

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Get Moving

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 22:27:00 GMT

Use these nine months to find an activity you enjoy that won't be too tough to continue after your tot makes his entrance. Aim to exercise at least 30 minutes a day, most days of the week, but watch the intensity: If you can't talk without gasping, you're working too hard.

5 great activities to try

Walking
Why it's wonderful now It's easy, effective and can be done in 10-minute sessions if you get winded easily. Walking is also low-impact, which keeps stress off your joints so there's less chance of injury.
Keep in mind Avoid uneven or slippery surfaces--you're more prone to fall as your belly grows and your center of gravity shifts. Plus, your body is producing more relaxin, a hormone that causes the ligaments in your pelvis to soften. "Although this is helpful for delivery, it also means that all your joint ligaments become more lax, making you more likely to twist or sprain your wrists, ankles and knees," says Anita Sadaty, M.D., attending physician in obstetrics and gynecology at North Shore University Hospital in Manhasset, N.Y. Cross trainers provide more lateral support than running shoes; you may need to go up a half size by your third trimester.
How to adapt it later Put your baby in a front carrier (later, a baby backpack), and pick up the pace by bending your arms and driving them back as fast as you can. Seek out hilly neighborhoods or scenic hiking paths you may have avoided for safety during your pregnancy.

Swimming
Why it's wonderful now Water provides resistance with a low risk of injury, allowing you to work harder without overheating, whether you're treading it or swimming, walking or even dancing in it. And even in your ninth month, you can still look and feel graceful in the pool. (We promise!)
Keep in mind Swimming with poor technique could make neck, shoulder or back pain worse. Stop if you're hurting.
How to adapt it later Raise a water baby! Check into mommy-and-infant water programs at the YMCA, your local gym or a swim center.

Pilates
Why it's wonderful now Pilates strengthens all your core muscles, helping to lessen lower-back pain.
Keep in mind Avoid lying flat on your back during the second and third trimesters; speak to your instructor about using a wedge, pillow or bolster to keep your head higher than your belly while performing exercises.
How to adapt it later Pop in a Pilates DVD while your baby is napping, or ask the instructor at your local gym if it's OK to let your child watch in a carrier from the sidelines (free entertainment for your baby!).

Yoga
Why it's wonderful now Yoga improves balance, which is affected by pregnancy body-weight shifts; relieves stress with breathing and meditation techniques; and helps soothe the aches and pains of pregnancy. Yoga postures can also open hip joints, which could benefit you during delivery, says Chicago certified personal trainer Michael Sena, author of Lean Mom, Fit Family (Rodale, 2005).
Keep in mind Avoid inverted and extreme positions, especially those in which your legs are far apart (like Pigeon or Tailor pose). Although relaxin will allow you to stretch farther than usual, this can lead to muscle tears, so take it easy. Also, avoid lying on your back after the first trimester. Prenatal yoga is safe for all trimesters, and (bonus!) you may meet some new friends.
How to adapt it later Try power yoga to work up a sweat and build muscle endurance. Put your baby in a bouncy seat next to your sticky mat (or give your baby his own). Some studios also offer mommy-and-me yoga classes.

Strength training
Why it's wonderful now Lifting weights helps counteract the higher risk for injury during pregnancy by strengthening muscles surrounding the joints, Sena says. It'll also help prepare you for the heavy lifting of motherhood.
Keep in mind Make sure to breathe in and out evenly, rather than tax your pelvic area by exhaling too forcefully. You'll avoid overloading your loosening joints by working to fatigue (doing a lot of reps) using lighter (3- or 5-pound) weights rather than 10-pounders.
How to adapt it later Shoot for heavier weights that you can lift for only about 8 to 12 reps. If you're joining a gym, make sure it offers day care--many do--at hours that fit your schedule. And find a good postnatal DVD.

Start Active Family Rituals
Begin these routines, or your own versions, today. Even a simple morning stretch gets your body moving.

Go for a weekly early-evening hike Choose flat, wide paths as your pregnancy progresses. Once your baby is born, continue the tradition by putting her in a front carrier and, later, a baby backpack. Your child will love the sights and sounds of nature (especially during the notorious "witching hour" of 4 to 6 p.m.); plus, he'll learn from the movement. "Muscle has memory, and feeling you move will help him emulate that skill later in his life," says Sena.

Plant a small flower or vegetable garden Wear gloves and wash your hands afterward to avoid contracting toxoplasmosis--an infection spread via soil or cat feces that can harm a fetus. As your child grows, he'll delight in digging for earthworms, picking veggies and smelling the roses. Plus, just 30 minutes of gardening burns 145 calories.

Throw a Sunday morning dance party After you've lazed around reading the paper, crank up some tunes and bust a move.

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Eat Right Now

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 22:23:00 GMT

Follow these basic nutritional guidelines to ensure that you and your baby get what you both need.

Moms-to-be need at least the following daily:

3 servings from the milk, yogurt and cheese group
6 ounces from the meat, poultry, fish, beans, eggs and nuts group
3 servings from the fruit group
4 servings from the vegetable group
9 servings from the bread, cereal, rice and pasta group

Use fats, oils and sweets sparingly.
Aim for 25–35 grams of fiber a day.
Drink at least 64 ounces of fluid daily, more if you’re active and during hot weather.
Follow guidelines in the U.S. Department of Agriculture’s Food Guide Pyramid. To order a brochure, write to the Center for Nutrition Policy and Promotion, 1120 20th St. N.W., Suite 200, North Lobby, Washington, DC 20036 or visit www.usda.gov/cnpp to download a printable version.

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Eat Better

Sarah Kraft — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 22:20:00 GMT

The more nutritious your prenatal diet is, the better off you and your baby will be. So those extra 300 daily calories (yup, only 300, and only in your second and third trimesters!) should be carefully chosen. And here's a thought: Keep up the good eating once your baby is born. Because before you know it, your little one will be reaching for what's on your plate. If any of the bad habits described here sound familiar, now's the time to lose them for good.

Old Habit: Skipping breakfast
Why it's bad "During pregnancy, blood sugar can drop very quickly due to a rise in a hormone in the placenta that stimulates insulin production," says Sadaty. "Skipping meals can lead to nausea, lightheadedness and vomiting." And they don't call it morning sickness for nothing: Pregnancy-related nausea is often worse when your stomach's empty. Once you start breastfeeding, eating breakfast is crucial to getting in enough daily calories for milk production.
New healthy habit Eat a simple but nutritious breakfast. Ideally you want something with protein, carbohydrates and a bit of fat. Have a bowl of high-fiber cereal with milk, topped with fruit. Or a piece of whole-wheat toast with peanut butter, plus a bowl of strawberries.

Old Habit: Raiding the vending machine
Why it's bad Most of those goodies are loaded with fat, salt and empty calories. "Whatever time you have as a pregnant woman, you're going to have even less as a new mom," says Lauren Slayton, R.D., director of Foodtrainers in New York City. "So get into the habit now of keeping convenient, nutritious snacks on hand."
New healthy habit Stock up on granola bars, low-salt soups, string cheese, baked chips or cut-up fruit and vegetables. Or make your own nutritious trail mix to stash in your desk or glove compartment: 10 almonds, plus 2 tablespoons of dried blueberries or cranberries

Old Habit: Forgoing fish
Why it's bad Yes, some seafood contains mercury, which can cross the placenta and harm your baby. But mercury-phobia can rob you of the benefits of fish and shellfish, which are low in saturated fat and contain high-quality protein. Not to mention omega-3 fatty acids, which can boost baby's brainpower and vision, and even help prevent postpartum depression, studies show. An added bonus: A small-scale study published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition found that higher levels of DHA (a type of omega-3) in the mother's blood correlated with better sleeping patterns in her newborn.
New healthy habit Avoid eating shark, swordfish, king mackerel or tilefish. Instead, enjoy up to 12 ounces (two average meals) a week of a variety of fish and shellfish that are lower in mercury, such as wild Pacific salmon and tilapia, or ask your doctor about taking an omega-3 supplement. (Canned tuna's safety is up for debate--see page 29.)

Old Habit: Not drinking enough water
Why it's bad Your blood volume nearly doubles by the third trimester, so you need plenty of water to help create it. Poor fluid intake can lead to lightheadedness and fainting, and dehydration can land you in the hospital facing serious consequences, including abnormally low amniotic-fluid levels and preterm labor.
New healthy habit Slayton recommends drinking at least eight 8-ounce glasses of water a day. "Pale and plentiful urine is the key that signifies you're drinking enough]," she says. To stay hydrated, try keeping bottles of water with you at all times, and make deals with yourself throughout the day: You won't go to lunch until you finish a bottle; you have to polish off a bottle before your afternoon meeting is over. You get the drift.

Indulge Your Cravings

What are you longing for? Here are some healthy options packing only about 150 calories each.

You crave: Crunchy
Satisfy with: 4 cups Jolly Time Healthy Pop butter flavor popcorn (94 percent fat-free) sprinkled lightly with grated Parmesan cheese.

You crave: Sweet
Satisfy with: 1 melted Hershey's Miniatures Special Dark bar poured over 2 cups sliced strawberries.

You crave: Salty
Satisfy with: 1 Morningstar Farms veggie corn dog spread with 1 tablespoon mustard.

You crave: Greasy
Satisfy with: English muffin pizza, made with 1/4 cup tomato sauce, 1/4 cup part-skim mozzarella and 1/2 whole-wheat English muffin; place in toaster oven until cheese melts.

You crave: Creamy
Satisfy with: 3 tablespoons hummus spread on a 4-inch whole-wheat pita.

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